is it me or after u turn 25 life gets real, I feel like Im losing my mind

[Patriarch]

I think most of you are victims of American Exceptionalism. We are indoctrinated at a young age , and taught to believe we can achieve or become anything we want to be. When you buy into this system we become malcontented. Poor folk from all over the world come here each year in pursuit of the "American Dream" , this dream usually involves amassing large fortunes. In Britain , at one point , if your father was a butler , you'd happily accept this fate and take pride in it. In stratified societies like India , in the Caste system , not only do you accept your position in this lifetime , but you should also expect to be reincarnated in the same position next lifetime. We live our lives believing that nothing is out of the realm of possibility. If your neighbor has a new BMW , why cant you? Not saying there is anything wrong with this , but we're living in a constant state of "status anxiety"..

I think what most of us are craving is "meaning". I read once that people dont crave happiness , they crave meaning. A Buddhist Monk will set himself on fire if he believes it MEANS something(clearly the feeling of burning flesh is not a happy one). Some Ascetic people live depraved lives devoid of luxury because of what it MEANS. A Nun gives herself to GOD because of what it MEANS. I challenge all of you to give up your pursuit of material things and find out what drives your life. I studied Buddhism when I was younger because I found this was the only religion that rejected desire instead of using it as an incentive. With some religions , Heaven or Paradise is viewed as a place where you can have whatever you desire. I think the problem is desire , itself. Desire is like a fire , it just continues to burn and consume. I was 23 making nearly 50k a year (which is alot to people in the Midwest).. Now I'm 25 , and id be ok making 30k a year and living alot more modestly. I got a raise a few months back and thought this would make me happier..

 

[↓R↑LYB]

For all y'all nikkas at 25 feeling that pressure, get comfortable because it's coming again at 30, and it's even rougher

I'll give y'all nikkas the advice I wish someone shoulda gave me:

1. Stay in the gym and eat right. You don't wanna be come 30.
2. Making money should be your number 1 priority. The older you get, the more important how much you make becomes
3. Start learning how to save now. You have to get in the habit of saving for a rainy, because trust me it is coming
4. Start raising your standards on the bytches you deal with. Once you hit 30+ the idea of getting married and having kids is gonna hit you like and you don't wanna wife up a hood rat.
5. Make sure your credit straight. If it's not, starting cleaning that shyt up now. You don't wanna be 30+ in a hoopty renting a one bedroom apartment because you can't get a loan.
6. Take calculated risks. If a good opportunity comes your way, go for it. I moved out of state dolo without a single friend or family member for hundreds of miles and it was the best decision of my life.

I went through the same thing y'all nikkas went through at 25, so I'm just trying to give y'all the heads up what 30 gonna be looking like. I don't even wanna imagine how 40 is gonna be

 

[Patriarch]

2. Making money should be your number 1 priority. The older you get, the more important how much you make becomes

If you're 30+ and still thinking like this you haven't learned anything from life. Enjoy a miserable existence.

If MJ , Anna Nicole , Whitney Houston ,Heath Ledger , Cobain , Jett Jackson and the countless other Millionaires who felt hopeless would have followed this advice.

 

[Theraflu]

Oh yeah I definitely agree, I mean what's driven me has been wanting to accomplish certain goals and leave my mark, but they've never been long term. What triggered this was a traumatic experience I had, my father committed suicide and I developed a condition called suicide ideation.

That's a natural reaction and will make your life story and how you view the world and ultimately your life decisions more different to others. What most people fear most you accept : death. It will allow you to think outside the box. Most people today think inside the same box. The great thing about things like suicide idealisation, mental illness and general mindsets outside of the box is it creates genius you can see beyond the bullshyt and see life for all it really is. You will find this condition useful long term.

 

[↓R↑LYB]

I am 25 too and I feel the same way as you to a degree but I dont even have a job yet. Just finished school. I want to reach the millionaire status in the coming years(5-10) or at least be well on my way th ere, but I'm terrified b/c I don't know exactly what to do to get there. I used to believe that my degrees would help me get there then reality hit. Now I spend a lot of my time petrified without a single idea of what to do b/c if it isnt going to help me get to that millionaire goal and help contribute to changing the world, I am hesitant to do it. I always wonder b/c I hear the successful ppl talking about how they don't sleep b/c they are always grinding. I'm like what the hell are yall doing exactly that you are busy all the time. B/c I want to be that busy. I know the late nights b/c of school but everyday life, the only reason I stay up is b/c I am overanalyzing. Don't want to mess up at this age and regret it when I hit 35. Help me brehs

Breh the best advice I can give is to make a plan, and just keep grinding. If you don't have a plan, try to get around people who have already become successful and learn from them. Start going to networking events and charity fund raisers in your city. Shake hands, make friends, kiss babies, the whole 9.

