The women do not want to be wives....I repeat the women do not want to be wives belovedI’m not saying the man has to be prepared to have a stay at home wife by 30.
HOW MANY young Black men are actually dating FOR MARRIAGE at 25, 27, 30? How many are sitting with their peer group saying “Hey yall, time to get married!”
Women, especially young, will follow you off the edge of a damn cliff if you just make some stupid promises. Let alone actually tell her you want to marry her and follow through.
Pretty much. And the small percentage that go on to perform at a professional level may or may not stay together. The vast majority that don’t go pro are going back home to their communities. Most of those women aren’t staying with washed athletes with general studies degrees. Especially if their family comes from money. Everybody has their fun and goes home at the end of the day.Black people are broke. Bw in college be extra broke. Just breathing collegiate air puts us in debt. We don't have familial support. We paying for EVERYTHING.
So, really, what yall saying is, the white man's reward for raping and pillaging the planet is that his daughters can afford to go buy a bm of her own.
the parents are about the IR. The ones who are super liberal and like whatever (and usually secular) tend to see their kids marry out. More conservative ones have higher rates of marrying in though many still marry out a lot. One Jewish guy I know with a Jewish wife told me his grandma literally said one of his duties in life was to give her Jewish great-grandkids. And he did. Jewish people are now more focused on making sure interfaith grandkids are raised in Jewish ways (Hebrew school, high holidays) but even that is a struggle.
And then cry when shyt doesn't go our wayYou are one of the best posters on the site and I get where you are coming from as a woman, but while I may have had that perspective in the past I have changed my outlook based on a few experiences.
First, I have a large pool of friends, neighbors, etc. who are not Black and all these women from groups that have an equal, or even surplus, of high value men (Asian, Jewish, Indian, etc.) marry out at rates multiples of BW. Granted Asian women have some issues with their men and Indian women often get shamed/forced into marrying Indian, but the Jewish example is pretty illuminating.
They are one of the wealthiest and most educated groups in the country with no homicide or underclass problems at a large scale and plenty of men and women in the top professions and earning brackets. Yet the young ones marry non-Jews 50% of the time. Sure, they are White and are assimilating into White culture but if you talk to Jews, you realize a big difference between those whose kids marry Jewish and who don't are how
So even if Black men were at parity, I think Black women would increasingly date out because we are a minority in a country where IR is increasingly less stigmatized.
I didn't want to bring this up earlier in the thread because I thought it was going to devolve into bashing BW on mating strategies, but in my life I have only dated educated BW and I married one. If I had just been "open" to all the women in college that were nice and checked the right boxes, I would probably almost never have dated a Black woman and probably wouldn't be married to one either. I had a lot of educated, and even wealthy White, Asian, and Indian women approach me in college and the wider world. I am not saying this to humble brag or make juvenile claims I have "leverage" over Black women to "shape up" because I have options. I am just mentioning a fact Black men of education and credentials run into in the modern USA.
The stark fact is that since we are only 14% of the population, and even less in high level fields and elite schools, every time you see a professional and successful Black couple, that couple exists because one (or likely both) of the Black people in that relationship turned down multiple suitable non-Black suitors in the past. In our wannabe post-racial world I know teaching preferences may seem like a dirty concept, but if you look at just random chance, you can only sustain a viable Black community and Black families, especially on the upper middle class end, if you accept teaching your kids to prefer Black isn't a bad thing.
My parents did that and me and my siblings all have Black spouses. Our friends with "whatever" parents are majority with non-Black partners.
I understand with the numbers that more Black women will date out and I have no problem with IR. There are many happy IR relationships and I wouldn't tell someone they are better off single than married with a suitable non-Black partner. But once we tell our kids that a strong Black preference or desire for a Black mate should not be their perspective, it's basically a road to complete assimilation, especially for the Talented Tenth outside of heavily Black metros.
Telling people to have no preference as a minority is telling them to have a preference---and in the majority of the cases it isn't a Black one. That's why I am not on board with the elders, particularly the men, actively prepping young Black men and women to date out. If they do, that is their choice and we should accept it but it is our responsibility to work to find them a suitable Black partner wherever possible. My Indian friends will call people they grew up with or attended school with in India who live on the other side of the USA to find viable suitors for their kids. We kinda just want to go with the flow or complain why everyone doesn't see how perfect we are.
Just my $0.02
Wealthy black men are going to be viewed as a paycheck no matter the race of the women they date.
This racial loyalty and generational wealth fearmongering happens every draft cycle when it comes to Black male athletes and BW policing their mate choices.
As if wealthy black men haven't been set up by BW, divorced by BW, cheated on by BW, money stolen, etc, etc. A Black man is only as good as his paycheck.
