Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

The ADD

Old Master
Joined
May 11, 2012
Messages
47,769
Reputation
6,077
Daps
97,629
Any tips on not being the “safe” guy or the Russell type or broke women who want you after Quantavious?

Bout to just stay single & pass em
They won’t think you are safe if you tell them at the start you only want something physical.

Why are broke women on the menu?
 

Brandsdale

Big Yella
Joined
Nov 5, 2012
Messages
10,233
Reputation
1,020
Daps
16,237
Reppin
T-Dot


Interesting cause I never pictured Jessica Alba to be a bytch like that. Salute to Jensen for putttin her in her place and being humble about it after :ehh:
 
Last edited:

Lieutenant Daniels

I’m up for Major
Joined
Mar 11, 2022
Messages
1,376
Reputation
806
Daps
8,375
Reppin
Major case squad


The comments on this post are enlightening and sad. Chick's talking about getting panic attacks around relationships.

So many damaged people out here. You find a good match that is open to working together on a healthy relationship best to lock them down as what's mostly out here is bad product.


A lot of those girls don’t wanna be held accountable for anything. Relationships equal accountability so it’s easier to live in their own bubble making dumb ass decisions with no accountability. Plus these chicks be knowing they ain’t shyt so they be projecting their personal mental weaknesses on new dating prospects.

What they don’t realize is the more years they accumulate ducking a meaningful relationship for being in situationships the more damaged they become so when they finally get over that “anxiety” it’s too late
 

Ahadi

Veteran
Joined
Aug 7, 2019
Messages
22,776
Reputation
3,328
Daps
93,503
They won’t think you are safe if you tell them at the start you only want something physical.

Why are broke women on the menu?

Agreed.

I’m not sure, like for example this new one I’m hanging out with, we were talking and she mentions about “how she dreams of meeting someone like me & how when she was younger she wasn’t ready to accept love from someone like me” (she’s older than me, didn’t have the greatest example of a father either) the type that had a list, but then hit a certain age and got rid of the “list”

It just turns me off. Granted again, this is why I should stick to dating younger and avoid older / peer group (30s)

But like I said, I’m not sure what I’m doing besides being stable & having my ish together.
 

The ADD

Old Master
Joined
May 11, 2012
Messages
47,769
Reputation
6,077
Daps
97,629
Agreed.

I’m not sure, like for example this new one I’m hanging out with, we were talking and she mentions about “how she dreams of meeting someone like me & how when she was younger she wasn’t ready to accept love from someone like me” (she’s older than me, didn’t have the greatest example of a father either) the type that had a list, but then hit a certain age and got rid of the “list”

It just turns me off. Granted again, this is why I should stick to dating younger and avoid older / peer group (30s)

But like I said, I’m not sure what I’m doing besides being stable & having my ish together.
Honestly that’s part of getting older and being single.

I’m not saying if she was with the worst types of dudes and there are scars you go with it. That said the odds that you are going to get older and check every box she previously had are unlikely. She would likely have to accept the same from you.
 

Braman

Superstar
Joined
Mar 11, 2022
Messages
13,799
Reputation
3,054
Daps
55,630
Never add a chick on ig if you’ve already met/dated/smashed

There’s chicks ive smashed and had doin all sorts of thot activities ….add them on ig and they cocky now :heh:

We probably can’t even fathom the amount of thirst they get in them DM’s, it gasses their head up and merely the fact your message is on that platform puts you in that box
 

re'up

Veteran
Joined
May 26, 2012
Messages
20,614
Reputation
6,212
Daps
64,496
Reppin
San Diego
Think you can probably point to social media as a major form of relationship anxiety causes

Few off the top:

-The performative nature of the relationship on social media, the idea that you could start posting pics with a guy for a few weeks or months, and then break up or whatever, and your narrative is now changed/weaker, your identity/brand takes a hit

example: you rant and rave on social media and in person about husbands and kids and family, and only want a husband, and then meet someone, and break up 3 months later, you now look foolish or diminished, like your identity as a traditional woman is in question

I know women who clear out all their social media after a break up, an attempt to cleanse, or delete all the pics of the person, an attempt essentially to save the brand.

there's an inverse for men too, where you rant and rave about a good woman, I found a good one, (she's faithful and therefore I am wise is the subtext) and then the same thing happens. Your expectations are not met. And everyone knows. Your judgement is questioned. You look foolish in your own little world.

