My gf has a 10 year old son. He tries to get fly and talk back to his mother, disrespect her or puts on a tantrum when he doesn't get it his way. The thing that bothers me is that he does it in front of me at times. Now mind you this doesn't happen all the time but on the instances that it does, it makes me feel a certain way. I'll pull my girl to the side and tell her, "You're being soft with him, you need to stop being his FRIEND and act as the authority!, you baby him a lot and reward him for any little thing, you need to put your foot in his as* once in a while". In the meantime i'm over here thinking what i would do to him if given the permission and all, but i hold back cuz hes not my kid and i don't want any problems with anyone. I told my girl, in the event of having one together, she's going to recognize how hard of a father i'll be and teach them at a young age to respect first before anything, i feel parents are too soft nowadays and this is the result, young spoiled "its me or nothing" type of kids.
you're in a lose/lose situation. Damn if you do damn if you don't. He's going to continue this into his teenage years and there will come a time where u will get into an altercation with this boy. Your best bet is not have any kids with this woman and leave the relationship. The kid will never respek or listen to you