I am now single man, its been a minute, how's the dating scene

theGoldmangod

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Long story short, dude about 50 and divorced with no kids. Pulled this fine ass sista in her 30s who was down for him. He said they had perfect chemistry, p*ssy/head was fire, submissive, good family, basically the perfect broad for him. They got into some kinda argument about her spending money in the relationship. I really think it was just some insecurity shyt on his part because he has the bread to take care of her, but with the age gap he didn't wanna feel like he was getting used. So basically he stopped treating her and courting her and shyt. Eventually I think she felt that he was trying to play her like a jumpoff and she left. nikka has since went through waves of trying to get her back over the holiday season, to fukking hoes off apps, to whining about her and making the rest of the friend group uncomfortable af.

Its wild to me because dude basically blew up his relationship over insecurities and likely missed out on the chick of his dreams. Now he out here pathetic, spending just as much if not more money taking hoes out on apps to smash than he prob was with his girl. My point is, nikkas gotta measure which flaws and disagreements and shyt are actually manageable. You can get p*ssy easily if you're a high caliber man, but from everything I've seen wifey types are hard to come by. Don't fukk it up being too much in your own head and sabotage your own shyt.
 

AtomicUse

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Long story short, dude about 50 and divorced with no kids. Pulled this fine ass sista in her 30s who was down for him. He said they had perfect chemistry, p*ssy/head was fire, submissive, good family, basically the perfect broad for him. They got into some kinda argument about her spending money in the relationship. I really think it was just some insecurity shyt on his part because he has the bread to take care of her, but with the age gap he didn't wanna feel like he was getting used. So basically he stopped treating her and courting her and shyt. Eventually I think she felt that he was trying to play her like a jumpoff and she left. nikka has since went through waves of trying to get her back over the holiday season, to fukking hoes off apps, to whining about her and making the rest of the friend group uncomfortable af.

Its wild to me because dude basically blew up his relationship over insecurities and likely missed out on the chick of his dreams. Now he out here pathetic, spending just as much if not more money taking hoes out on apps to smash than he prob was with his girl. My point is, nikkas gotta measure which flaws and disagreements and shyt are actually manageable. You can get p*ssy easily if you're a high caliber man, but from everything I've seen wifey types are hard to come by. Don't fukk it up being too much in your own head and sabotage your own shyt.
Sounds like he was getting taken for a ride and he listened to his intuition, but he misses the idea of him possibly being wrong about her. But, he’s 50. He know if someone using him for a check or not, so he made the choice.

If he suffered in silence I don’t think y’all would care as much, which is why men usually stfu about personal problems, nobody wanna hear that bullshyt. :pachaha:
 

AtomicUse

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Well we met before we actually started dating cause we were in the same black professional circles. So I was kinda just plotting on her from afar for a couple years while fukking hoes. Started dating seriously at 33, we was married by 35.
Why wasn’t she swooped up by one of the other black professionals in your circle, while you were out running through broads? :jbhmm:

33 kind of late to not have any prospects on the line.
 

Sleepy Floyd

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Long story short, dude about 50 and divorced with no kids. Pulled this fine ass sista in her 30s who was down for him. He said they had perfect chemistry, p*ssy/head was fire, submissive, good family, basically the perfect broad for him. They got into some kinda argument about her spending money in the relationship. I really think it was just some insecurity shyt on his part because he has the bread to take care of her, but with the age gap he didn't wanna feel like he was getting used. So basically he stopped treating her and courting her and shyt. Eventually I think she felt that he was trying to play her like a jumpoff and she left. nikka has since went through waves of trying to get her back over the holiday season, to fukking hoes off apps, to whining about her and making the rest of the friend group uncomfortable af.

Its wild to me because dude basically blew up his relationship over insecurities and likely missed out on the chick of his dreams. Now he out here pathetic, spending just as much if not more money taking hoes out on apps to smash than he prob was with his girl. My point is, nikkas gotta measure which flaws and disagreements and shyt are actually manageable. You can get p*ssy easily if you're a high caliber man, but from everything I've seen wifey types are hard to come by. Don't fukk it up being too much in your own head and sabotage your own shyt.
How is this chick the blueprint if she just spending all his money?
:pachaha:
 

theGoldmangod

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Sounds like he was getting taken for a ride and he listened to his intuition, but he misses the idea of him possibly being wrong about her. But, he’s 50. He know if someone using him for a check or not, so he made the choice.

