Deep down I think I hate my mom, anyone else feel this way?

[Richard Wright]

One thing I have noticed working in Manhattan and being around people with 10x more money than the people I grew up around - these well off kids with both parents have parents who feel guilty they left them with a baby sitter and shyt, and will do anything to make the weekends or whatever they have together a good memory for the kid.

My mom has ms and was tired af or working on the weekend - so we don't have shyt that I look back fondly on like Disneyland trips and all that.

My mom gave me a moral Code and pretty much nothing else - it made me stronger but being too strong as a human being isn't the best thing in the world. When you see through society's bullshyt it's tough to buy into the mindless self indulgence people around you seem to be living for.

You either wish you were aborted or you don't. In personally glad to have made my mom proud as I stand here at 21, but I can't say the idea of returning to the energy of the universe and being in peace forever doesn't sound appealing to me.

 

[cyndaquil]

Plenty of big titty broads in these streets.

They just want a man that doesn't feel like he's less than any other man.

Rich or broke... a nikka ain't mad
Self-esteem will make a Regal ride like a Silver Seraph

@ben anderson

 

[Richard Wright]

I don't know if I'd outright erase my family from my memory if I could.... But, to keep it G..... I just thought about some shyt:


If I had just dropped onto Earth, on some teleport shyt, and never knew these nikkas, I'd prefer that. lol.


Then I can just make all new friends of my choosing.


This is how I feel at this point: If you not a positive in my life, you a negative. No neutrals.


Why even have a relationship with someone if you don't add some type of value to their life? This is what's fukked up with the world.


Life is too goddamn short to have "friends" or "family" that are voids.


I could talk bout this shyt forever.... But "family" is a joke in many instances.

I say all the time if I want a friend I will get a dog. These people don't care about me and I don't care about them. They use me I use them. The thing is people are often ignorant to the fact they are using me - I'm not ignorant to shyt. Or maybe I give them too much benefit of doubt.

 

[Kid McNamara]

I don't know if I'd outright erase my family from my memory if I could.... But, to keep it G..... I just thought about some shyt:


If I had just dropped onto Earth, on some teleport shyt, and never knew these nikkas, I'd prefer that. lol.


Then I can just make all new friends of my choosing.


This is how I feel at this point: If you not a positive in my life, you a negative. No neutrals.


Why even have a relationship with someone if you don't add some type of value to their life? This is what's fukked up with the world.


Life is too goddamn short to have "friends" or "family" that are voids.


I could talk bout this shyt forever.... But "family" is a joke in many instances.

You either build or destroy. You add value or you don't.

More importantly, in life, you're either building upward momentum or you're slowly spirally down. It's these little decisions that can really get us. It's the people we allow into our lives, the time we waste, the negative thoughts we allow to enter our minds.

Anyone in the way of my upward trajectory needs to be rolled over.

 

[Kid McNamara]

I say all the time if I want a friend I will get a dog. These people don't care about me and I don't care about them. They use me I use them. The thing is people are often ignorant to the fact they are using me - I'm not ignorant to shyt. Or maybe I give them too much benefit of doubt.

And there's nothing wrong with that. You get to be around people that bring value into your life and vice versa.

If they stop providing value, there is no reason to hang onto them. Most people do so out of a false sense of "loyalty" and out of loneliness.

 

[Richard Wright]

You either build or destroy. You add value or you don't.

More importantly, in life, you're either building upward momentum or you're slowly spirally down. It's these little decisions that can really get us. It's the people we allow into our lives, the time we waste, the negative thoughts we allow to enter our minds.

Anyone in the way of my upward trajectory needs to be rolled over.

You just earned yourself a place in my book of quotes

 

[Citi Trends]

in the black community your mother could diddle your butt and beat you with a sack of bricks everyday and it's "she yo mama she can do dat. das moms"
your father could be unsteady with jobs and he's a no good piece of shyt

in a decade nikkas will be telling draya's son she did the best for him

 

[Cloud Cloud]

And there's nothing wrong with that. You get to be around people that bring value into your life and vice versa.

If they stop providing value, there is no reason to hang onto them. Most people do so out of a false sense of "loyalty" and out of loneliness.

Here's where the fukked up part come in:

I'm black. The only thing I want is enough money that will lead to power.


The only way ANYONE can really help me, is to discuss business ideas, maybe do something together biz wise, or loan me some money (but again, I'm black..... loan? psshh).


So, this person of "value", in the black community... Is like a fukkin needle in a haystack... I've literally asked every nikka / fam member I've ever known to do business, and I get a look like a got bird shyt on my top lip.


Once you do find this person of value... It's going to take a while to know if you can trust em, and even then when you think you can, they might show you a bullshyt side you never knew..... (just experienced this shyt, smh)


This is a real cluster fukk and to me epitomizes the cycle of poverty and 4th class citizenship of the black community.


No excuses here tho.... I refuse to fail. I'll do shyt alone until I get enough money to have power, and then you can make motherfukkers fall in line better since you have cash up front.


This is the difference between whites and blacks: I couldn't find a paul allen if my life depended on it. Gates couldn't have started that shyt by himself.


Whites don't really wanna fukk with black people like that cus of stereotypes.


So at the end of the day ambitious blacks have an uphill battle so fukkin ridiculous it can feel insermountable....... But if you willing to make that *ultimate* sacrifice, it aint....

 

[ben anderson]

@ben anderson

wtf u tag me in this thread for

 

[cyndaquil]

wtf u tag me in this thread for

Dat nikka said the hos only want confidence

 

[Chelsea Bridge]

My mother annoys the hell out of me but I don't know what I would do without her. My dad doesn't annoy me nearly as much but I couldn't imagine my life without him either.

I feel blessed

 

[cyndaquil]

My mother annoys the hell out of me but I don't know what I would do without her. My dad doesn't annoy me nearly as much but I couldn't imagine my life without him either.

I feel blessed

U share that mother

 

[Chelsea Bridge]

U share that mother

You're right I do and with 5 other people too .


Now when are you going to share your sorrow?

 

[cyndaquil]

You're right I do and with 5 other people too .


Now when are you going to share your sorrow?

you say that it so nonchalantly "share my sorrow" lol

 

[Chelsea Bridge]

you say that it so nonchalantly "share my sorrow" lol

Lol I didn't mean to sound nonchalant but you gotta let it out eventually. How else can you start to heal?