The ***OFFICIAL*** Share Stories Of Times You Tried To Get *OUT* Of Having Sex...
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HalfwayHandsome
A WALKING LICK #502C0MEUP
My boss hooked me up wit her fugly ass little cousin. Gone tell me she's cute and very nice. So I go pick this bytch up from the mcdonalds all the way on the other side of town. I call her and tell her I'm outside, she sounds cute so I'm getting excited. I could see all the workers inside cleaning and getting ready to close, so I'm in the car pointin out bytches to myself talmbout "ooohh I hope it's that on right there" After about 20 minutes of convincing myself I was gone be fukkin that fine lightskin broad wit the fry grease on her shirt. A big burly ass bytch look like a mix between Bernie Mack and Rosane heads toward my car. In my head I'm thinkin "this can't be her" I kept tellin myself she was gone stop off at one of these empty vehicles and drive her fat ass home.
Nope bytch walks right up to my car talmbout "You Meach?" I started to tell that bytch hell naw and ride the fukk off, but I got respect for my boss and my job so I tell the bytch hop in. We get back to our side of town and the bytch wanna stop at blockbuster, I'm like fukk that I might see somebody I know in there. So I drop her off at blockbuster and go across the street to taco bell.
We make it to her house. bytch inhales the tacos, then goes to take a shower. It took everything in me not to make a run for it while she was in the shower. But i stick around and watch the movie wit her. I fell asleep on her and the movie, she wake me up talmbout "you tired" I'm like "yeah but I'm alright" so she gets to reachin down a nikka pants and shyt and I'm like "fukk it imo take one for the team, maybe I can get some dome out of the equation" bytch lean over me i feel all her stomach rolls and catch a glimpse of that black shyt on the back of her neck and I'm like "fukk this I'm out" I make up an excuse about some shyt i had to do and got the fukk outa there.
Next day at work my boss ask me how it went. I'm a nice dude so i didn't go in her fat as cousin. I told her we had a nice time and I'd be calling her cousin laterI never called the bytch again, every once in a while my boss would ask me if I called her. I stayed with a new excuse as to why i wasn't callin that fat bytch. Lookin back i shoulda told my boss and that fat bytch that she was nasty and i cant get down like that, but you live and you learn
Heres a good one from when I was young.
So...I'm a fresman in high school...only 14 and a virgin.
Been in school for a few months getting my feet wet to the whole high school thing. Im in this art class with a best friend of mine. There is this senior girl named Brandi whose in there with us filling up and elective. Shes this pretty blonde girl, 17 at the time and about a 7 in my eyes.
Shes dating some football player who was pretty cool...also a senior.
So me and my best friend are always talking to her and joking around and shyt. Shes got a good sense of humor and doesnt mind talking to us freshman.
So ive got a thing for this chick and she probably can tell. So after school one day im out front with a bunch of the kids who take my bus. She comes walking ip and goes "hey, you want a ride?'.
Im a bit taken aback and nervous because i was not expecting it and theres some juniors and seniors around who definitly know who shes dating.
So i try and blow her off on some " thanks but im alright to take the bus " type nonsense. Instead shes like..."no its no big deal at all...cmon let me drive you."
So im like fukk what can i do...gotta go. By now people are paying attention to the fact im about to catch a ride home with Brandi.
So we go get kn her car and i tell her where i live amd shes like "cool...i know where that is."
She then proceeds to drive completely past my street. Im like hey that was it there. Shes lkke "oh I know..i jusg have to stop at my house first."
Now im sweating. My minds racing to try and decipher what this shyt all means. Im a horny 14 year old whose have scared shytless that no matter what happens km going to get my ass kicked by this senior tomorrow for catching a ride with his girlfriend.
So we get to her house and it gets worse.
"Hey come on inside for a miinute...my parents arent home so its ok."
Gulp.
We go inside and she tells me to have a seat on the couch. She sits next to me amd starts talking to me about random shyt sitting practically on top of me. I dont know wtf is happening or wtf is the right move. Keep in mind i was like narely over 5 feet tall back then. The thought of doing some shyt with this girl has.me half erect half scared of the.p*ssy and fearing for my life.
So...after half an hour its pretty clear why she brought me there and equally clear i am scared shytless to tough her. Now she starts playing hard ball. Shes like "can you help me with slmething?" Im like sure whats up?.
This bytch stands up and undoes her jeans turns around and bends iver with her naked ass jn my face and goes 'do i have a bruise on my bum? It hurts and feels like i have one on my right side."
Im just stuck.....im like "uhhhh...no..looks fine to me."
Thks bytch ks like "oh hell no...i came to far to come away empty handed " so shes like.." are you sure? Can you feel around for a bump or anything?"
(Not one word of this is
btw)
So i start feeljng this chicks ass...boner jn my pants and panic in my chest.
Finally i just decide i cant do it....her boyfriend and all his jock friends are going to beat the shyt out of me if i do anything and frankley...this girl was so aggressive she was scaring the shyt out my virgin ass.