If he suffered in silence I don’t think y’all would care as much, which is why men usually stfu about personal problems, nobody wanna hear that bullshyt. :pachaha:
A grown ass man who knows he was getting taken for a ride isn't crying about the shyt months later :comeon: Son blew it and he knows it.

Why wasn’t she swooped up by one of the other black professionals in your circle, while you were out running through broads? :jbhmm:

33 kind of late to not have any prospects on the line.
I was 33, she 28.

How long you been with your wife/girl breh?
 

theGoldmangod

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How is this chick the blueprint if she just spending all his money?
:pachaha:
Didn't say that shyt anywhere in my post like that but you got it breh.
Not about to go back and forth to let you nikkas use my post to craft shyt to make yourselves feel better about your own present/past situations :pachaha:
 

V Skyye

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Didn't say that shyt anywhere in my post like that but you got it breh.
Not about to go back and forth to let you nikkas use my post to craft shyt to make yourselves feel better about your own present/past situations :pachaha:
I think this situation can go either way. And I say this as a married woman. I do think your friend was picking up that his girlfriend was willing to play a certain role as long as a certain amount of spending was involved. And then once he cut back she was out. I want to first say that I don't think either were wrong in this situation. But people have to realize that many relationships are transactional and age gap relationships have a higher chance of being transactional. Older men often lead with money because they know it's the only way to get a younger fine woman on the hook and willing to play ball. But their egos and self-esteem tear away because deep down everyone wants someone who loves them for them and not for what they can provide.

But now he's single and realizing that the only way he can replace her is by spending money. And now he's spending for a possibility (not a guarantee) of what he had in the past. So he's realizing if he was going to have to spend anyway, he should have just stayed with the woman he had.

I may be misreading because of course you know way more context of the situation. But what he was feeling may have been very real.
 

SNG

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Women who usually push for marriage and kids turn out to be ain't shyt. The man who marries her will be in for some hell

The good are the ones who don't care about a piece of paper or ceremony.
Most women that value themselves and want a family want to be married. The ones who don’t care about a piece of paper or ceremony a lot of them end up as baby mamas.

Now I’m not saying you should do a big ceremony but if you plan on being with the woman for life then marriage shouldnt be a big deal if she values that.
 
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theGoldmangod

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I think this situation can go either way. And I say this as a married woman. I do think your friend was picking up that his girlfriend was willing to play a certain role as long as a certain amount of spending was involved. And then once he cut back she was out. I want to first say that I don't think either were wrong in this situation. But people have to realize that many relationships are transactional and age gap relationships have a higher chance of being transactional. Older men often lead with money because they know it's the only way to get a younger fine woman on the hook and willing to play ball. But their egos and self-esteem tear away because deep down everyone wants someone who loves them for them and not for what they can provide.

But now he's single and realizing that the only way he can replace her is by spending money. And now he's spending for a possibility (not a guarantee) of what he had in the past. So he's realizing if he was going to have to spend anyway, he should have just stayed with the woman he had.

I may be misreading because of course you know way more context of the situation. But what he was feeling may have been very real.
:ehh: I'm 99% sure what I'm saying is accurate, since dude has said a lot of their time was spent just chilling in the crib and she was cool with that. Only thing I can think of is he said he surprised her and paid a bill for her once. But even then he said she tried to slide the money back to him (he refused). I really think she had genuine love for dude, just expected him to be a provider, which like you said is the case in a lot of the age gap relationships. I think son pulled back because he had insecurities about being used, and when he pulled back she started to feel insecure like he was treating her like a jumpoff. But your point is taken in general though.

Maybe I been out the game too long, but as long as my wife was doing shyt like cooking for me, making sure my spot was straight, buying me shyt I like every now and again, giving me peace, and fukking when I want, and showing appreciation I wasn't tripping off her not paying for dinners, transportation, and shyt like that. But I was raised old school so I'm traditional by today's standards and can afford to be.

Maybe I'm :flabbynsick: now though, and you gotta pocket watch your girl to make sure she's really, truly down or whatever. I'm cool on that. Not trying to rub it in to the brehs struggling, but I rather be at home with my wife and kids than out in the streets dealing with what that nikka is now. That's why I advise to be careful about fumbling an overall good one, but every man has to make his own choices and live with them.
 

V Skyye

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:ehh: I'm 99% sure what I'm saying is accurate, since dude has said a lot of their time was spent just chilling in the crib and she was cool with that. Only thing I can think of is he said he surprised her and paid a bill for her once. But even then he said she tried to slide the money back to him (he refused). I really think she had genuine love for dude, just expected him to be a provider, which like you said is the case in a lot of the age gap relationships. I think son pulled back because he had insecurities about being used, and when he pulled back she started to feel insecure like he was treating her like a jumpoff. But your point is taken in general though.

