The Curse of the Side-Baby: The Dallas Cowboys 22’ Offseason Thread

[Dwight Howard]

Ay man...

I just had the most blissful month and a half of my entire sports fan life. Since basically the playoffs I ain't paid one single lick of attention to anything to do with this football team or really the NFL in general.


I turned off my push alerts on my phone for any Cowboys related news.. stopped listening to the radio.. stopped watching ESPN... stop coming to The Coli.. stayed my ass off Twitter.

I made a pledge to myself to just not get stressed about this team and it was pure heaven. I got caught up on some Netflix shows, hit the gym more, even took golf lessons


But all good things must come to an end



----

Amari: Nobody should be surprised. Everyone called this two years ago when he signed the deal, that we had the out after 2 years and would likely not play out his contract here. So the scenario everyone saw happening just came to reality. The difference is we all expected Gallup to be further along and ready to take over as a #1. I don't see any scenario in which Amari succeeds in Cleveland. That's one of the worst possible spots he could have gone to, cold weather, outdoors, etc.

Gallup: This nikka 1 year younger than Amari man. How the fucc is that even possible? It feels like Amari been in the league 5 years longer than him. I like Gallup, he has some crazy big play ability and I don't mind the contract. He's just too inconsistent as a route runner to be one of the focal points of the offense. Even if we sign someone like a James Washington or something, it seems OBVIOUS to me we are drafting a WR somewhere in the first 3-4 rounds. Possibly even Olave (@smitty22) at 24?

Gregory: Of course they made it a priority to re-sign this fukkING CRACKHEAD over everyone else. Now that this drug addict got paid I will be shocked if he does not get suspended with the NFL for drugs again before the end of his contract. This dude is just a ticking timebomb. All these cac Cowboys Twitter heads are firmly planted on Gregory dikk and were dying to re-sign him which is sign #1 how you know he ain't shyt.


Happy Zuerlein got bounced. Sucks to lose Anger but in theory you should be able to just find a punter elsewhere. Don't like Schultz but on the tag it is what it is. They aren't going to draft someone as good of a receiver as him to step in right away, but they do need to draft a TE this year.

The NFL don't test for weed anymore so Gregory's troubles are irrelevant in today's league

 

[Codeine Bryant]

Same trash roster. Same trash result

Maybe Dak makes the 7th year leap that elite QBs make

 

[El Bombi]

Re-sign a Weed Ugly Baby beeh.

 

[LurkMoar]

 

[dtownreppin214]

Thought he might take that Denver interest seriously b/c of the weeeed. But that comfortable Dallas lifestyle won out.

 

[Buggsy Mogues]

The NFL don't test for weed anymore so Gregory's troubles are irrelevant in today's league

We have no idea what this dude Gregory is into. He had issues with coke in the past. It would not shock me in the least if he's popping pills and God knows what else

 

[Primetime21]

Coli swagboy fans can at least all agree that this signing is

He's right up there with Dak in terms of players on this team that absolutely disgust me. Par the course for this FO that they are rewarding this clown after that stunt he pulled vs San Fran.

 

[Akata Man Bromo]

We got em fellas

 

[Surreal]

How about not pull himself out of games, get covid and appear in the public maskless while out with covid. a $20M dummy

Yet and still he is a WR and the QB got 75 million and ain't done shyt

How did that 75 mill QB look without him? He looked like a 4th RD pick

Nikka has as many playoff wins as Baker progressive ass

Josh Allen and Joey B done lapped his ass

Had Parsons on Twitter laughing talkin bout "lolllll I love Dak" cause he know them nikkas done lapped him

7 seasons in that nikka still can't read coverages or make teammates better

Cooper? Been on Pro Bowls with multiple teams and lived up to his draft and contracts and will in the future

There's this thing you see....Dak has overachieved as a 4th RD pick to the point that he is now overrated. No matter how many moves the Jones make and drafting of other talent, we will never get past what we are. Because....paying 4th RD QBs and undrafted QB 1st RD QB money and not releasing them or drafting a 1st QB

