Discuss: issues with your parents

[DarkHorse23]

@Still Ill FC My mother is a piece of shyt... and because of her i have serious problems as an adult..

Ill never get married or have kids cause im simply cannot keep women longer then 3 months.. u know how they say never mess with a man who has mother issues? Well im.living proof that that statement is 100% factual...

Where to begin:

~the reason im even born is because my mom had an affair with a married man who had two kids of his own

~my mother moved me from Baltimore to a suburb in DC where i was forced to go to private school but she valued money more then she did a relationship with me and my sister...

She worked 3 jobs round the clock to afford this smal ass 3 bedroom 1 bathroom house in the suburbs and when she realized that shyt still couldn't cover her bills she married THE WORST STEP FATHER i could have ever had from South Carolina


My mother was illiterate growing up which i feel bad about but she in general doesn't have any sense about her and she genuinely doesn't understand how things work..

For instance she made me go to these private schools thinking that a school would make me smart student..... but nobody at home never took time to help me with any of my work or how me stuff (she was working 3 jobs) ..she literally thought the school would do everything because she paid money to tell

I used to have horrible grades in.school but you know why ??? Because i was illegally blind and i didnt get my first pair of glasses until about the 7th grade...

Can you imagine you own.mother doesnt even recognize that her son cant see shyt for 13 years.. but yet im supposed to be making straight a's simply bc i attend a private school..

Till this very day i remember putting on my first paor of glasses and thinking to myself "Dam this is how the world looks" i was literally in awe.

My mother never groomed me (i had like1 hair cut a year ) and used to get teased like crazy for it...she used to pick me up in the shytyest broke down car ever (everyone at this school had like an audi or better ) and she genuinely just didnt show me any kinda love growing up...

I could go on and on but bottom line is when i tell you this lady ruined my life i mean it with all my heart...

She sent me to a boarding school in.south Carolina for disobedient kids and before i went to this school.. i never had a fight.. never did a drug.. never drank.. partied.. i mean nothing at all,. I was just sick of her ass

She used to call me ugly.. tell me im possesssed.. tell me to go and die...

But yet im supposed to respect her and make straight A's and be some kinda model son... man fukk her...

When she sent me to that boarding school in SC. for 2 years with a BUNCH pf troubled kids.... With no phone call ..no care package.. my life really went down hill at that point... i really wish i wasnt here sometimes.. u just dont know...

So dont worry op.. people like me have it worse then you.. im.nkt saying ur mom didnt have faults but if she kept you under her roof for 18 years.. i feel like that at least the basic she could have done.. and i never got the basics from mine.

Bruh. Im so sorry, you deserved better. This is an excellent thread, going return later and talk about my parents

 

[Just like bruddas]

My father was too strict at times. Never no real middle ground with him, it was either you're right or wrong. Real black and white.

 

[ReggieFlare]

I have a pretty good relationship with both of my parents, but things weren't always gravy and they still annoy me in different ways.

Until I was about 16 I lived with my mom, and the main issue I had with her is that she had a tendency to be selfish and unreasonable. Whenever I would try to bring reason into certain situations, she would always pull the "I'm your mom, you have to respect me and do what I say" card. This built a lot of resentment within me to the point that I decided I wanted to go live with my pops. TBH this was probably the best thing for our relationship because if I had remained with her I probably would have snapped at some point. Funny thing is before I moved in with my pops I always used to tell her that I would rather live with him and she would say go right ahead! Once I actually did it though, she started getting all emotional and talking about how much she missed having me around the house

Me and my pops have been cool forever pretty much. Growing up I looked up to him and he was much more understanding than my mom. I never really had many issues with him until college, where I confessed to him I no longer identified as Christian. This was the beginning of a pretty big rift between us; I had always considered me and my dad to be similar when I was younger but the older I got the more I began to see the differences between us. It got to a point where he would ask me every now and then whether I hated him or what my thoughts were about him. To this day I still live with him and the things that probably annoy me the most is that he feels as if he still needs to to tell me shyt I already know or plan to do, like getting an oil change for my car, cleaning my room, paying bills, checking mail, etc....mostly little stuff, but it's the little things that bother me the most

 

[GrindtooFilthy]

I don't think she's a bad mom. I think she treated me like a chore like taking out the trash or washing the car. I had a good childhood though. I had to tell her to say I love you. She used to just hang up on me or say nothing when I left. I feel guilty when I ignore her. I owe her my life.

it sounds like you have stockholm syndrome

 

[GoGetMyDamnBelt_]

Thats why I want no beef with you. I've always gotten the vibe you don't take NO shyt from NO body. Lol, not even your momma. I do like your style though. Apex predators recognize apex predators.

I used to say I didn't need a dad. But at 26 with options, it'd be nice to have a man's guidance. I thought being a man was being super human. Successful. Fit. A winner. I'm learning it's more than that.

