Black Men need to "Man-Up", mentor these lil nigglets out chea.

[↓R↑LYB]

Single black mothers are some of the most shamed people in our society. How do they react to that shame?

By saying " I'm proud to be a single black mom, and I'm gonna teach my kids the same.

Shame is not the answer

They're not being shamed breh. Bill Cosby is the only person I can remember who actually said something negative towards single mothers and he was crucified for it.

 

[concise]

Yes it's looked at negatively. I've never heard anyone say they want to grow up and raise a child on their own.

So how do you presume we fix the problem. If kids need both parents, and they don't have both parents, what can I do to help the situation.

I'm saying regardless of if the bytch was mother teresa or the biggest hoe on the block, it's every adult's responsibility to make sure they pick a proper mate. If you are irresponsible and get a fukked up individual pregnant, you're to blame.

I don't play the whole "I'm a victim" game. You're an adult, you and only you made the fukked up decision to sleep with someone of poor character, and you're the one that's gonna have to deal with the mistakes you've made. Not me.

How exactly do you propose we "punish" single moms?

How exactly do you propose we force the fathers back into the picture?

What exactly are you doing to this end beyond posting on the Coli about it?

How is this a better way to spend time than influencing these kids to not make the mistakes their parents made?

So I should ignore the people who made the problem, and tell those who have nothing to do with it to clean up the mess?

What's beneficial for society AND the kids is that they live in a household where both parents are around. Every single point you brought up could be resolved if the focus were placed on both parents being in their kids lives.

The boys will have a positive male role model because their pops is there.
The daughters will have a positive male role model because their pops is there.
The household will be wealthier because the pops is there.
The community will be stronger economically and more in tact because the pops is there.

I'll ask you one basic question. As a community, is being a single mother looked at negatively?

Activist? nikka I ain't no kinda activist. Read what I wrote in the beginning of this thread. Lemme save you some time and quote it for you:



I ain't mentoring none of these fukk nikkas in training. That's their parents responsibility. It'd be one thing if these kids were fatherless because their pops were being lynched, or an illness came wiping out millions of black fathers, or all the black men decided to go to war and got killed defending what they believe in. But that's not the case. I'm not picking up the slack because irresponsible men and women decided to have children. Until that fundamental issue is addressed, I'm not doing a god damn thing to help.

Everything you said should give you even more of a reason to make it so that single parent homes are viewed as the deplorable in our community. You said it best, those kids might grow up to be criminals, welfare babies, prison bound, and all around burdens to society. If kids from single parent households will be so horrible, then we as a community should do everything in our power to make sure these types of households aren't acceptable.

All that's going to do is fukk up the kids even more.


This back and forth is pretty pointless and if mentoring is not a solution, and we already know shaming is not a solution, you know what is


ethical landmines like forcibly removing kids from the home and giving them up for adoption, or good ol' sterilization.

 

[↓R↑LYB]

They don't look at themselves with shame. But everyone else does. Who's picture shows up when we talk about poverty or foodstamps? Single black mothers. Who's picture shows up when we talk about young men growing into deadbeats, single black mothers. Most dudes won't even date a single mother.

And none of this has compelled them to change their ways, in fact as your article pointed out the shame has given them a sense of pride and they are passing that pride tontheir daughters.

Breh, single black mothers started becoming the face of poverty in the 1960s in an attempt to get white America to hate welfare (back when black people weren't even really allowed to get welfare benefits). I'm not talking about how white people view us, I'm talking about how our community view single mothers.

Our community doesn't view single mothers negatively. Name a single song, movie, TV show, political figure, activist, or black leader in the last 30 years (outside of Bill Cosby) who made a negative comment about single moms.

 

[Ohene]

Are we to assume that 100% of black women are worth a shyt.

How the hell did I miss this big ass thread

 

[↓R↑LYB]

All that's going to do is fukk up the kids even more.


This back and forth is pretty pointless and if mentoring is not a solution, and we already know shaming is not a solution, you know what is


ethical landmines like forcibly removing kids from the home and giving them up for adoption, or good ol' sterilization.

We're not shaming single motherhood. We never have. Dead beat dads are definitely shamed. But single moms?

Let's stop pretending we are because we got a couple nikkas on the internet talking about it. As a whole, our culture does not shame it. The same way our culture doesn't shame gangs and violence.

Let's not pretend breh.

 

[↓R↑LYB]

Dis Right Hurr...

Is Pac a c00n?

My fo fo make sure all your kids don't grow

Or is it because nikkas like pac's music so he gets a pass despite how many nikkas killed on records

 

[concise]

We're not shaming single motherhood. We never have. Dead beat dads are definitely shamed. But single moms?

