I agree with this.
Black women follow white women's lead.
If they see that a white woman values a Black man enough to be his wife, they then assume that he must be valuable. If she's willing to risk her standing among white men to love a Black man, said Black man must be valuable---that's their logic.
If the Black man does indeed turn out to be valuable, the Black woman lashes out, knowing that she missed out on a valuable man.
I hate that I'm agreeing with this.
But let's be real.
Aforementioned black women are more than likely wary of said black man because they've been done dirty by black men in the past.
It's less "Black men ain't shyt" and more "My guard is up" than you're saying.
Once black man turns out to be of quality (which they weren't going to uncover on their own due to their guard being up), hatred is the only response left. They're more angry at their judgment than they are that a brother they don't know married a white woman that they don't know.
To be succinct, this happens to everyone.