Should the fatherless blame their Mom for not being wise enough to choose a solid Man?
- Thread starter Stuntone
- Start date
NoChillJones
Banned
As do we all though. A woman can be accused of choosing a bad mate, but that will never make up for the mate abandoning their child breh. There is no work around for that issue.
Cause that makes absolutely no fukking sense........
. You don't have to be married to take care of your child, you don't even have to live together......plenty of families co-parent together just fine. This has nothing to do with raising children breh.Of course, that's the difference between a man and a woman. A man will call out his fellow man when he is in the wrong. A woman never tells another woman when she is in the wrongAs do we all though. A woman can be accused of choosing a bad mate, but that will never make up for the mate abandoning their child breh. There is no work around for that issue.
Cause that makes absolutely no fukking sense........
Wear My Dawg's Hat
Superstar
The white folks come around with their "If it feels good, do it" sexual revolution in the sixties, abandoning
marriage and longheld family/community building methods.
Black folk, seeking to integrate into all things white, over embraced the "sex-first, everything else secondary" attitude from the white people's sexual revolution, just as we're throwing off the chains of enforced Jim Crow.
The last thing black folks needed was white people's sexual anarchy, where children become collateral casualties of causal sex.
We're still dealing with the harmful effects.
NoChillJones
Banned
........that's kind of a blanket statement, what proof do you have to support this?
How is your life at stake as a grown ass man or woman based on what your mother did to create you decades in the past.......
Paradise50
Superstar
Dynamics are very complicated to generalize it under the same umbrella. I will say that some moms have to be accountable for their decisions. Funny thing about relationships is that most people show they ain't shyt. The other partner just chooses to ignore it and/or their own ignorance thinks how they are is "positive". I've seen women get knocked up by nikkas that was already neglecting their kid(s), but women think "he won't do me like that"
NoChillJones
Banned
Another misguided statement that makes no sense.
Yup and then they blame the man when really an ain't shyt man gonna fukk regardless of what you tell them, therefore it's a woman who actually cares for her seeds responsibility to not fukk the ain't shyt men. You look stupid as hell pointing a finger at a man when YOU'RE the one that has to be pregnant and will grow biologically attached to the kid. Make better decisions dumb bytchDynamics are very complicated to generalize it under the same umbrella. I will say that some moms have to be accountable for their decisions. Funny thing about relationships is that most people show they ain't shyt. The other partner just chooses to ignore it and/or their own ignorance thinks how they are is "positive". I've seen women get knocked up by nikkas that was already neglecting their kid(s), but women think "he won't do me like that"
people can blame whoever they want,... this does not solve the issue. the question is this.. when the women choose you.. why don't the men choose them back ?
Wear My Dawg's Hat
Superstar
Blacks struggle with 72 percent unwed mothers rate
Debate is growing in and outside the black community
on how to address the rising issue
Dr. Natalie Carroll
By JESSE WASHINGTON
updated 11/7/2010 11:06:05 AM ET
HOUSTON — One recent day at Dr. Natalie Carroll's OB-GYN practice, located inside a low-income apartment complex tucked between a gas station and a freeway, 12 pregnant black women come for consultations. Some bring their children or their mothers. Only one brings a husband.
Things move slowly here. Women sit shoulder-to-shoulder in the narrow waiting room, sometimes for more than an hour. Carroll does not rush her mothers in and out. She wants her babies born as healthy as possible, so Carroll spends time talking to the mothers about how they should care for themselves, what she expects them to do — and why they need to get married.
Seventy-two percent of black babies are born to unmarried mothers today, according to government statistics. This number is inseparable from the work of Carroll, an obstetrician who has dedicated her 40-year career to helping black women.
"The girls don't think they have to get married. I tell them children deserve a mama and a daddy. They really do," Carroll says from behind the desk of her office, which has cushioned pink-and-green armchairs, bars on the windows, and a wooden "LOVE" carving between two African figurines. Diamonds circle Carroll's ring finger.
As the issue of black unwed parenthood inches into public discourse, Carroll is among the few speaking boldly about it. And as a black woman who has brought thousands of babies into the world, who has sacrificed income to serve Houston's poor, Carroll is among the few whom black women will actually listen to.
"A mama can't give it all. And neither can a daddy, not by themselves," Carroll says. "Part of the reason is because you can only give that which you have. A mother cannot give all that a man can give. A truly involved father figure offers more fullness to a child's life."