A man's energy would have been nice growing up. I think my bro and I were in a constant power struggle. We're both alpha males. I was clearly more talented at everything. And he's no slouch. He's a genius I think. I worked hard at everything. It came natural to him. Our competition got out of control when I was teenager. We both have sent each other to the hospital. I decided to dead the beef by avoiding him and never speaking to him.

My mom favoring him was naive of her and I'm seeing the damage done now that I'm trying to connect with people on a deeper level. I act how I think a normal person should in emotional situations or I retract. Im not a sociopath because I can feel things. It's just overwhelming and very uncomfortable.

My friends call me Don Draper because I'm distant. When I like a girl it pisses me off and I fall back. That's not healthy. Falling in love was the best and worst thing to happen to me though. It taught me about accountability.

I was running game on two girls who were best friends. I was trying to have a 3some with. fukked around and fell in love accidently. I wasn't living right. I was highly manipulative with women. I was fukking her bestie and was in love with her bestie while dating her too. I only talked to her to piss off the one I loved.

I remember planning it out and telling my friends and getting their approval. I was not living right. She was so nice. She would feed me. Ask me about about my feelings. Didn't care what I had. What I did to her ain't right. I didn't cheat on her. But I wasn't emotionally available. I see that now.

She got hella dark and morbid after we lost our first pregnancy. Which I think she lost because she was sad because when she told me she was pregnant I got up and walked out the room. Then I started drinking and didn't say anything for hella long. She told me during our breakup argument my response sounded like a formal email and there was no emotion in my eyes.

That's exactly how my mom is. It scares me a lot. Something isn't functioning inside me and I think I learned it from my mom and dealing with my family. I don't like it. Some times the kids I nanny for, who I've taught to read and play soccer, I love these boys, they told me I shut off and it's scary because I'm like a robot. Weird thing is kids is are freakishly drawn to me. And I understand them. I'd love to have kids.I think I'll ruin them though.

Damn. People don't understand that their traits, their personality all comes from home. Because of the abuse, I grew up having communication issues in my relationships. With some that's worth it, I really do try but it feels like pulling teeth. I feel like I'll get attacked saying anything that's on my mind so I just shut down. Sometimes I just can't help it. My in-the-process ex-husband mention plenty of times how much my communication is fukked up. I just hate when people try to get in my head, I just don't want to share my crazy with anyone.
And before him, I was sexually awkward. But that's another story to tell..

I'm sorry you had to go thru that, hun and I believe you'd be a great father.

 

[prime]

My mom has trust/control/anxiety issues. She worries so much, she feels she has control things and people because she thinks she knows best.


.

This is my dad 100 percent he still sees me and my younger sister as teenagers and my baby brother who is 18 as a kid and he takes everything personal like you can't have a different opinion Or out look on life if you do he feels like you hate him My mom is cool tho she has her moments but she is like my best friend no lie

 

[GrindtooFilthy]

This exactly how I feel.

I always thought I hated my mom but I now know I just dislike her as a person. The only kind of respect I have for her is for birthing me. I don't love her nor do I hate her.

Since I was 4 I been sexually abused. Molested by my cousin, she was 16. It went on till I was about 6. She use to do this sick shyt too where she had me and my older brother touch on eachother. He was 5 to my 4. We never spoke about it. We were scared of my cousin.

It picked back up from 8 on up by multiple men who somehow or way knew my mother. Those times, I told my mom but nothing was ever done. That's when I developed depression disorder. When I was 9 this one man, married man at that, that she was sleeping with was touching me. But it was different from the others. Unlike the others, he was doing it inside my clothes. Fingering, rubbing my developing breasts, kissing me on the mouth, walking in on me when i take my baths. Told my mom, she told me whenever he comes around to go to my room or don't wear short things around the house. I don't know if my mom said anything to him or not but one night he took it a step further.. lost my virginity to him at 9. This time, instead of telling my mom, I told his wife. He disappeared after that.

I was 12, her baby daddy touched me and she kicked me out and sent me to my grandmother until I was 14 where she moved to Orlando. I had no choice but to go. I've dealt with sexually abuse, plenty of physical and verbal. When it comes to communication, I shut down. If someone is worth it, I try.

I've had a nasty grudge against her. I moved out her place at 16 when i graduated HS. From then till now, she calls me almost everyday and ends the phone calls with "I love you." You know how awkward it is when I can't say it back?

My mother is a woman who thinks she can't live without a man, whether they be pedophiles or rapists. She's a conniving, compulsive, liar. She's a disappointment. She's a joke of a parent. I try to have minimal contact with her but leave it up to her to reach out anyways.

Worst part of it all, she in denial. That depression disorder didn't go away. Now I'm on pills for anxiety and my doctor want to try antidepressants next. I thought it would help if I just air out the years worth of tension with my mom and discuss it. She told me, "let go and let God." She totally dismissed everything I said, everything I opened up to her about. That shyt crushed me.