You degree won't make you millions, but the knowledge/skills you learned in school or at your job you can potentially turn into a successful business. But you just have to think outside of the box and dream BIG. If you don't believe deep down in your ball sack that you're gonna be a millionaire, you'll never make it. Lie to yourself if you have to, but don't ever let that fire burn out

Spoiler

and if that don't work, get it the ski mask way

 

[Elle Driver]

That's a natural reaction and will make your life story and how you view the world and ultimately your life decisions more different to others. What most people fear most you accept : death. It will allow you to think outside the box. Most people today think inside the same box. The great thing about things like suicide idealisation, mental illness and general mindsets outside of the box is it creates genius you can see beyond the bullshyt and see life for all it really is. You will find this condition useful long term.

That maybe so for some people, for me, it can be crippling which is why I'd find it probably devastating to live beyond the age of 30.

 

[↓R↑LYB]

Is this nikka @bdizzle really crying like a bytch cuz he makes 200K a year?

I'm not crying, I'm just saying every time I get closer to where I want to be, I feel like my dreams get further away. I'm not gonna write out my whole life story on here, but all I'll say is it's a miracle I haven't gone insane and when I look at my pops and my 3 brothers and see how they turned out, I just thank God I was born last and didn't have to deal with the same amount of insanity that they went through. shyt's been years and I still have mad paranoia and can't trust anyone

 

[↓R↑LYB]

If you're 30+ and still thinking like this you haven't learned anything from life. Enjoy a miserable existence.

If MJ , Anna Nicole , Whitney Houston ,Heath Ledger , Cobain , Jett Jackson and the countless other Millionaires who felt hopeless would have followed this advice.

Breh, all of them people you named had deep demons. They didn't commit suicide because of their wealth, they killed their selves because they were already mentally anguished (which is a whole other topic).

At the end of the day, when you're 30 and your trying to start a family and make sure your kids are straight, the last thing you want on your mind as a man is I'm not sure if I can pay the rent/mortgage or put food on my kids table this month.

 

[Theraflu]

If you're 30+ and still thinking like this you haven't learned anything from life. Enjoy a miserable existence.

While I agree with all you said above , I don't see anything wrong with @bdizzle philosophy.

I agree with your thoughts and I'm also a follower of the teachings of Buddha and meditate however ultimately each man on each is allowed to pick what drives him and what he aspires to and if @bdizzle aspires to vast wealth, that's his personal goal and that's fine.

There's nothing wrong with the aim for material prosperity if that's truly what someone wants, same way there is nothing wrong with selling it all and living a simple life. It's just two different lifestyle which everyone must chose theirs.


Freedom, drive, democracy, capitalism and the desire for wealth if hard enough will eventually get them there. The achievement philosophy tooted by the likes of Napolean Hill and Andrew Carnegie are fine as long as that's what the men believe in.

Everyone will be driven by something different and if material wealth and possessions is one. That's completely fine.

 

[Patriarch]

Breh, all of them people you named had deep demons. They didn't commit suicide because of their wealth, they killed their selves because they were already mentally anguished (which is a whole other topic).

At the end of the day, when you're 30 and your trying to start a family and make sure your kids are straight, the last thing you want on your mind as a man is I'm not sure if I can pay the rent/mortgage or put food on my kids table this month.

When did they become this way? Why didn't they kill themselves before the money came? I'm not even trying to have this discussion , but I cant sit back and watch you confuse or conflate money with happiness or success. You gotta stop looking at the world though red , white and blue colored lenses. We have two totally different concepts of success. Id be happier making less money and actually being able to watch my kids grow , learn , and live life.. Life experiences and forging bonds would be more of a priority than "making more money".

While I agree with all you said above , I don't see anything wrong with @bdizzle philosophy.

I agree with your thoughts and I'm also a follower of the teachings of Buddha and meditate however ultimately each man on each is allowed to pick what drives him and what he aspires to and if @bdizzle aspires to vast wealth, that's his personal goal and that's fine.

