40+ Successful professional black women are getting in vitro to be "single mothers by choice"

[Menna]

Anyone else noticing this trend lately? is this the endgame? Over the past few months I have met so many black women who either already got the In vitro fertilization or are in the process of getting it to willingly become single mothers. They all fit the same archetype. Successful black women, career oriented, wanting a top teir man, single and over 40 years old. It's insane to me that these women would rather become single mothers from a sperm bank than date and marry an average breh but this is where we are.

I met a 42 year old chick off a dating app a few weeks ago with a 1 year old and when I asked about the father she told be she voluntarily got in vitro cause she wanted to be mother. I just couldn't take her seriously anymore. Even after they become single mothers they still think they can get a top tier breh. Are these women that delusional? Why would you willingly lower your value on the dating market?

Here is an article on it I found
Changing the Narrative Around Black Single Motherhood - Seattle Sperm Bank

I know a guy who has no sperm in his body missing the cells that make sperm he needs stranger or family sperm interred into a women to have a child if he doesn’t adopt

 

[Lexx Diamond]

The life and work of being a wife is not what most women really want.

 

[Red Shield]

Ehhh our community has been cooked for decades at this point.


Also once any society has hit a certain level of advancement and can allow it's women more freedom.. Women will choose to have a few or no kids. Hell even single motherhood if society allows it with no shame.

And that continues until society collapses... in which case conservatism comes back big time. When I say that I don't mean the american brand. But the general humanity brand of conservatism.

 

[papa pimp]

These ancient societies were small, rural, and had interconnected kinship with some inbreeding making them like a big extended family.

When you have wealth, assets, and large societies marriage becomes common and crucial. What is recent is consensual and romantic marriage rather than arranged marriage.

Anyways, we aren't discussing raising kids communally. We are talking SMBC depending only on personal income and assets to supplant most of this.

There has always been a wide variety of family styles in every society. Claiming that this displaces monogamous two parent homes though does not follow.

Where is the long history of single parents without family or communal support raising kids en mass? Just because the 1950s nuclear family didn't always exist doesn't mean anything goes.

How long before this goes from being a last chance to a first option in the eyes of many women?

Thank you. Its wild how she tried to get such a ahistorical non-contextualized take off.

 

[V Skyye]

Well that's tough. I wonder who the blame falls on because I see couples everywhere I go. Even fat ugly men and fat ugly women get together and start a family.




Women who say they don't need a man gets celebrated by other women.

Men who say they don't need a woman gets looked at weird by other men.

The bolded is more in terms of dating and sex. I see men universally say they need to have sex. Those who say they need relationships or marriage are often mocked and called soft.

There’s more concern, focus, and discourse about women not being married than men in Black culture. And she’s correct that most of the men pushing this discourse aren’t married themselves and many aren’t seriously dating with intentions on marriage. If men aren’t actively dating for marriage starting in their early to mid 20s (like I see many saying women should do) it’s just useless back and forth.

 

[ThrobbingHood]

I mean Naomi Campbell, the most famous supermodel in history, chose to become a baby mama via a surrogate…. If that doesn’t say it all.

She’ll be 70 by the time her children are in college.

 

[DrBanneker]

She’ll be 70 by the time her children are in college.

I don't want to hear any damn excuses or finger pointing in defense of Naomi and her decision. She dated some of the richest White men on the planet so Black men don't have anything to do with her not being chosen.

But even if your mom was a single mom, I find it surprising that you would embrace that narrative instead of bucking it. Not my life though.

 

[ThrobbingHood]

I don't want to hear any damn excuses or finger pointing in defense of Naomi and her decision. She dated some of the richest White men on the planet so Black men don't have anything to do with her not being chosen.

But even if your mom was a single mom, I find it surprising that you would embrace that narrative instead of bucking it. Not my life though.

Eboni, Tyra and Naomi all came from broken homes and all chose to be single mothers… I’m sure that just a coincidence.

 

[Babymama Magnet]

Eboni, Tyra and Naomi all came from broken homes and all chose to be single mothers… I’m sure that just a coincidence.

They've all seen their mothers 'manage' without having a father or male presence in the home so they've learnt that they themselves don't need a man, especially as they have the resources to take care of them and their children.

We're ignoring the impact that as children, what we learn within the household shapes our perspective on how we ourselves operate life and it seems to me that as black people not enough of us see the value in marriage or the value in having a 2 parent household.

 

[ThrobbingHood]

They've all seen their mothers 'manage' without having a father or male presence in the home so they've learnt that they themselves don't need a man, especially as they themselves have the resources to take care of them and their children.

Username to post ratio is

 

[ThrobbingHood]

Brehs…. I kid you not. In the past two months, my fiancée has been to five baby showers. Not one of them are married or are with the child’s father.

And these are professional women, not hoodrats. Women from good homes, well educated and attractive (I saw the pictures). All in their early to mid 30s.

This is getting out of hand. Our “community” is well and truly cooked. I get that there are trash men out there but holy shyt, they’d rather raise a child in a broken home than attempt to raise a stable family?

I don’t even know what to say anymore. My other half didn’t even want to attend most of them because she was so disappointed.

More baby showers than engagement parties.

 

[Apollo Creed]

Brehs…. I kid you not. In the past two months, my fiancée has been to five baby showers. Not one of them are married or are with the child’s father.

And these are professional women, not hoodrats. Women from good homes, well educated and attractive (I saw the pictures).

This is getting out of hand. Our “community” is well and truly cooked. I get that there are trash men out there but holy shyt, they’d rather raise a child in a broken home than attempt to raise a stable family?

I don’t even know what to say anymore. My other half didn’t even want to attend most of them because she was so disappointed.

More baby showers than engagement parties.

There is no “community”.

There is a shift where there will he two new ethnicities. One where people were fathered by black men and “the other”.

Dudes fighting for something already done with the women of all levels saying they dont want a community only complete control and power

 

[Georgiamuscle]

Brehs…. I kid you not. In the past two months, my fiancée has been to five baby showers. Not one of them are married or are with the child’s father.

And these are professional women, not hoodrats. Women from good homes, well educated and attractive (I saw the pictures). All in their early to mid 30s.

This is getting out of hand. Our “community” is well and truly cooked. I get that there are trash men out there but holy shyt, they’d rather raise a child in a broken home than attempt to raise a stable family?

I don’t even know what to say anymore. My other half didn’t even want to attend most of them because she was so disappointed.

More baby showers than engagement parties.

Ngl breh I see and know a lot of single mom cacs too. It affects our community at a higher rate but it’s definitely an emerging issue in society in general

 

[ThrobbingHood]

There is no “community”.

There is a shift where there will he two new ethnicities. One where people were fathered by black men and “the other”.

Dudes fighting for something already done with the women of all levels saying they dont want a community only complete control and power

Breh, it’s heart breaking to see this happen. I’d post the pictures if I could. These are legit gorgeous women.

I’d understand if they were in their 40s but to be relatively young and choose single motherhood? I just don’t understand the logic. Is it selfishness? Mental illness? Vanity?

One of the baby showers was my future cousin in law. Literally the total package. Single mother at 33. Unbelievable.

 

[Wiseborn]

Ngl breh I see and know a lot of single mom cacs too. It affects our community at a higher rate but it’s definitely an emerging issue in society in general

Its more prevalent in South America than in Black America

Its a global issue.

As has been said the world is going to be increasingly divided among a tiny elite of families and a vast underclass of single momma raised kids