No matter the race of the woman.
You are one of the best posters on the site and I get where you are coming from as a woman, but while I may have had that perspective in the past I have changed my outlook based on a few experiences.
First, I have a large pool of friends, neighbors, etc. who are not Black and all these women from groups that have an equal, or even surplus, of high value men (Asian, Jewish, Indian, etc.) marry out at rates multiples of BW. Granted Asian women have some issues with their men and Indian women often get shamed/forced into marrying Indian, but the Jewish example is pretty illuminating.
They are one of the wealthiest and most educated groups in the country with no homicide or underclass problems at a large scale and plenty of men and women in the top professions and earning brackets. Yet the young ones marry non-Jews 50% of the time. Sure, they are White and are assimilating into White culture but if you talk to Jews, you realize a big difference between those whose kids marry Jewish and who don't are how
So even if Black men were at parity, I think Black women would increasingly date out because we are a minority in a country where IR is increasingly less stigmatized.
I didn't want to bring this up earlier in the thread because I thought it was going to devolve into bashing BW on mating strategies, but in my life I have only dated educated BW and I married one. If I had just been "open" to all the women in college that were nice and checked the right boxes, I would probably almost never have dated a Black woman and probably wouldn't be married to one either. I had a lot of educated, and even wealthy White, Asian, and Indian women approach me in college and the wider world. I am not saying this to humble brag or make juvenile claims I have "leverage" over Black women to "shape up" because I have options. I am just mentioning a fact Black men of education and credentials run into in the modern USA.
The stark fact is that since we are only 14% of the population, and even less in high level fields and elite schools, every time you see a professional and successful Black couple, that couple exists because one (or likely both) of the Black people in that relationship turned down multiple suitable non-Black suitors in the past. In our wannabe post-racial world I know teaching preferences may seem like a dirty concept, but if you look at just random chance, you can only sustain a viable Black community and Black families, especially on the upper middle class end, if you accept teaching your kids to prefer Black isn't a bad thing.
My parents did that and me and my siblings all have Black spouses. Our friends with "whatever" parents are majority with non-Black partners.
I understand with the numbers that more Black women will date out and I have no problem with IR. There are many happy IR relationships and I wouldn't tell someone they are better off single than married with a suitable non-Black partner. But once we tell our kids that a strong Black preference or desire for a Black mate should not be their perspective, it's basically a road to complete assimilation, especially for the Talented Tenth outside of heavily Black metros.
Telling people to have no preference as a minority is telling them to have a preference---and in the majority of the cases it isn't a Black one. That's why I am not on board with the elders, particularly the men, actively prepping young Black men and women to date out. If they do, that is their choice and we should accept it but it is our responsibility to work to find them a suitable Black partner wherever possible. My Indian friends will call people they grew up with or attended school with in India who live on the other side of the USA to find viable suitors for their kids. We kinda just want to go with the flow or complain why everyone doesn't see how perfect we are.
Just my $0.02
This is stupid
They just like white p*ssy.
And I totally, totally feel you.You are one of the best posters on the site and I get where you are coming from as a woman, but while I may have had that perspective in the past I have changed my outlook based on a few experiences.
First, I have a large pool of friends, neighbors, etc. who are not Black and all these women from groups that have an equal, or even surplus, of high value men (Asian, Jewish, Indian, etc.) marry out at rates multiples of BW. Granted Asian women have some issues with their men and Indian women often get shamed/forced into marrying Indian, but the Jewish example is pretty illuminating.
They are one of the wealthiest and most educated groups in the country with no homicide or underclass problems at a large scale and plenty of men and women in the top professions and earning brackets. Yet the young ones marry non-Jews 50% of the time. Sure, they are White and are assimilating into White culture but if you talk to Jews, you realize a big difference between those whose kids marry Jewish and who don't are how
So even if Black men were at parity, I think Black women would increasingly date out because we are a minority in a country where IR is increasingly less stigmatized.
I didn't want to bring this up earlier in the thread because I thought it was going to devolve into bashing BW on mating strategies, but in my life I have only dated educated BW and I married one. If I had just been "open" to all the women in college that were nice and checked the right boxes, I would probably almost never have dated a Black woman and probably wouldn't be married to one either. I had a lot of educated, and even wealthy White, Asian, and Indian women approach me in college and the wider world. I am not saying this to humble brag or make juvenile claims I have "leverage" over Black women to "shape up" because I have options. I am just mentioning a fact Black men of education and credentials run into in the modern USA.