-The ever tightening and changing rules around things like cheating

everyone is hyper paranoid and hyper vigilant about not only their girl/boy friends behavior in person, but on half a dozen apps. It raises all these questions: who can tag you? Can you tag people? can you like people's pics? Can you DM people? Can you read your DM's? How many pics should you post?

People are the most rule based and intolerant that I have ever seen in my lifetime, because there's so many new spaces to navigate for them.
 
Last edited:

Double Burger With Cheese

Veteran
Supporter
Joined
May 6, 2012
Messages
26,375
Reputation
16,025
Daps
155,936
Reppin
Atlanta
Think you can probably point to social media as a major form of relationship anxiety causes

Few off the top:

-The performative nature of the relationship on social media, the idea that you could start posting pics with a guy for a few weeks or months, and then break up or whatever, and your narrative is now changed/weaker, your identity/brand takes a hit

example: you rant and rave on social media and in person about husbands and kids and family, and only want a husband, and then meet someone, and break up 3 months later, you now look foolish or diminished, like your identity as a traditional woman is in question

I know women who clear out all their social media after a break up, an attempt to cleanse, or delete all the pics of the person, an attempt essentially to save the brand.

there's an inverse for men too, where you rant and rave about a good woman, and then the same thing happens. Your expectations are not met.

-The ever tightening and changing rules around things like cheating

everyone is hyper paranoid and hyper vigilant about not only their girl/boy friends behavior in person, but on half a dozen apps. It raises all these questions: who can tag you? Can you tag people? can you like people's pics? Can you DM people? Can you read your DM's? How many pics should you post?

People are the most rule based and intolerant that I have ever seen in my lifetime, because there's so many new spaces to navigate for them.

I don’t have social media at all. I do have one for my business but my business partner runs that. I can’t even view our post cause I don’t even have IG on my phone.

So I’m somewhat out the loop on this IG/social media shyt. I still get hella bytches and I have no idea or give two fukk what they doing on the internet/social media.

I be feeling so care free being out the loop of all that shyt. I believe all that shyt is for women anyway.

My nikkas do be knocking hella chicks down off IG. I’m in the field with it though
 

Tommy Lee Jones

All Star
Joined
Jan 1, 2015
Messages
3,336
Reputation
411
Daps
9,447
what kinda questions you asking a woman to vet her as you date her? We've been dating a month and getting to know each other. Feel like still need to vet her tho.
 

re'up

Veteran
Joined
May 26, 2012
Messages
20,614
Reputation
6,212
Daps
64,496
Reppin
San Diego
I don’t have social media at all. I do have one for my business but my business partner runs that. I can’t even view our post cause I don’t even have IG on my phone.

So I’m somewhat out the loop on this IG/social media shyt. I still get hella bytches and I have no idea or give two fukk what they doing on the internet/social media.

I be feeling so care free being out the loop of all that shyt. I believe all that shyt is for women anyway.

My nikkas do be knocking hella chicks down off IG. I’m in the field with it though

Same as you. Never had any social media, not one app, ever. meet all kinds of women from friend circles, just out, at parties, in the neighborhood. so relieved that I never got into any of that at all. Feels very free and clean. Like I don't want that ugliness on me.

And after reading like now, maybe 6 books about social media,and watching all of it play out over the last 15 years or so, I had some of the same concerns way back when, around 2014 I noticed that you could have to keep changing and reforming your profile, or be kind of obsolete. FB to insta, instagram to Snap, snap to Tik Tok, and also change your approach for each new platform. How much effort and work all that would take.

for sure I could have connected with people more from school or wherever in the past, maybe had some business that missed me, but overall, I am comfortable with that decision.

you never see any women going through their feed while in bed? it gives me a panic attack watching that void.
 

