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MMSex, whats a good target calorie/day i should aim for?
also, i'm slim every where else guys. its literally just my stomach. it almost makes me feel like i just have alotta air in there because i always look bloated. i've been thinking about using gas medicine and detoxing...
If you claim 17% bodyfat at 5'11 185, you most likely fall into the skinny fat body type.
With that high body fat means you have little body mass you should probably eat around 1950-2350 (maybe around 2500 since you seem to be active) calories for cutting weight. Minimum .4g*bw for fat, min 170-220 g protein, fill the rest of the diet with healthy carbs (grains, fruits, veggies). I'm not a fan of low carb/high protein/high fat, keto like diets, I think they work best when you are already 8-9% body fat and you want to cut quickly to 5%. Josef Rakich has a few threads on bodybuilding.com that break down macros for cutting, re-feeds, carb cycling, etc.
Issues with bloat could be medicine you are taking, holding excess water, high sodium diet, or you just hold a lot of fat in your midsection. There are a few things you can do to dry out, drinking more water to flush out the retention, diuretics, cutting back on the sodium, eat more potassium, drop the big meals and eat smaller spread out meals (ex: 400-700 cals per sitting), identify if you have issues with dairy, etc.
At 17% you have a ways to diet before you see abs, generally speaking they start to show shape around 12% body fat, become visible around 10%, and look shredded <9%.
Patience and dedication brah.