Just had a deep convo with my younger sister(is the c00nery really this bad?)

[Blackout]

This thread is specifically talking about beauty standards, specifically in the blk community, specifically between young blk men and young blk women.

Some have attached a bunch of different contexts to avoid a very real issue here which is that blks are negatively influenced by arbitrary color associations in the West.

Why do you think a lot of young blk women consider lighter-skinned blk men emasculated? Because light is associated with femininity.
So please address the topic at hand, which is that in our community, dark skin is more acceptable and desirable on a man than it is on a woman.
Never implied that overall it was a privilege.

Sometimes I think ya'll are embarrassed by this shyt so you seek to distract from the issue at hand or deny it even exists.

Meanwhile, I've heard similar complaints from lighter-skinned young blk men that blk girls aren't attracted to them. Same deal.

Light skin men may be seen as kinda feminine but they still have more opportunities than dark skin men to get women. Light skin babies are wanted by the specific black women who are self hating since they tend to focus on nonblack features in babies.

Being kinda feminine has never prevented men from getting women generally. There is a reason why some men who get a lot of women are classified as pretty boys. no homo

 

[⠝⠕⠏⠑]

Light skinned Black men are out here eating,,,,,,,Activist bae Jessie Williams and that ex con who became social media famous had Black women acting a fool

Which blk women? What ex-con? And not all light ones are. But yeah there are even a bunch of Internet memes insulting light skinned dudes. It's a bit of an undercurrent associating light skin with "pretty boys" and not being tough or masculine.

Also keep in mind I'm talking about the youth. Google team light skinned. Arbitrary color associations.

 

[Poitier]

You can have it

 

[Blackout]

Which blk women? What ex-con? And not all light ones are. But yeah there are even a bunch of Internet memes insulting light skinned dudes. It's a bit of an undercurrent associating light skin with "pretty boys" and not being tough or masculine.

Also keep in mind I'm talking about the youth. Google team light skinned. Arbitrary color associations.

Those memes and term pretty boy may joke around but when it comes to actual relations light skin men still have an edge because its not seen as something that most black women and especally the specific self hating black women run from.

Those with self hate arent restricted to only black men.

 

[⠝⠕⠏⠑]

Yes so u all take my point about lighter-skin being associated with feminity in men.

I was using it to draw a parallel to a similar but far more detrimental phenomenon that happens to blk women particularly darker-skinned blk women---they are associated with masculinity.

@philmonroe
I also don't really abide by whining because ur not going to be everybody's cup of tea. But I think what the OP is describing is far more nefarious than people simple expressing a preference. And it needs to be acknowledged and eliminated.

 

[⠝⠕⠏⠑]

Those memes and term pretty boy may joke around but when it comes to actual relations light skin men still have an edge.

Self hate isnt restricted to black men.

Nope but I would consider a chick not dating a light-skinned dude off stupid associations she has with light-skin on a man apart of self-hate, especially if she is light-skinned too which in some cases happens.

 

[Blackout]

Nope but I would consider a chick not dating a light-skinned dude off stupid associations she has with light-skin on a man apart of self-hate, especially if she is light-skinned too which in some cases happens.

You can deny it but Ive seen it in person especially with the terms good hair and pretty boy and Ive seen it coming from hanging around my lighter skin cousins and SOME black women being more focused on lighter skin babies and parents trying to make sure their sons dont get too dark while playing outside.

There was also a member here who pretended to be light skin yet he was dark skin and he expressed light skin like he wanted to be light skin badly as a recent and close example.

Then you have Charlemagne and Vybz Kartel with bleaching.

 

[3rdWorld]

Sad. But truth is that time will reveal all and fix everything. those stink ass fags will grow up in a few years and have to deal with proper racism from cops, judges, and prospective employers. School her now whilst she's still young so she knows what's up in this real world and she will survive just fine.
I've noticed that of your young and ill prepared and clueless about cacs you'll suffer as an adult.

 

[philmonroe]

Yes so u all take my point about lighter-skin being associated with feminity in men.