Brady is an anomaly. Kurt Warner was an anomaly

Talent matters and we lack it in the most needed position

 

[Dwight Howard]

Yet and still he is a WR and the QB got 75 million and ain't done shyt

How did that 75 mill QB look without him? He looked like a 4th RD pick

Nikka has as many playoff wins as Baker progressive ass

Josh Allen and Joey B done lapped his ass

Had Parsons on Twitter laughing talkin bout "lolllll I love Dak" cause he know them nikkas done lapped him

7 seasons in that nikka still can't read coverages or make teammates better

Cooper? Been on Pro Bowls with multiple teams and lived up to his draft and contracts and will in the future

There's this thing you see....Dak has overachieved as a 4th RD pick to the point that he is now overrated. No matter how many moves the Jones make and drafting of other talent, we will never get past what we are. Because....paying 4th RD QBs and undrafted QB 1st RD QB money and not releasing them or drafting a 1st QB

Brady is an anomaly. Kurt Warner was an anomaly

Talent matters and we lack it in the most needed position

He the qb for the next 4 years. Get over it.

 

[Surreal]

He the qb for the next 4 years. Get over it.

If they were smart, he'll be gone in 2 seasons

He's Alex Smith with less mobility. Jim Harbaugh and Andy Reid were just smart to draft more talented QB as Alex played. Boyz should draft Willis in the 1st RD if they had any sense

 

[duckbutta]

And I would have beef with a QB that still couldn't read defenses in his 6th season.

Top 8 in all passing categories but he can't read defenses
How he do that

1800 yards in 4 and a half games last year, something no one has every done in the history of football but he can't read defenses

Imagine what happens if he does...he might never throw another incompletion again

 

[duckbutta]

If they were smart, he'll be gone in 2 seasons

He's Alex Smith with less mobility. Jim Harbaugh and Andy Reid were just smart to draft more talented QB as Alex played. Boyz should draft Willis in the 1st RD if they had any sense

Like how we should have drafted Justin Fields? I saw a whole bunch of that in this thread and then when Justin actually got under center I aint seen none of the people saying we should have drafted him to replace Dak post that shyt again. I wonder why

Like how we should have tanked for Trevor? I saw a whole bunch of that in this thread and then when Trevor got under center he couldn't throw as many touchdown passes in a season as Dak threw in a month.

 

[duckbutta]

Coli swagboy fans can at least all agree that this signing is

I hate this fukking team so much.

Come May I'm going to a neurologist so they can find the part of my brain that makes me a cowboys fan and have it removed

 

[lightskin jermaine]

Yet and still he is a WR and the QB got 75 million and ain't done shyt

How did that 75 mill QB look without him? He looked like a 4th RD pick

Nikka has as many playoff wins as Baker progressive ass

Josh Allen and Joey B done lapped his ass

Had Parsons on Twitter laughing talkin bout "lolllll I love Dak" cause he know them nikkas done lapped him

7 seasons in that nikka still can't read coverages or make teammates better

Cooper? Been on Pro Bowls with multiple teams and lived up to his draft and contracts and will in the future

There's this thing you see....Dak has overachieved as a 4th RD pick to the point that he is now overrated. No matter how many moves the Jones make and drafting of other talent, we will never get past what we are. Because....paying 4th RD QBs and undrafted QB 1st RD QB money and not releasing them or drafting a 1st QB

Brady is an anomaly. Kurt Warner was an anomaly

Talent matters and we lack it in the most needed position

How many WR's have lapped Amari? Josh Allen has Diggs and Joey B has Chase. Both better than cry baby-I gotta boo boo- Amari who gets paid $20M a year to play nikkas in chess in the lockerroom and drink gatorade in clutch time.

Unfortunately the QB position is a premium and they get overpaid. I will not argue you with that, but if I'm paying a WR $20M a year I expect him to be on the level of Davante, Ty Hill, Diggs or even a rookie Jamar Chase and Amari isn't that.