Double Burger With Cheese

Veteran
Supporter
Joined
May 6, 2012
Messages
26,375
Reputation
16,025
Daps
155,936
Reppin
Atlanta
Same as you. Never had any social media, not one app, ever. meet all kinds of women from friend circles, just out, at parties, in the neighborhood. so relieved that I never got into any of that at all. Feels very free and clean. Like I don't want that ugliness on me.

And after reading like now, maybe 6 books about social media,and watching all of it play out over the last 15 years or so, I had some of the same concerns way back when, around 2014 I noticed that you could have to keep changing and reforming your profile, or be kind of obsolete. FB to insta, instagram to Snap, snap to Tik Tok, and also change your approach for each new platform. How much effort and work all that would take.

for sure I could have connected with people more from school or wherever in the past, maybe had some business that missed me, but overall, I am comfortable with that decision.

you never see any women going through their feed while in bed? it gives me a panic attack watching that void.

Yeah most women always on social media. They be scrolling through all kind of shyt. It’s a time filler when they not engaged in real life. I can’t be too critical cause the coli would be my social media but this not the same as IG.

I don’t think it ever used to bother me but I’m desensitized to that shyt. Only time it used to get on my nerves was when I used to take chicks to Atlanta Hawks games and they would be taking selfies and in they phone. I’m a die hard NBA fan and used to be low key annoyed. Like I wanted they ass to be watching the game intensely like me lol

But yeah, without that social media shyt you kind of feel free. Like you not in the cycle of whatever most the world in. It’s such a normal part of society at this point, but I’m still perplexed on how we got here
 

WIA20XX

Superstar
Joined
May 24, 2022
Messages
6,405
Reputation
3,064
Daps
20,245
what kinda questions you asking a woman to vet her as you date her? We've been dating a month and getting to know each other. Feel like still need to vet her tho.

Paper Requirements
  • Cultural Background
  • Current Education
    • Future - is she going back to school (hard pass for me)
  • Job/Profession
    • nurturing profession
    • Ball busting profession
  • Hobbies
    • Hiking? We're not compatible
  • Homebody/out all the time?
    • at the club on a Tuesday night?
  • Foodie/Normal
    • She gotta try something she saw her GF do on IG
  • Sports team affiliation
  • Family Background
    • same area, same culture, same economics
  • Family Closeness
    • Lotta Afro Latinas see extended family REGULARLY.
    • She talk to Mom/sisters every day
  • Family Medical History
    • Is mama going crazy?
  • Friends
    • A bunch of guttersnipes headed to Miami every 3 months?
    • She's the last friend in her group to not be married?
    • A lot of single moms in her squad
    • She hit the club and hugs up on every guy
  • Can have children
  • Wants children
    • See Sofia Vergara
  • Birth Control
    • she's on the pill/IUD
  • Is she on anti-depressants
  • Drug and Alcohol Use
    • she like a lil bit of meth in her J's
  • Religious
    • devout? or a Easter Christian or god forbid, she's "spiritual"
I wouldn't ask these things one after another. You can usually pick up on these things in conversation. The medical stuff might be tougher, but it's necessary to find out.

The real stuff you need to know
  • Relationship history - so you went through all these d-boys, now you want to date a real baller? FOH.
  • Attitudes around sex match up with your own
  • Does she look at the bright side of things? Or is she eternally negative?
  • Is she an LSA level gossip and hater?
  • How she feels about your hobbies
    • is she gonna interrupt your video games/anime/MCU with her BS
  • Is she gonna volunteer YOUR pick up truck to go move her FRIEND'S couch?
  • Are you automatically on the grill after a 12 hour shift, cause her good for nothing cousins and sistas are coming over
  • Is this broad finna go in your closet to show off all your ties, suits, dress shirts, and shoes to her friends?
  • She gonna borrow your car and tell you that the new dent was already there?
  • Do you take her to her favorite restaurant and all she does is complain?
Etc. Just go through your past dates and relationships and try and recall all the joy and also all the pain.

I got some real specific stuff I look for, based on the girls I've dated.

I used to be cool with weed smoking broads, not no more. Keep in mind, I'm dating chicks with degrees and good jobs, they still wanna smoke up or eat a brownie. We're not compatible, cause we have different values.
 
Top