The stark fact is that since we are only 14% of the population, and even less in high level fields and elite schools, every time you see a professional and successful Black couple, that couple exists because one (or likely both) of the Black people in that relationship turned down multiple suitable non-Black suitors in the past. In our wannabe post-racial world I know teaching preferences may seem like a dirty concept, but if you look at just random chance, you can only sustain a viable Black community and Black families, especially on the upper middle class end, if you accept teaching your kids to prefer Black isn't a bad thing.
My parents did that and me and my siblings all have Black spouses. Our friends with "whatever" parents are majority with non-Black partners.
I understand with the numbers that more Black women will date out and I have no problem with IR. There are many happy IR relationships and I wouldn't tell someone they are better off single than married with a suitable non-Black partner. But once we tell our kids that a strong Black preference or desire for a Black mate should not be their perspective, it's basically a road to complete assimilation, especially for the Talented Tenth outside of heavily Black metros.
Telling people to have no preference as a minority is telling them to have a preference---and in the majority of the cases it isn't a Black one. That's why I am not on board with the elders, particularly the men, actively prepping young Black men and women to date out. If they do, that is their choice and we should accept it but it is our responsibility to work to find them a suitable Black partner wherever possible. My Indian friends will call people they grew up with or attended school with in India who live on the other side of the USA to find viable suitors for their kids. We kinda just want to go with the flow or complain why everyone doesn't see how perfect we are.
Just my $0.02
This is a beautiful concept in 'theory' and I understand your sentiment, but it's not realistic in modern times. It's wayy to late and black people have not been on the same page as far as families, relationships, marriage etc in decades. It's a wrap...You are one of the best posters on the site and I get where you are coming from as a woman, but while I may have had that perspective in the past I have changed my outlook based on a few experiences.
First, I have a large pool of friends, neighbors, etc. who are not Black and all these women from groups that have an equal, or even surplus, of high value men (Asian, Jewish, Indian, etc.) marry out at rates multiples of BW. Granted Asian women have some issues with their men and Indian women often get shamed/forced into marrying Indian, but the Jewish example is pretty illuminating.
They are one of the wealthiest and most educated groups in the country with no homicide or underclass problems at a large scale and plenty of men and women in the top professions and earning brackets. Yet the young ones marry non-Jews 50% of the time. Sure, they are White and are assimilating into White culture but if you talk to Jews, you realize a big difference between those whose kids marry Jewish and who don't are how
So even if Black men were at parity, I think Black women would increasingly date out because we are a minority in a country where IR is increasingly less stigmatized.
I didn't want to bring this up earlier in the thread because I thought it was going to devolve into bashing BW on mating strategies, but in my life I have only dated educated BW and I married one. If I had just been "open" to all the women in college that were nice and checked the right boxes, I would probably almost never have dated a Black woman and probably wouldn't be married to one either. I had a lot of educated, and even wealthy White, Asian, and Indian women approach me in college and the wider world. I am not saying this to humble brag or make juvenile claims I have "leverage" over Black women to "shape up" because I have options. I am just mentioning a fact Black men of education and credentials run into in the modern USA.
The stark fact is that since we are only 14% of the population, and even less in high level fields and elite schools, every time you see a professional and successful Black couple, that couple exists because one (or likely both) of the Black people in that relationship turned down multiple suitable non-Black suitors in the past. In our wannabe post-racial world I know teaching preferences may seem like a dirty concept, but if you look at just random chance, you can only sustain a viable Black community and Black families, especially on the upper middle class end, if you accept teaching your kids to prefer Black isn't a bad thing.
My parents did that and me and my siblings all have Black spouses. Our friends with "whatever" parents are majority with non-Black partners.
I understand with the numbers that more Black women will date out and I have no problem with IR. There are many happy IR relationships and I wouldn't tell someone they are better off single than married with a suitable non-Black partner. But once we tell our kids that a strong Black preference or desire for a Black mate should not be their perspective, it's basically a road to complete assimilation, especially for the Talented Tenth outside of heavily Black metros.
Telling people to have no preference as a minority is telling them to have a preference---and in the majority of the cases it isn't a Black one. That's why I am not on board with the elders, particularly the men, actively prepping young Black men and women to date out. If they do, that is their choice and we should accept it but it is our responsibility to work to find them a suitable Black partner wherever possible. My Indian friends will call people they grew up with or attended school with in India who live on the other side of the USA to find viable suitors for their kids. We kinda just want to go with the flow or complain why everyone doesn't see how perfect we are.
Just my $0.02
Good post. It seems as though Black men due to ego and pride just want those women to wait on the sidelines or date/marry down vs aiming higher and opening up their options. With that mindset they don’t want what's best for Black women. It's a selfish mindset..