I'll never have a stable, healthy relationship with my mom. I've now come to accept that.

after reading the second sentence i just wanna say you should seek psychiatric help, i'm not even remotely kidding when i say this

EDIT: i realized how harsh that sounds, i dont mean this in a condescending way it looks like you're a good person you should just seek out more to help yourself. mental health will always be a reoccurring problem in the community

 

[Demon]

why was this a problem?

i entered HS when my bro was still there and thats what i was known as by all his friends. he had a great rep so i'd be like yup

i had my own lane and friends so we all just started hanging out together. i never felt like i was in his "shadow" or anything. He made shyt a lot easier for me tbh.

my brother is 8 years my senior, and when i was young he always included me in his shyt and never made me feel left out..made me grow up quick but i love him for it.




my parents did everything right...instead my parents can be in here making a thread on me oh well, im 100% mature and responsible now...but got damn, did i ever give them grief

 

[FreddyCalhoun]

I was raised by a single mom and her sisters. shyt was wild. I remember sincerely hating my mom and my brother. I remember giving them looks that I hoped would cause them to burst into flames.

My mom adores my older brother. She told me in sixth grade she couldn't imagine me as an adult but she could imagine my brother as an adult. Id bring home straight A's and she didn't care. My brother didn't graduate high school and she gets excited about anything he does.

I remember graduating high school with honors and seeing all the families with signs for their kids and they got gifts and parties. I didn't even get a congratulations. I over achieved all of my life hoping my mom would say she's proud of me or approve of me. She never did.

My mom gave me a lot of gifts. I appreciate my education very much. But, I'm never satisfied with myself and it's been destructive in my life. I used to think I was fat. Even though I wasn't. I pushed my body to weigh 142 lbs, I'm 5'10 I was passing out all the time. My mom used to tell me I was fat.

My mom calls me to talk about my brother. It's never about me. It's always about him. I remember I was planning to have a baby. My girl was pregnant. We were so excited. I called my mom to tell her and she kept talking about my brother. So I never did. She lost the pregnancy. I wish I could have talked to my mom but again, it's never about me.

My brother tried to stab me to death with a knife. He's a lot bigger than me. I remember seeing blood on the wall and thinking he got me. I was screaming for my mom to call the cops and she didn't. I had to beat this man unconscious.

I still have a stab wound in my hand from where I blocked the knife with my palm. She was more concerned about the broken toilet and shower door he destroyed tossing me through them. Maybe it's because I'm adopted.

- I love My Mom

Find Jesus and Go get therapy now....!!!! You do not want to push these ill negative ways towards anyone else in your life.

 

[FaygoMI]

This is my dad 100 percent he still sees me and my younger sister as teenagers and my baby brother who is 18 as a kid and he takes everything personal like you can't have a different opinion Or out look on life if you do he feels like you hate him My mom is cool tho she has her moments but she is like my best friend no lie

Go watch them videos I posted, please

 

[TheNig]

Just patched things up with my mom about 3 yrs ago. She never knew the entire reason why I left and went to the Navy. All I remember is her being really annoyed with my choice. One reason why I left, and I told her this, is that my cousin had just been shot and I was just ready to get out of there. But another reason why I left is becuz I felt like she had put the church before me and my brother. I was doing all this shyt in school, sports, speech and debate, business law, all of this shyt. But everytime I would have an event, their was always something to do for the church. She did the same thing with my brother when he was going thru high school.

About three years ago, I was picking her up from church and she asked me about me again about leaving to go to the Navy and I finally told her the entire reason. Her feelings were hurt but I think she understood and I feel like she is tryan make up for time thru her grandchildren.

Me and my dad's relationship is strange. We got into it about two years ago and didn't talk for months. It wasn't until my uncle died that we started communicating again.

 

[Luken]

Bare emotions in here

 

[DIMES]

Find Jesus and Go get therapy now....!!!! You do not want to push these ill negative ways towards anyone else in your life.

How about find God, not Jesus?

Just a thought

 

[GrindtooFilthy]

heh i know i could be a better son but at the same time i don't want too, my parents never try to understand me and how i feel they think the have all the answers in the world. it's annoying when someone tells you something and they think their right but htey have no clue what is actually going on. i know there trying their best but i dont need them anymore, i've told my mom once that diploma comes in and i get that job im leaving the house


oh and i told them i'm not getting married and they're not getting grandkids, the look of anger they had

 

[Arris]

my mom and I can really get into it, we've calmed it down drastically the last couple years but when I was in highschool we were constantly butting heads

we kinda bring the worst out of eachother in arguments. I've never been as angry with another person as I have many times with my mother which is weird, like people and family would legit be like if they witnessed one of our more heated arguments cus we just dont show that at any other time.