So i tell her nope! With the quickness.
She pulls up her pants frustrated as all hell and says "i have to bring you home now"
Worst car ride home ever.
So...I'm a fresman in high school...only 14 and a virgin.
Been in school for a few months getting my feet wet to the whole high school thing. Im in this art class with a best friend of mine. There is this senior girl named Brandi whose in there with us filling up and elective. Shes this pretty blonde girl, 17 at the time and about a 7 in my eyes.
Shes dating some football player who was pretty cool...also a senior.
So me and my best friend are always talking to her and joking around and shyt. Shes got a good sense of humor and doesnt mind talking to us freshman.
So ive got a thing for this chick and she probably can tell. So after school one day im out front with a bunch of the kids who take my bus. She comes walking ip and goes "hey, you want a ride?'.
Im a bit taken aback and nervous because i was not expecting it and theres some juniors and seniors around who definitly know who shes dating.
So i try and blow her off on some " thanks but im alright to take the bus " type nonsense. Instead shes like..."no its no big deal at all...cmon let me drive you."
So im like fukk what can i do...gotta go. By now people are paying attention to the fact im about to catch a ride home with Brandi.
So we go get kn her car and i tell her where i live amd shes like "cool...i know where that is."
She then proceeds to drive completely past my street. Im like hey that was it there. Shes lkke "oh I know..i jusg have to stop at my house first."
Now im sweating. My minds racing to try and decipher what this shyt all means. Im a horny 14 year old whose have scared shytless that no matter what happens km going to get my ass kicked by this senior tomorrow for catching a ride with his girlfriend.
So we get to her house and it gets worse.
"Hey come on inside for a miinute...my parents arent home so its ok."
Gulp.
We go inside and she tells me to have a seat on the couch. She sits next to me amd starts talking to me about random shyt sitting practically on top of me. I dont know wtf is happening or wtf is the right move. Keep in mind i was like narely over 5 feet tall back then. The thought of doing some shyt with this girl has.me half erect half scared of the.p*ssy and fearing for my life.
So...after half an hour its pretty clear why she brought me there and equally clear i am scared shytless to tough her. Now she starts playing hard ball. Shes like "can you help me with slmething?" Im like sure whats up?.
This bytch stands up and undoes her jeans turns around and bends iver with her naked ass jn my face and goes 'do i have a bruise on my bum? It hurts and feels like i have one on my right side."
Im just stuck.....im like "uhhhh...no..looks fine to me."
Thks bytch ks like "oh hell no...i came to far to come away empty handed " so shes like.." are you sure? Can you feel around for a bump or anything?"
(Not one word of this is
btw)So i start feeljng this chicks ass...boner jn my pants and panic in my chest.
Finally i just decide i cant do it....her boyfriend and all his jock friends are going to beat the shyt out of me if i do anything and frankley...this girl was so aggressive she was scaring the shyt out my virgin ass.
So i tell her nope! With the quickness.
She pulls up her pants frustrated as all hell and says "i have to bring you home now"
Worst car ride home ever.
My boss hooked me up wit her fugly ass little cousin. Gone tell me she's cute and very nice. So I go pick this bytch up from the mcdonalds all the way on the other side of town. I call her and tell her I'm outside, she sounds cute so I'm getting excited. I could see all the workers inside cleaning and getting ready to close, so I'm in the car pointin out bytches to myself talmbout "ooohh I hope it's that on right there" After about 20 minutes of convincing myself I was gone be fukkin that fine lightskin broad wit the fry grease on her shirt. A big burly ass bytch look like a mix between Bernie Mack and Rosane heads toward my car. In my head I'm thinkin "this can't be her" I kept tellin myself she was gone stop off at one of these empty vehicles and drive her fat ass home.
Nope bytch walks right up to my car talmbout "You Meach?" I started to tell that bytch hell naw and ride the fukk off, but I got respect for my boss and my job so I tell the bytch hop in. We get back to our side of town and the bytch wanna stop at blockbuster, I'm like fukk that I might see somebody I know in there. So I drop her off at blockbuster and go across the street to taco bell.
We make it to her house. bytch inhales the tacos, then goes to take a shower. It took everything in me not to make a run for it while she was in the shower. But i stick around and watch the movie wit her. I fell asleep on her and the movie, she wake me up talmbout "you tired" I'm like "yeah but I'm alright" so she gets to reachin down a nikka pants and shyt and I'm like "fukk it imo take one for the team, maybe I can get some dome out of the equation" bytch lean over me i feel all her stomach rolls and catch a glimpse of that black shyt on the back of her neck and I'm like "fukk this I'm out" I make up an excuse about some shyt i had to do and got the fukk outa there.
Next day at work my boss ask me how it went. I'm a nice dude so i didn't go in her fat as cousin. I told her we had a nice time and I'd be calling her cousin later