Read more at: Blacks struggle with 72 percent unwed mothers rate
Debate is growing in and outside the black community
on how to address the rising issue
Dr. Natalie Carroll
By JESSE WASHINGTON
updated 11/7/2010 11:06:05 AM ET
HOUSTON — One recent day at Dr. Natalie Carroll's OB-GYN practice, located inside a low-income apartment complex tucked between a gas station and a freeway, 12 pregnant black women come for consultations. Some bring their children or their mothers. Only one brings a husband.
Things move slowly here. Women sit shoulder-to-shoulder in the narrow waiting room, sometimes for more than an hour. Carroll does not rush her mothers in and out. She wants her babies born as healthy as possible, so Carroll spends time talking to the mothers about how they should care for themselves, what she expects them to do — and why they need to get married.
Seventy-two percent of black babies are born to unmarried mothers today, according to government statistics. This number is inseparable from the work of Carroll, an obstetrician who has dedicated her 40-year career to helping black women.
"The girls don't think they have to get married. I tell them children deserve a mama and a daddy. They really do," Carroll says from behind the desk of her office, which has cushioned pink-and-green armchairs, bars on the windows, and a wooden "LOVE" carving between two African figurines. Diamonds circle Carroll's ring finger.
As the issue of black unwed parenthood inches into public discourse, Carroll is among the few speaking boldly about it. And as a black woman who has brought thousands of babies into the world, who has sacrificed income to serve Houston's poor, Carroll is among the few whom black women will actually listen to.
"A mama can't give it all. And neither can a daddy, not by themselves," Carroll says. "Part of the reason is because you can only give that which you have. A mother cannot give all that a man can give. A truly involved father figure offers more fullness to a child's life."
Read more at: Blacks struggle with 72 percent unwed mothers rate
NoChillJones
Banned
Blacks struggle with 72 percent unwed mothers rate
Debate is growing in and outside the black community
on how to address the rising issue
Dr. Natalie Carroll
By JESSE WASHINGTON
updated 11/7/2010 11:06:05 AM ET
HOUSTON — One recent day at Dr. Natalie Carroll's OB-GYN practice, located inside a low-income apartment complex tucked between a gas station and a freeway, 12 pregnant black women come for consultations. Some bring their children or their mothers. Only one brings a husband.
Things move slowly here. Women sit shoulder-to-shoulder in the narrow waiting room, sometimes for more than an hour. Carroll does not rush her mothers in and out. She wants her babies born as healthy as possible, so Carroll spends time talking to the mothers about how they should care for themselves, what she expects them to do — and why they need to get married.
Seventy-two percent of black babies are born to unmarried mothers today, according to government statistics. This number is inseparable from the work of Carroll, an obstetrician who has dedicated her 40-year career to helping black women.
"The girls don't think they have to get married. I tell them children deserve a mama and a daddy. They really do," Carroll says from behind the desk of her office, which has cushioned pink-and-green armchairs, bars on the windows, and a wooden "LOVE" carving between two African figurines. Diamonds circle Carroll's ring finger.
As the issue of black unwed parenthood inches into public discourse, Carroll is among the few speaking boldly about it. And as a black woman who has brought thousands of babies into the world, who has sacrificed income to serve Houston's poor, Carroll is among the few whom black women will actually listen to.
"A mama can't give it all. And neither can a daddy, not by themselves," Carroll says. "Part of the reason is because you can only give that which you have. A mother cannot give all that a man can give. A truly involved father figure offers more fullness to a child's life."
Read more at: Blacks struggle with 72 percent unwed mothers rate
Are fathers no longer fathers simply because they are not husbands? I don't understand this logic......
Wear My Dawg's Hat
Superstar
Are fathers no longer fathers simply because they are not husbands? I don't understand this logic......
We get it. You have a different world view.
Some of us however, do believe that it is optimal for a father to live with his children and his wife/children's mother, co-nurture them directly on daily basis, and have the capacity to dine with them and tuck them in with bedtime stories every night possible.
Further, some of us do believe that a successful community for children is comprised of households where the majority of them are led by a married wife/mother and husband/father.
To suggest that there is no difference between a dedicated father living with his children, cooking for
them, playing with them everyday, attending parental conferences at school, putting them to bed nightly -- versus a non-residential biological father who might live thousands of miles away from his child (just a text away...) -- in my view, challenges basic logic (and as of today, all contemporary research on best outcomes for children and parents, as Dr. Natalie Carroll's comments reinforce).