official retail/customer service horror stories and ranting

[Two Stacks]

I worked a 24 hour gas station for like 3 years. The amount of fukkery and stupidity I witnesses was on some but because I usually worked overnight and I was an assistant manager, I usually got free reign to handle most situations like I wanted.

So I'm stocking some stuff around the store and this extra dusty ass white dude comes into the store, looking like he just got through taking a hit of meth.

He goes to the beer cooler, grabs an 18 pack, a 6 pack, and asks for a pack of smokes. I ring him up and tell him his amount so this dude pulls out like 4 large ziplock bags of various change and starts pulling it out.

Him: Just trying to get rid of this change, man.

Me: Do I look like a bank. I'm not taking all that change.

Him: Actually, it's legal tender! You have to take it!

Me: Oh, do I? Seems to me like you might be intoxicated and I don't feel comfortable selling you alcohol or tobacco products.

Him: That's BS! You can't do that because I haven't had a sip of alcohol!

Me:

Him: I want to speak to a manager!

Me: Lemme see if the manager is available for you 'holds up nametag that says manager'

Him: Fukk you and this store!

Me: I'll be sure to let the manager know how you feel

CAC stormed out the store, mad as Fukk.

I stayed fukking with extremely rude customers. You throw your money on the counter, I'll crumple your bills and push it towards the edge. You act rude for no reason, my debit system might be down. You complain when I ask for your ID, maybe it looks fake to me.

 

[CASHAPP]

The new manager at my store(Black guy) that replaced the one who was always buttering up to customers and always walking around....is completely different brehs...more beneath the radar...in a month I have not got that bullshyt about how "_the manager said I could..." shyt the spoiled people came with..as a side note ill be switching to a night shift oin a week cause I toldnone of mt bosses I prefer that...I already know mainly younger people come through at that time...but any of you have stories since that is when the freaks come out?

 

[Two Stacks]

Last night for the first time it was me, and just the sales managers. All other managers/sups/leads were off. So I had to do some shyt. So I'm pulling my registers walking with 3 registers and:

Cust: Excuse me.

Me: Yes, sir? :curtis: *you dont see me walking with 3 registers of money*

Cust: How can I try these headphones?

Me: Sir, you would have to purchase them. That's the only way I can take off the security lock. :reallyson:

Cust: I can't try them before I buy them, they're $200+.

Me: No sir, that 's our policy. *Chris. Can i get you to handle this customer?*

Him: THAT IS NOT HAPPENING. Who can I talk to to get this off? Are you a manager?

Me: Yes, but you still can't take them off. It is my policy.

*leaves*

Motherfukker. What an inconsiderate bytch.

 

[Gains]

I've had all kinds of women leave my store, pissed off, because they think I'm supposed to bend over to their will. My favorite was also one of the shortest...

We don't get typical breaks so we usually have to try to snack between customers. So here I am, taking a bite of my burger when this walking mass of white jello waddles up to my counter, looking like she bleeds A1 steak sauce, and feels the need to comment on my weight.

Fat White Chick: When I saw how skinny you were, I was wondering if you ever ate. 'Laugh'

Me: When I saw how fat you were, I was wondering if you ever stopped.

Her:

Me:

Customer behind her:

She proceeded to waddle outta the store, leaving all her food behind while I continued eating my burger and started ringing up the other customer.

She still comes in the store but she hasn't mentioned my weight again.

right Al Bundy

 

[shutterguy]

Last night for the first time it was me, and just the sales managers. All other managers/sups/leads were off. So I had to do some shyt. So I'm pulling my registers walking with 3 registers and:

Cust: Excuse me.

Me: Yes, sir? :curtis: *you dont see me walking with 3 registers of money*

Cust: How can I try these headphones?

Me: Sir, you would have to purchase them. That's the only way I can take off the security lock. :reallyson:

Cust: I can't try them before I buy them, they're $200+.

Me: No sir, that 's our policy. *Chris. Can i get you to handle this customer?*

Him: THAT IS NOT HAPPENING. Who can I talk to to get this off? Are you a manager?

Me: Yes, but you still can't take them off. It is my policy.

*leaves*

Motherfukker. What an inconsiderate bytch.

Customers be killing me when they here the word NO, it's like taking a childs rattle or pacifier away.

 

[Fart Knocker]

-working at dunkin dounts in high school and people would get mad at me over the prices (bytch I make miniumum wage, do you really think im the guy who decides our prices?)