Maybe I been out the game too long, but as long as my wife was doing shyt like cooking for me, making sure my spot was straight, buying me shyt I like every now and again, giving me peace, and fukking when I want, and showing appreciation I wasn't tripping off her not paying for dinners, transportation, and shyt like that. But I was raised old school so I'm traditional by today's standards and can afford to be.

Maybe I'm :flabbynsick: now though, and you gotta pocket watch your girl to make sure she's really, truly down or whatever. I'm cool on that. Not trying to rub it in to the brehs struggling, but I rather be at home with my wife and kids than out in the streets dealing with what that nikka is now. That's why I advise to be careful about fumbling an overall good one, but every man has to make his own choices and live with them.
Ok. Well going by this post and how he seemed to explicitly describe their sexual life, it seems that she was being treated as a jump off. So good for her for walking away from that situation. Men who describe their women like that to their friends are typically not serious about them.
 

DJ Paul's Arm

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:ehh: I'm 99% sure what I'm saying is accurate, since dude has said a lot of their time was spent just chilling in the crib and she was cool with that. Only thing I can think of is he said he surprised her and paid a bill for her once. But even then he said she tried to slide the money back to him (he refused). I really think she had genuine love for dude, just expected him to be a provider, which like you said is the case in a lot of the age gap relationships. I think son pulled back because he had insecurities about being used, and when he pulled back she started to feel insecure like he was treating her like a jumpoff. But your point is taken in general though.

Maybe I been out the game too long, but as long as my wife was doing shyt like cooking for me, making sure my spot was straight, buying me shyt I like every now and again, giving me peace, and fukking when I want, and showing appreciation I wasn't tripping off her not paying for dinners, transportation, and shyt like that. But I was raised old school so I'm traditional by today's standards and can afford to be.

Maybe I'm :flabbynsick: now though, and you gotta pocket watch your girl to make sure she's really, truly down or whatever. I'm cool on that. Not trying to rub it in to the brehs struggling, but I rather be at home with my wife and kids than out in the streets dealing with what that nikka is now. That's why I advise to be careful about fumbling an overall good one, but every man has to make his own choices and live with them.

Are you sure it’s your friend and not you? Hmmmmmmm?

:sas2:
 

Sleepy Floyd

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Didn't say that shyt anywhere in my post like that but you got it breh.
Not about to go back and forth to let you nikkas use my post to craft shyt to make yourselves feel better about your own present/past situations :pachaha:

nikkas gotta stop fumbling good women. Some of yall already know the story about my homeboy that fumbled the literal blueprint of a chick nikkas say they want on here, and its only gotten worse for him since.

This u?
 

Ohene

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Long story short, dude about 50 and divorced with no kids. Pulled this fine ass sista in her 30s who was down for him. He said they had perfect chemistry, p*ssy/head was fire, submissive, good family, basically the perfect broad for him. They got into some kinda argument about her spending money in the relationship. I really think it was just some insecurity shyt on his part because he has the bread to take care of her, but with the age gap he didn't wanna feel like he was getting used. So basically he stopped treating her and courting her and shyt. Eventually I think she felt that he was trying to play her like a jumpoff and she left. nikka has since went through waves of trying to get her back over the holiday season, to fukking hoes off apps, to whining about her and making the rest of the friend group uncomfortable af.

Its wild to me because dude basically blew up his relationship over insecurities and likely missed out on the chick of his dreams. Now he out here pathetic, spending just as much if not more money taking hoes out on apps to smash than he prob was with his girl. My point is, nikkas gotta measure which flaws and disagreements and shyt are actually manageable. You can get p*ssy easily if you're a high caliber man, but from everything I've seen wifey types are hard to come by. Don't fukk it up being too much in your own head and sabotage your own shyt.
Hmm i feel you
Thanks for sharing
 

JLova

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If you love this girl u better man up and wife her before she lets another nikka in between those legs. If you didn’t see yourself marrying her, that’s one thing. But the reasons you gave so far are dumb.

However if your spirit is having doubts about her, you should investigate that. Question the source of this paranoia.

Sounds like a decent woman who knows her value.

No woman worth a shyt would be waiting around for you to start adulting

Maybe you need to get your shyt together. If she’s a good woman that’s right for you u should hold on to her. Not easy to find.
 
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