The happily married or in a relationship thread. (Positive posts only)

[Verbal Kint]

Happily married. Been almost 7 years. She gets on my nerves sometimes but she's smart, bout her biz, and likes to get out and live life. Plus she's loyal and has my back. Marriage ain't easy but neither is winning a title and I'm getting my Curry on

 

[Elle Driver]

Im in a long term one.
We're both students and had chemistry like we'd known each other for years from the moment we met.
Didn't know how long we were going to work out initially since we're from different cultures (she's Asian) but it's been well over a year living together and we click.
She's starting to talk about marriage now and we both want kids so we'll see where it goes.
We want to finish school before making the leap and don't want to tie the knot when we're too young (23) but all things considered, it's likely going to happen after we finish if things remain the same.
That'd make us around 26/27 and truthfully, I'd be ready to have kids and settle down by that point.
Don't want to be too old but I definitely don't want any before we're prepared and neither does she.
We're heading to her folks' for Thanksgiving and mine for Christmas.
Her mom's cooking

Good luck. That's a good way of thinking, get married once y'all get through grad school/med school/law school. I met my husband when I was 23, then we got married when I was 28.

 

[Gully Bull]

negged for not posting anything heartfelt like everyone else...

A picture says a thousands word though shawty

Yo bullllsssshyt has been parted

 

[Killer Instinct]

Good luck. That's a good way of thinking, get married once y'all get through grad school/med school/law school. I met my husband when I was 23, then we got married when I was 28.

He put up with your mean ass that long so it definitely sounds like it's built to last.

Preciate it, Elle. Same to you.

 

[scarlxrd]

Almost 10 years now with my wife. She's made me a better man in literally every way possible. Love that woman.

 

[Elle Driver]

He put up with your mean ass that long so it definitely sounds like it's built to last.

Preciate it, Elle. Same to you.

You calling someone else mean? Aint that some shyt.

 

[Stir Fry]

For all the married brehs. What would y'all say the hardest thing about marriage is, and what could y'all have as a couple to maybe circumvent the problem?

The hardest thing I would say, is that the perfect partner does not exist. All of us that are telling you how great our marriages are will probably be just as quick in telling you that the person we're with doesn't meet every last one of our expectations of the idealized mate in our mind. If you want to circumvent the problem, find somebody that you can communicate with. Even then, that person will never fully grasp what it is exactly that you want from them because they are not you. However, the perfect mate will try to meet these expectations to the best of their abilities, and their perfect partner (ie: you) will appreciate that they want to at least understand what it is that you desire and are doing their best to fulfill it. One of the biggest parts of a successful relationship is being to leave your egos at the door for the betterment of the team. Also, remember that life is not a fashion show, if you find a great teammate then stick with them and don't put too much of your business out in the open for people to critique it.

 

[wickedsm]

15 years together here
My husband is truly my best friend in the world.
Plenty of challenges over the years, kids, stepkids, exes court
Him almost dying getting major surgery me having emergency surgery deaths of my mom and both our grandmothers. 2 big ass relocations multiple deployments and a 2 year stretch where we lived on opposite coasts. To name a few.

I love our life.
Typical Saturday here we got up early and just sat on the porch and talked for awhile. He did some car fixing and maintenance I cooked and fed him and now I'm here with my coli fam while he's getting his Cod on with his gaming brehs.

I would do it all over again no questions asked.

 

[scarlxrd]

For all the married brehs. What would y'all say the hardest thing about marriage is, and what could y'all have as a couple to maybe circumvent the problem?

Keeping communication open is key. You can go to sleep mad, it sucks but it doesn't hurt in the grand scheme. I'd say just don't let stuff linger, talk things out if you have an issue AS SOON as you have an issue. You'll look back on it as hurdles when it's all said and done.

For my situation, co-mingling money didn't work. Some people can make it work, we couldn't. She has her own, I have my own. We split bills like roommates and it works for us.

Don't be afraid to get counseling, it's always good to have a third party hash out arguments. People can be stubborn so it's better to have someone else judge who's right or wrong; DON'T LET A FRIEND OR FAMILY DO IT.

All those are things I learned the hard way

One more thing: Fights happen. I've seen people say "we've been together for 30 years and never fought"

That. Is. Bullshyt.

shyt gets personal and over the littlest thing. Just talk it out like you care about that person and you should get through almost anything.

 

[Stir Fry]

Keeping communication open is key. You can go to sleep mad, it sucks but it doesn't hurt in the grand scheme. I'd say just don't let stuff linger, talk things out if you have an issue AS SOON as you have an issue. You'll look back on it as hurdles when it's all said and done.

For my situation, co-mingling money didn't work. Some people can make it work, we couldn't. She has her own, I have my own. We split bills like roommates and it works for us.

Don't be afraid to get counseling, it's always good to have a third party hash out arguments. People can be stubborn so it's better to have someone else judge who's right or wrong; DON'T LET A FRIEND OR FAMILY DO IT.

All those are things I learned the hard way

100 FAX

 

[Yup]

That's very encouraging guys. Thank you for sharing.

 

[Verbal Kint]

For all the married brehs. What would y'all say the hardest thing about marriage is, and what could y'all have as a couple to maybe circumvent the problem?

Kind of an indirect answer but once you decide (or believe) once and for all that your wife has your best interest in mind and wants the best for you, you avoid a bunch of nonsense. Half of what people beef about is everyday stuff like 'she talking with an attitude' type stuff. Once you learn to not take things personal then you can each be yourselves without having to worry about them getting mad because you said something with half an attitude cuz your day sucked.

 

[Lord Beasley]

I love my wife and I love my life

 

[25YOUTHS!!]

So much positivity in this thread
#ColiLove

 

[Stir Fry]

Kind of an indirect answer but once you decide (or believe) once and for all that your wife has your best interest in mind and wants the best for you, you avoid a bunch of nonsense. Half of what people beef about is everyday stuff like 'she talking with an attitude' type stuff. Once you learn to not take things personal then you can each be yourselves without having to worry about them getting mad because you said something with half an attitude cuz your day sucked.

Real talk. I'd say most of our arguments end with, "You know, it was a long day at work and I just needed a minute to decompress and I'm sorry." This is why you can't let issues simmer though, because otherwise they'll come out in weird ways, turning a small misunderstanding into an all out fight.