I was using it to draw a parallel to a similar but far more detrimental phenomenon that happens to blk women particularly darker-skinned blk women---they are associated with masculinity.

@philmonroe
I also don't really abide by whining because ur not going to be everybody's cup of tea. But I think what the OP is describing is far more nefarious than people simple expressing a preference. And it needs to be acknowledged and eliminated.

I get what your saying about light skin/dark skin but to me end of the day this stuff still comes down to dating stuff. I also agree that some dark skin women are associated with masculinity but I think that has to do moreso with looks than actual complexion and that's where cats sometimes unknowingly get caught up in the complexion game. Truth is if you look like that chick in the ghostbusters movie you going to get some dudes saying to look like a man but if you look like the dark skin chick off the old bet show lets stay together you're not going to get that from the majority of people. IMO that's not complexion that's looks.


I think what happened in the OP is regular shyt that when it happens to black girls we act more concerned about when this is pretty basic to me. People joked on me for being dark skin when I was younger but I looked at it as jokes (girls liking me didn't hurt either) cause it was things about them that I made fun of too. I do feel for younger people because most aren't going to deal with it like I did but most of what happened in the OP I can speak on myself. I just really think a lot of this comes down to dating options but people won't see it that way and its also easier to explain face to face than typing. End of the day a lot of stuff that goes down can either be traced to dating, money, and sex (which is kinda related to dating) IMO. I can't speak on people not talking to me over hair but that sounds strange. That part I'd like to hear both sides on. I just have a hard time believing someone stopped fukking with someone over hair even at a young age I'm sorry.

 

[Jimi Swagger]

This shyt is crazy man, sometimes i forget that the c00nery you see online is actually in real life. These young kids dont even give a fukk, they flat out say they dont fukk with darker/black women my family is on the lighter side too so these nikkas dont fukk with black women at all

Kids can be cruel and everyone gets picked on about something in high school. Surprised at how some of my most beautiful homegirls were hated on for no reason. Fat kids, hispanics, suburban kids, homos, whoever can get it.

OP, if I were you, I would tell my sister that the family loves her and most importantly to love herself. Don't seek outside validation, especially from crab ass nikkas whose opinions or influence doesn't matter. If harassment and physical altercations are involved, then handle it appropriately but words are just words. Go with where she is loved and appreciated, connect with people she vibes with. Everyone has a clique.

 

[pon]

Tell yo sister she is an ebony queen strait outta ebony magazine

 

[Unknown Poster]

We need more strong black role models represented in the media. But we all know who controls the media.

I don't know what happened to me but over the years I bask in the glory of my own black excellence.

I know I can be in a room of 50+ whites and everyone will be looking at me cause I'm not a goddamn clone like them.



they hate that I'm unique and they are not.



The day the black man and black woman recognize their true power will be the day society will NOT be prepared for.

 

[Unknown Poster]

sister is correct to feel depressed....black Americans a mental damaged and feel alot of hatred towards each other...and the thought of a "black community" is totally unrealistic

This country is terrible for black development.

we eventually grow up comparing ourselves to whites and feeling down cause we cant live or be seen like them and with the gender wars and dating out and inequality/history of slavery & oppression with wealth it creates a nightmare of self hatred.

 

[GrindtooFilthy]

We live in Texas

i hope yall live in houston

texas is ass state even though i wanna move to houston that's really the only place i'll stay

 

[twhatever]

I said this in another thread but teenage black boys in this generation are the biggest fukking c00ns some of the shyt they say in the barber shop I go to is it's even worse if they are from a majority white suburb I can't really blame them tho living in a system of white supremacy if your family and Grandparnets are color struck c00ns you will have the same mind set

What do they say in the barbershop? And the ones from the suburbs?

Damn I hate to agree with this but its true. Im even seeing this with my nephew.

But what do you expect tho. Black parents rarely talk to there kids about race and color. If your black child is learning that lesson through a tv screen they are gonna internalize that antiblackness that is literally everywhere. My kids will be too proud to be black.

What does your nephew do or say?