the_FUTURE
Superstar
I agree with this.
Black men, vulnerability and depression.
- Thread starter Prynce
- Start date
I agree with this.
You'll live. We been living. Everybody got to deal with hurts, pains, inequality at some point, black folks especially. But turn those tears into sweat for carrying your families on your shoulders, your dreams on your shoulders, your faith on your shoulders. Don't let the bad get you down for there will always be hurts. Don't let depression or anxiety or stress or unfairness or trauma torture you. Black men you are loved.
True.
Lots of "well actually" folks can't help themselves when they see an opportunity to interject their own insecurities/ideals/experiences on others in a fact rather than opinion kind of way.
Definitely need a therapy forum with strong modding
up in here
Superstar
I struggle to talk about my feelings. It's easy to say I'm pissed off or fed up, but it's hard to say I'm hurt.
I dont let people get close very often. I avoid conflict so much I mostly stay to myself these days. I think I also do it cause I don't want to ever need someone. I try to do things all on my own. I hate asking for anything.
I feel like I gotta be the rock for my family but truth is I'm just tryna keep from losing it sometimes.
I dont let people get close very often. I avoid conflict so much I mostly stay to myself these days. I think I also do it cause I don't want to ever need someone. I try to do things all on my own. I hate asking for anything.
I feel like I gotta be the rock for my family but truth is I'm just tryna keep from losing it sometimes.
I disagree with the idea that there's no time for us to get in touch with our emotions. We seem to be able to find time for other things that don't really provide us with much benefit such as sinking countless hours into videos games.
Talking about our emotions can keep us away from the edge. take Kent for example, he's found thousands of hours to not only talk about his emotions but make recordings and share those videos with others which is incredibly brave given all of the negativity he receives every time he's posts a video. These are documented records he can look back on when he's in a better place and use to accurately measure how much progress he's made in his journey.
In regards to Black men being expected to take on seemingly unrealistic burdens, I believe we owe it to our ancestors to do these things, even if we don't receive praise or thanks, we need to learn to take joy in doing things because they are the right things to do, otherwise, you're only setting yourself up for failure in anchoring the quality of work you produce to the amount of praise you receive.
We're men, Black men, and many of us have completely dropped the ball because this country has spoiled us. We want to simultaneously call ourselves men and incessantly complain about how hard it is to be a man because men from other groups don't have it as hard as us. I say we're spoiled because even in our complaints against the system of white supremacy, we know that we can still rely on this very system to keep us from starving even if it's relying on this system by proxy.
For example, there are plenty Black men illegally living with Black women who are on the Section 8 program, for many of these men it means the difference between having a roof over there heads and homelessness. Some of these men even have jobs but don't net enough income to afford housing as their entire check is going to contributing to bills, and keeping gas in the car.
This is quite the dilemma, hating the system you live under and also knowing that your immediate situation would be much worse without the system. This dilemma is the reason Black people have such a difficult time fighting against the system, it has spoiled us.
CrownHeights
Superstar
Real talk. Ma dukes died when I was real young and I don't know how, but my pops raised us badass kids all by himself. I get all choked up thinking about it
The only thing that struck me as odd as a kid/teenager
was that girls would come from the same community and conditions, even live on the same street
and will expect all the dudes around her to be "balling" and rock expensive shyt
other than that I never got the depression and emotional shyt
it made my skin tougher and prepared me for the corporate world
was that girls would come from the same community and conditions, even live on the same street
and will expect all the dudes around her to be "balling" and rock expensive shyt
other than that I never got the depression and emotional shyt
it made my skin tougher and prepared me for the corporate world
Me too. Only platonically tho
Concerned Citizen
HxH, LoSH 5YG, WW, DS9, IYKYK
I feel you OP great post. Been going through some personal struggles myself for a while now trying to provide the best upbringing I can for my kids while truly realizing how lacking my own upbringing was in a lot of ways and the negative effects of society's expectations on black boys and men and dealing with anxiety and depression.
The best thing I can say is surround yourself with quality men and women who're true friends that you can interact with on various levels. These people are few but way more valuable than having a lot of associates that you can only have the same shallow conversations with.
The best thing I can say is surround yourself with quality men and women who're true friends that you can interact with on various levels. These people are few but way more valuable than having a lot of associates that you can only have the same shallow conversations with.
Vodun
All Star
Breh I Co signed that example
We had a team meeting today and they asked us what do we enjoy doing on Saturday morning. I told them reading they all freaked out. One person even said YOU READ?? I looked her like
What you think I do all day rolled bluts and watch bet videos
Being black and dumb is probably the worst thing imaginable. Smart brothers must be raised to a higher standard, not clowned at. Im pretty dumb myself. It upsets me that Im too dumb to know math, social interaction, to drive a car, or how society works. Without those things, I not sue I can become an independent adult. Just some slow socially awkward loser with nothing more going on for himself besides some min wage job.
Great point, I'd wager that there's a degree of false equivalency in comparing the calming effects of smoking and drug usage with it however since it is a proven fact that those things are a detriment to your physical well-being. Nonetheless, the status quo of bottling shyt up doesn't work. A girl who I consider close is literally the one person who I know that I can speak to on my shyt going on in life. She empathizes with shyt I'm dealing with and sees how me bottling it up affects me negatively.
As a consequence of her being someone I enjoy being with, I always have to check myself before I get too attached or reliant on her input or knowing everything because as you pointed out, I don't want to put her in the uncomfortable position of always having to hear some shyt I'm going through because she has a life too (
).I'd wager that there's a certifiable balance to develop between sharing and internalizing one's issues, being at one extreme of the spectrum is not a healthy option however.
To @Prynce the premise of this thread was brought up in 2015 by @Doobie Doo in this thread: REALEST EBRO RANT on Hot97: No One Cares About The Plight Of Men where Ebro basically echos the sentiment in this thread as it pertains to a man's sense of respobnsibility while not being given the opportunity to be human and all of the vulnerabilities that comes with being human. shyt I think in the video from that thread (see below) Ebro asked his co-host if she would stay with her husband of some years (5..8? I don't remember) if he lost his job, and she basically said that nikka would get like 3-6 months before she's gone
. Of course she backtracked but her Freudian slip already outed her.Just random $0.02.
does it make a difference? what if she was white, would you be more open or less open ?[/QUOTE]
A black therapist may understand "black issues" more being as they have similar experiences. Its like how can one expect Trump to truly understand the struggle and poor and working class when he never had to experience that and walk in others shoes.
A black therapist may understand "black issues" more being as they have similar experiences. Its like how can one expect Trump to truly understand the struggle and poor and working class when he never had to experience that and walk in others shoes.