You have gotta be fukking trolling breh ain't Noone this dense.
Let’s do it then breh.
Let’s jump down the rabbit whole of your ridiculous scenario of this poor rural PlayStation fan without internet access.
Young bubba the swamp dude doesn’t have the internet so he learns of the PS5s existence through watching connan on late night tv. He gets the release date and again doesn’t have the internet so he can’t preorder it, so he packs up his pick up truck and makes the long drive to sit outside GameStop a day early to make sure he gets his PS5.
Gets home with his system pops in Spiderman plays for a while then Crash, reboots plays for a while Spiderman falls through the floor, whole system shuts off tells him he needs to reformat his hard drive. He does it, plays again, gets the same result.
Once again he doesn’t have the internet so he can’t check online to see any troubleshooting ideas, so he calls Sony customer service. And guess what they tell him.
“We sorry young Jethrow you have to log in and download the latest updates for your game to work correctly”
And you somehow think it was Microsoft trying to “fukk” him by being honest and saying “modern gaming just isn’t for you”