Oh, damn. I am so sorry for your loss. I'm gonna keep you and your family in my prayers. Sending you all the hugs and strength and peace.
Listen, I know you gonna have a lot of people in your ear telling you to stay strong and that's true but don't confuse strength with not letting yourself grieve. Grief is a sneaky mofo and if you try to get around it instead of through it, it's going to keep blocking you in ways you may not even realize are happening. Let yourself work through it and don't feel like you gotta go it alone. Find some support and let folks be there for you. Ain't no shame at all in leaning on your people in times like this.