-having a buy one get one free promotion on a certain product and people bring a completely different product up and act mad that we wont give it away for free

-selling cars...people want fully loaded cars for prices you cant even get the base trim level for
-selling cars...had someone yesterday who wanted $12,000 trade in for their 2002 truck with 147,000 miles on it

-selling cars: -Me: "This vehicle comes standard with satellite radio."
-Customer: "What's satellite radio."
-Me:

 

[Fart Knocker]

when you work in nyc, customers expect you to be fluent in their native tongue. I can understand fluency in Spanish being necessary in the Bronx, but id be working in manhattan and people would be like "Do you speak French?" (Why in the fukk would I speak French?)

 

[mannyrs13]

Customers think they slick when they mention the competition. Some time last week, I jump on a register to cut the line down. I'm ringing up one of my employees and she's looking for a coupon in the book. The lady behind her says, can't you ring me up while she does that. I say, I can't until she pays first. The lady says, this is why I go to the competition. I'm thinking like, fukk if I care. She got two gift cards and was getting mad cuz I wasn't being delicate with one. Best buy gift cards are different so you gotta rip the cover off to reveal the strip to activate. I was tearing it and she's like no you gotta do it neater, it's a gift. The worse is when the competition is closed so their customers come in. Mainly on certain holidays. I remember it happening back in the day when I was at Winn Dixie and publix was closed on thanksgiving. People coming in already upset cuz they don't shop there so they extra bytchy.

 

[Fart Knocker]

in high school it amazed me that people cant understand basic drive thru rule/etiquette. People would actually skip in front of cars that already ordered, and then act like I was an a$$hole for telling them you cant cut people off who already ordered.
many people also drove straight past the speaker/ordering board and tried to order everything right at the window

 

[Fart Knocker]

I went to Burger King this morning.
No line in the drive thru.


Chick on intercom: "Welcome to Burger King. May I take your order, please?"
Me:
Me: "May I have a medium vanilla iced coffee, please?"
Chick on the intercom: "No ice coffee. The machine broke."
Me: "The machine broke what, ma'am?"
Chick on the intercom: "What?"
Me: "You said the machine broke. What did the machine break?"
Chick on the intercom: "The machine ain't operatin' at this moment."
Me: "Thank you."

 

[Fart Knocker]

people trying to bring non-service dogs into restaurants.

Me:"Ma'am, the health department doesn't allow us to have dogs in the establishments."
Her: "You must not like dogs!"
Me: "We can be fined a significant amount for allowing dogs in the store."\
Her: "He's a service dog."
Me: "Ma'am he's a poodle wearing a sweater."
Her: (storms out)

 

[Yinny]

I used to hate when customers would ask for personal assistance picking out the free panties (at VS). Like, uhhh, how about no.

And when they used to make us push the credit cards, I was good at it but felt bad.

There was mad fukkery there though, one of the managers apparently used to run through a lot of the yonug chicks there. His old ass tried to step to me I was like nah nygga. There is a cutie who was on the floor with me all the time, I should've gave him my number.

 

[BrothaZay]

When people ask where something is at, and you go back and find someone who works in that department to help them.
You come out and they find it themselves;
THem-"oh nvm i found it, it was right here lol(2 feet away)

 

[DaylitoJames]

I hate the weekends because customers like to bring their WHOLE family to the store just to walk around just to look at stuff and maybe buy something, meanwhile their bad ass kids are just running around the store screaming and yelling and knocking everything down having all the staff looking like cause we giotta clean that shyt up.

Ghetto ass people are the worst... and I mean Tyler Perry levels of ghetto because they always want the most expensive ass products but never have the money... then they get mad at you for it being expensive:

Customer: I want a 60" smart tv but I only want to pay $400, where that at?

Me: That don't exist, we got these 60 inch smart tvs on sale right now for $1000

Customer: Why they cost that much?! My cousin got a tv from the pawn shop for half that price

Me: ...was it a smart tv?
Customer: Whats "smart"?
Me: So you want a smart tv but don't know what it does?
Customer: My cousin got one so I want one too, can I put down $100 on layaway?
Me:

 

[Ricky Church]

I can legit say reading some of these stories, just READING them, I'm getting irked a little bit, cause I know exactly what ya'll talkin' about.

you never realize how many weird or dumb people there is walking around freely in society until you work in an environment where you have to deal with strangers on a regular basis.