What is benching? The latest dating trend has some feeling ‘disposable

re'up

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Read one of these this year that was

zombieing

texting someone after months of no contact, in other words, getting in touch with someone

granted there's extremes or clumsy ways to do that. but labeling getting a text from someone you assumedly like or liked on some level, as this red flag is wild.

so, if I see something to send a person, an article, a book, whatever, I'm zombeing someone? lol
 

DonRe

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Ive been benched waived traded and put on a ten 10-day when the org needed a body just in case.

Ive also done the same.

Its all in the game. These cacs either steal our lingo or butcher it into lameness

Low key white boys truly treat they women like boston treated Isiah thomas. And its blatant and cold.
 

re'up

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There's a rigidity to these rules, that's like dogmatic. And, yes, meeting someone you like and getting "benched" isn't fun, it's happened to me

but, lets encourage good communication, and mutual consideration, and not come up with alll these hyper technical Title IX violations

for something as complex as dating, sex, love, whatever.
 
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They want the kind of men that can attract a lot of women.

But want that man to only have eyes for them. They are destined to agonize over something they can never have. To roll the rock up the hill and be forced to do it over and over again like sisyphus

a09.gif


I'll await the inevitable article of the hot new craze of people having realistic standards and being happy meeting people organically and getting into relationship based on shared values and interests.
You joke, but it will happen..........
 

Umoja

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The thing I don't like about these articles is that they tacitly encourage toxic behaviour.

“In fact, I encourage all of my clients to build a bench. Benching, dating more than one person at a time, is actually what dating is all about,” she told The Post.

“To be clear, I don’t believe in lying or leading somebody on. If your romantic partner says straight up that they want a full commitment and you aren’t ready, you should out of a matter of respect, let them go,” she clarified. “Keeping them on the sidelines isn’t benching, it’s disrespectful.”

She finds the practice of dating one person at a time a waste, especially for women.

It's the equivalent of disclaimer that goes before a Torrent Client instructing users not to access material they don't have a right to. They know exactly how their advice, or tool, will be utilised and are simply looking to shield themselves from criticism.

Even that part about "Unless they say straight up" is giving enough wiggle room to approach the game with dishonesty. Why not act on signs that someone is looking for more instead?

The reality is that you don't often encounter people who are just straight up about what they're doing. They're cagey about it because they know the person would walk away. What you end up with is people drip feeding people just enough to keep interest which isn't right.
 

re'up

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to add on, often you are benched, which is really a dumb word, with a negative connotation, that suggests intent, when it's more like you just aren't connecting, anyway

then you circle back around to each other. Sometimes you get ghosted, and then have a incredible night a month later. Or 7 months later. Or even 2 years later. This is really common for me.

It seems counterproductive, but I guess some of this is viewed through the lens of efficiency to find a true relationship, given that someone not responding to a text, or kind of putting you on the side doesn't mean that you can NEVER see them again.

there this prevailing theme in a lot of this, that puts every decision as final and also exclusionary.
 

Lieutenant Daniels

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The thing I don't like about these articles is that they tacitly encourage toxic behaviour.
In fact, I encourage all of my clients to build a bench. Benching, dating more than one person at a time, is actually what dating is all about,” she told The Post.

“To be clear, I don’t believe in lying or leading somebody on. If your romantic partner says straight up that they want a full commitment and you aren’t ready, you should out of a matter of respect, let them go,” she clarified. “Keeping them on the sidelines isn’t benching, it’s disrespectful.”

She finds the practice of dating one person at a time a waste, especially for women.



It's the equivalent of disclaimer that goes before a Torrent Client instructing users not to access material they don't have a right to. They know exactly how their advice, or tool, will be utilised and are simply looking to shield themselves from criticism.

Even that part about "Unless they say straight up" is giving enough wiggle room to approach the game with dishonesty. Why not act on signs that someone is looking for more instead?

The reality is that you don't often encounter people who are just straight up about what they're doing. They're cagey about it because they know the person would walk away. What you end up with is people drip feeding people just enough to keep interest which isn't right.

Exactly. Also, I think for men most operate on a scarcity level. If they tell the one prospect they have the truth, then the likelihood of him not getting another chick sooner rather than later is high. Unfortunately, most guys don’t have the luxury of “telling hoes the truth about their intentions”. Women on the other hand don’t face that reality that men go through. Which brings me to my next point below.

She makes the claim that “especially women dating one person at a time is a waste”

She obviously doesn’t see that the scales are overwhelmingly tipped in women’s favor for her to make that claim. Women can date one man at a time because if it fails another one is instantly available. If anything it should be encouraged for men to date several women at a time because at ANY moment he could have zero prospects for months and in extreme cases year/s.
 
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