There's nothing wrong with the aim for material prosperity if that's truly what someone wants, same way there is nothing wrong with selling it all and living a simple life. It's just two different lifestyle which everyone must chose theirs.


Freedom, drive, democracy, capitalism and the desire for wealth if hard enough will eventually get them there. The achievement philosophy tooted by the likes of Napolean Hill and Andrew Carnegie are fine as long as that's what the men believe in.

Everyone will be driven by something different and if material wealth and possessions is one. That's completely fine.

I strongly disagree. We cannot play GOD. It's foolish to believe you can "Pick" what drives your life. Money cannot drive anything.. The "things" that money buys can push you to focus on making more , but what would money even mean if it were not for the material "things" it gets you. If a woman devotes her life to helping rape victims because she was raped as a child , she did not "pick" this driving force. If a man devotes his life to cancer research after his mother died of breast cancer , he did not "pick" or choose this. Really dig deep and find out what drives your life.

 

[↓R↑LYB]

When did they become this way? Why didn't they kill themselves before the money came? I'm not even trying to have this discussion , but I cant sit back and watch you confuse or conflate money with happiness or success. You gotta stop looking at the world though red , white and blue colored lenses. We have two totally different concepts of success. Id be happier making less money and actually being able to watch my kids grown , learn , and live life.. Life experiences and forging bonds would be more of a priority than "making more money".

For one MJ got his ass beat from the time he was a little boy by his pops. Money doesn't create mental illness breh, broke people kill themselves all the time.

I strongly disagree. We cannot play GOD. It's foolish to believe you can "Pick" what drives your life. Money cannot drive anything.. The "things" that money buys can push you to focus on making more , but what would money even mean if it were not for the material "things" it gets you. If a woman devotes her life to helping rape victims because she was raped as a child , she did not "pick" this driving force. If a man devotes his life to cancer research after his mother died of breast cancer , he did not "pick" or choose this. Really dig deep and find out what drives your life.

This where you lose me breh, in some ways I feel like I am God. I'm the master of my own destiny so whether I become a failure or success, all I can do is look in the mirror.

 

[Theraflu]

That maybe so for some people, for me, it can be crippling which is why I'd find it probably devastating to live beyond the age of 30.

Did you ever go through the medication and therapy route after the trauma or are you carrying the PTS ? You remind me of my younger cousin, shes 21, she was a maths prodigy, extremely intelligent however plagued by the same thing. She found life and the concept of daily living pointless and also became fixated with suicide, had multiple attempts, would write pages and pages on this idealisation.

Reluctantly after it became too crippling she seeked help, now she is such a genius and incredible person to speak to, the years of suffering ultimately moulded her into such a great young woman.

Of course every person is different however it's a thought that this suffering might one day be the key to your genius.

 

[Grams]

I'm not crying, I'm just saying every time I get closer to where I want to be, I feel like my dreams get further away. I'm not gonna write out my whole life story on here, but all I'll say is it's a miracle I haven't gone insane and when I look at my pops and my 3 brothers and see how they turned out, I just thank God I was born last and didn't have to deal with the same amount of insanity that they went through. shyt's been years and I still have mad paranoia and can't trust anyone

I fux with you breh

 

[↓R↑LYB]

I fux with you breh

Appreciate it breh, like every one else I'm on a quest to find ultimate happiness.

 

[Patriarch]

For one MJ got his ass beat from the time he was a little boy by his pops. Money doesn't create mental illness breh, broke people kill themselves all the time.



This where you lose me breh, in some ways I feel like I am God. I'm the master of my own destiny so whether I become a failure or success, all I can do is look in the mirror.

But bruh , what you just said is making more money will make for a better life for you and your family. YOU said making money should be priority #1. What would money do if your son was born with a birth defect.. What if your daughter was born with autism? MJ had a very tough life , but using the coli logic , Money should have mitigated these issues. How many of you would trade getting your ass beat for 15 years , for billions of dollars? That money didn't MEAN shyt to MJ .. His Father beating his ass MEANT alot. I think you may be missing the point here. I think we are all GODS in some way , but wealth dont buy health. I'm sure Steve Jobs felt very godlike , also-- Until he was touched by the hand of GOD.

If you gauge and measure your life based on how much money and material possessions you have , what happens when you lose it all? What else is there to live for?