Russell Wilson's Barber is a CAC

louisvandross

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Anybody ever seen those Middle Eastern or Indian barber videos on youtube? They cut your hair and then give you shoulder massages.
YOOOOOO the Last time I got my hair braided was by a bad (7 1/2 - 8) texan lady I had never met before. a quarter of the way through I squeeze into our convo that my neck was stiff & had been buggin me all morning, then proceed to show her the exact spot where it was hurtin. As Im saying this shes finishing whatever part of my hair she was working on, then started to massage my shoulders and neck! I didn't ask her to start rubbing me, she just did:ahh: As she's blessing my upper body she asks "is it feeling any better?" At this point two things are going through my mind
  1. How long can I keep this going?
  2. Even though she mentioned a husband earlier, had a Yolanda Adams ringtone, & was wearing a pair of these
    Cross-Earrings-Model.jpg

the only thing bothering me was the fact that I had just gotten back with my baby moms. :manny: Nothing wrong with making new friends tho :steviej:. She kept it going for almost two mins then got back to my hair. Since she was able to temporarily get rid of the pain I tried everything to get her going again, but she just laughed it off each time. On the outside i was :ufdup:, but inside I was very much :feedme:
 

mrken12

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You know what kills me about you guys. When whites say that all blacks are the same and then throw out some tired stereotypes of black males you all protest and yet you do it here on the coli to try and define what a "real" black person is, its mostly the same tired stereotypes. Congrats I guess

This nikka.
sQeATgt.png
 

beanz

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:mjlol: ya dudes hilarious

dominican barbers are the worst. i had one barber who was always drunk after 5pm on friday thru sunday. if u caught him after 5 u knew u would be outta that chair in less than half hour, but ur shyt might be fukked up. or it might be the most impeccable haircut ever :ohlawd:.

i had another one that always stepped out to make a phone call. he was a amateur rapper and he was always fronting like he was on the phone with a record label :stopitslime: talking about "i be back i got an important phone call with koch, u dont mind right?"

i had another one who wanted to kill another barber for cutting my hair. i came in and was like "yo wheres kelvin" and the other one was like ":manny: he left" so i sat down with him.. halfway thru, kelvin shows up like yo wtf and im like yo he said u left and he was like "I WENT TO THE STORE" and was about to kill the other one :pachaha: i had to stop a fight with a halfway done haircut.

i had one take a shyt in the middle of my haircut and he came back with his hands smelling like soap and shyt :mjlol:
 
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Broad Street Bully

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I got a female barber. She dont know shyt about sports and has a bluetooth. That shaves 15-20 min off of my cuts. My eastside barber when she aint available tho....nikka think he Kobe, dude lives to play ball, cuts in his basketball shorts and cut off tee, talks nonstop about the playoffs, has to stop my cuts to argue with other barbers about current events, Baby mama be calling him like shyt, he gotta go to the back of the shop to yell at her in privacy, nikka actually ate a 12 piece hot wing w/ french fries the same time he was cutting my head. Had my hairline smelling like lemon pepper :pacspit:
:russ: :laff: am crying
 

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I am white, but only ever went to barber's until recently.

This one guy used to be $5 a cut straight into the early 2000's, but was a down right, mad as fukk Polish drunk in his 70's.

You literally never knew how drunk he would be when you went in. If he wasn't too drunk, he was legit. He was the only barber around who could cut 'ethnic hair' so he could actually taper my damn neck.

BUT IF HE WAS REALLY DRUNK!???? This dude FELL ASLEEP STANDING UP WHILE CUTTING MY HAIR WITH THE CLIPPERS STILL MOVING!!!

I'm listening to him mumble in Polish about something, all slurred....and then he starts to get quieter, and quieter, while I can feel the clippers slowly slowing down on the back of my head. Then he just started rhythmically clipping the same spot over and over.

I can't see the mirror because I was looking down, but now it's been like a solid 45 seconds of him not talking and just making my neck raw. I manage to raise my head just enough to see the mirror and this dude is staring straight at the floor taking slow, deep breaths, with his clippers hand on autopilot and his other hand clutching the back of my chair for support.

I had a rash and broken skin for a week after that one.
 

KillbertArenas

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I got a female barber. She dont know shyt about sports and has a bluetooth. That shaves 15-20 min off of my cuts. My eastside barber when she aint available tho....nikka think he Kobe, dude lives to play ball, cuts in his basketball shorts and cut off tee, talks nonstop about the playoffs, has to stop my cuts to argue with other barbers about current events, Baby mama be calling him like shyt, he gotta go to the back of the shop to yell at her in privacy, nikka actually ate a 12 piece hot wing w/ french fries the same time he was cutting my head. Had my hairline smelling like lemon pepper :pacspit:


im dyinghhh....haaaa
 
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AkaDemiK

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I am white, but only ever went to barber's until recently.

This one guy used to be $5 a cut straight into the early 2000's, but was a down right, mad as fukk Polish drunk in his 70's.

You literally never knew how drunk he would be when you went in. If he wasn't too drunk, he was legit. He was the only barber around who could cut 'ethnic hair' so he could actually taper my damn neck.

BUT IF HE WAS REALLY DRUNK!???? This dude FELL ASLEEP STANDING UP WHILE CUTTING MY HAIR WITH THE CLIPPERS STILL MOVING!!!

I'm listening to him mumble in Polish about something, all slurred....and then he starts to get quieter, and quieter, while I can feel the clippers slowly slowing down on the back of my head. Then he just started rhythmically clipping the same spot over and over.

I can't see the mirror because I was looking down, but now it's been like a solid 45 seconds of him not talking and just making my neck raw. I manage to raise my head just enough to see the mirror and this dude is staring straight at the floor taking slow, deep breaths, with his clippers hand on autopilot and his other hand clutching the back of my chair for support.

I had a rash and broken skin for a week after that one.

:laff::laff::laff::laff::laff:
 
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My old barber cut hair, sold weed, cd's, dvd's, clothes, shoes, and fukking rims at the same damn time. I used to go early as shyt to avoid waiting 6 hours to get a cut and dude would still have me in the shop for like 2 hours. This nikka was always on the phone, or eating or doing everthing but cutting my shyt! I had to stop fukking with cus though because his cuts went up to $28 fukking dollars and he still expected a tip :dwillhuh:. I go to this little ass, hole in the wall Spanish joint and get a $12 cut that's close to if not better than my old spot and takes 30-45 minutes tops. Plus they shape you up with the straight razor and that's standard I don't gotta pay extra! That shyt is truly :blessed:
 
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MostReal

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Dude wanna come in here and cape for cacs...it's all jokes nikka. :marty:

no you didn't...dude brought out the Marty Mar :heh:

Russell Wilson is gonna be paid when he retires.

The fiscal conservativeness of going to Super Cuts. :ohlawd:

thread is mad hilarious. He looks like a Fiscal Conservative too :pachaha:
 
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