Let's stop pretending we are because we got a couple nikkas on the internet talking about it. As a whole, our culture does not shame it. The same way our culture doesn't shame gangs and violence.

Let's not pretend breh.

They are shamed, though. I guess you want them to be shamed even more, I guess. And of course deadbeat dads are definitely shamed. That's because they don't even try. Surely you understand the difference there?

 

[↓R↑LYB]

How the hell did I miss this big ass thread

I stopped posting in this thread paaaaaaaaaages ago. I just got bored and really ain't got shyt else to do

 

[↓R↑LYB]

They are shamed, though. I guess you want them to be shamed even more, I guess. And of course deadbeat dads are definitely shamed. That's because they don't even try. Surely you understand the difference there?

There's a difference true, but I'll pose the same question to you that I asked Meech.

Name a single song, movie, TV show, political figure, activist, or black leader in the last 30 years (outside of Bill Cosby) who made a negative comment about single moms.

 

[TLR Is Mental Poison]

Let's not pretend breh.

Lets also not pretend talking on the internet and doing nothing else = making a difference. What are you doing about this once you log off????

Or that shaming moms for kids who are already born = keeping them from having kids they weren't gonna have anyway (if we are talking about moms w/kids old enough to be mentored)

Lets also not pretend the shaming of single moms doesn't serve a personal agenda of convenience & self-praise (i.e. its way easier to sit behind a computer screen and "shame" imaginary people than actually be out in the midst of them... and of course dudes' obsessions here with anti-black female rhetoric speaks to something "way more sinister")

I agree that discouraging single parent families should be a part of the strategy... but "lets not pretend" like it in itself is a comprehensive strategy. We still have to deal with all the single families in existence now and shame will do nothing for them.

 

[concise]

There's a difference true, but I'll pose the same question to you that I asked Meech.

Name a single song, movie, TV show, political figure, activist, or black leader in the last 30 years (outside of Bill Cosby) who made a negative comment about single moms.

Do church pastors count? I heard them all the time growing up.

 

[MeachTheMonster]

Breh, single black mothers started becoming the face of poverty in the 1960s in an attempt to get white America to hate welfare (back when black people weren't even really allowed to get welfare benefits). I'm not talking about how white people view us, I'm talking about how our community view single mothers.

Our community doesn't view single mothers negatively. Name a single song, movie, TV show, political figure, activist, or black leader in the last 30 years (outside of Bill Cosby) who made a negative comment about single moms.

plenty of rap songs, shyt on single mothers. Politicians blame them for using up all the welfare. I've heard Al Sharpton speak on it, and there was a whole special on PBS about how to fix the problem.

What you want is for someone to come out and say. "All single mothers ain't shyt, and they should be ashamed of themselves for picking a deadbeat dude" you will never hear this because for one it isn't true, and for two statements like that don't help anything they just increase the negativity and push people away.

 

[MeachTheMonster]

We're not shaming single motherhood. We never have. Dead beat dads are definitely shamed. But single moms?

Let's stop pretending we are because we got a couple nikkas on the internet talking about it. As a whole, our culture does not shame it. The same way our culture doesn't shame gangs and violence.

Let's not pretend breh.

Only gangsters and single moms think ganbanging and single motherhood are commendable. Everyone else frown upon these types of people. Yes you hear singlemotherhood and gangbanging being praised within our communty, but that's only coming from single moms and gangbangers. I've never heard any black leaders or responsible black people praising single mother or gangbangers

 

[marcuz]

@MeachTheMonster

this so called shaming of black single mothers doesn't exist. being a dead beat dad is whats frowned upon. i've never heard a public figure question black womens choices in the men they procreate with. even obama got on camera and praised single mothers as the back bone of the black community; while telling black men they need to man up and raise their kids

 

[MeachTheMonster]

@MeachTheMonster

this so called shaming of black single mothers doesn't exist. being a dead beat dad is whats frowned upon. i've never heard a public figure question black womens choices in the men they procreate with. even obama got on camera and praised single mothers as the back bone of the black community; while telling black men they need to man up and raise their kids

Anytime you see a story about welfare, who do they show?

Anytime you see ghetto/ratchetness , who do they show

Who gets blamed for raising all these deadbeat dads?

Reality is we spend too much time shaming each other, when we should be lifting each other up. Like I said earlier in this thread, shaming people has never been the answer. You say black men get all the shame for the situation well that shame hasn't pushed them to change, so how will that blame compel women to change?