Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[buzzkill]

your post is contradictory which means you dont know what you want. You shouldn't settle down because you found a 'good woman', you should settle down because you want to.

Right now you dont have the ability to even lead a woman because you letting her dictate if you want to settle down or not lol.

Man just have fun, take career risk, and then at 30-35 write down what you feel you need from a woman and then use that to drive your vetting. Dudes be calling chicks wifey cause she nice, well thats just basic human decency lol.

I guess I'm on the fence because im starting to get tired of all these random women, getting to know them, maintaining a rotation and that drive to start a family is starting to kick in. I disagree with letting a woman dictate if i want to settle down. I should clarify i am very open to slowing down and getting a girl if I meet the right one but i am having fun in the mean time. I guess I should just keep having fun til my 30s like u said and chill out and discover more red flags i wasnt aware of.

No offense but it sounds like y’all were FWB that got along well. Nothing wrong with that but if she’s really sick you are way down on the priority list.

We were definitely just in the dating stage not yet serious but seemed like it was headed that way. Even my boy was surprised by this and said damn she seemed like she was really fukking with u. but yeah u right im most likely not a priority right now lol i will move accordingly

 

[jesc07]

No offense but it sounds like y’all were FWB that got along well. Nothing wrong with that but if she’s really sick you are way down on the priority list.

Bingo. Not even worth his time.

 

[Apollo Creed]

I guess I'm on the fence because im starting to get tired of all these random women, getting to know them, maintaining a rotation and that drive to start a family is starting to kick in. I disagree with letting a woman dictate if i want to settle down. I should clarify i am very open to slowing down and getting a girl if I meet the right one but i am having fun in the mean time. I guess I should just keep having fun til my 30s like u said and chill out and discover more red flags i wasnt aware of.



We were definitely just in the dating stage not yet serious but seemed like it was headed that way. Even my boy was surprised by this and said damn she seemed like she was really fukking with u. but yeah u right im most likely not a priority right now lol i will move accordingly

my comment was based on you saying settle down when you find a good girl, I'm saying thats you letting the woman dictate the terms.

You need to ask yourself what kind of home you want to lead if you even want to be seen as a leader.

We think because we like someone that = ready to get married = ready for the responsibility that comes with it.

And I didnt say red flags to look for, I said define your requirements. We do all this mindless dating and stick with people who are cool but we know in our heart they dont meet our requirements hence why we end up in eternal 'boyfriend/girlfriend' situations that lead nowhere.

 

[buzzkill]

my comment was based on you saying settle down when you find a good girl, I'm saying thats you letting the woman dictate the terms.

You need to ask yourself what kind of home you want to lead if you even want to be seen as a leader.

We think because we like someone that = ready to get married = ready for the responsibility that comes with it.

And I didnt say red flags to look for, I said define your requirements. We do all this mindless dating and stick with people who are cool but we know in our heart they dont meet our requirements hence why we end up in eternal 'boyfriend/girlfriend' situations that lead nowhere.

Makes sense

Bingo. Not even worth his time.

Yeah I just needed different opinions. Think I'm just going to fall back and check on her recovering as a friend every once and a while. If she comes back and her story checks out cool ... if not it wasn't meant to be...

 

[J.E.T.S]

Definitely some unresolved trauma and abandonment issues going on, this will be my third time seeking some type of therapy this time in the psychiatrist form instead of regular therapist. No excuse though

bruh. I don’t feel so bad about my situation after seeing yo shyt.

 

[EffYou]

How many of you are worried about “dead bedroom” with a future wife?

 

[buzzkill]

How many of you are worried about “dead bedroom” with a future wife?

scary to think about but im just dedicated to keeping myself in shape for life and require (listing my requirements like my boy said to do) physically active/ fit women. So on that side I'm doing everything in my control to avoid not being physically attractive or having a physically unattractive wife in the future.

Ive never been married but i would assume the only other reasons was because one of yall is either emotionally or physically cheating, checked out of the relationship, stressed tf out or kids etc.

Im only worried about what is in my control... i cant really worry about whats out of my control...still scary though

 

[Killigraphy]

I guess Im on the fence then. Since I'm 28 and finally am hitting financial and career goals, I am having fun right now but if i meet a good woman i would settle down. Of course I do red flag vetting and all that. With her we started casual (i even told her that when we first started texting and she was cool with it so i wasnt playing bf) but we synced instantly and were fukking with each other heavy sleep overs every weekend and all that and she seemed like a good woman to lock down no real red flags from her and things were going extra smooth until this.

No matter how much you like her, how different she seems, how well you vibe, all women are the same. You can accept that, adapt and learn to be colder with her child like behavior. Or deny it and settle. That doesn't mean you're gonna have bad times, just means you'll more than likely enable her behavior. At the rate and downfall of marriage, I doubt you'll marry (if you're smart), but you can teach women you fukk with, how to be better at treating you right....since they failed with themselves.

 

[buzzkill]

No matter how much you like her, how different she seems, how well you vibe, all women are the same. You can accept that, adapt and learn to be colder with her child like behavior. Or deny it and settle. That doesn't mean you're gonna have bad times, just means you'll more than likely enable her behavior. At the rate and downfall of marriage, I doubt you'll marry (if you're smart), but you can teach women you fukk with, how to be better at treating you right....since they failed with themselves.

This is facts but i am already pretty cold to childlike behavior. I wanted to see what yall thought because i wasn't sure about her story or how to proceed. But like breh said we only been dating for a few months still in the early/fwb stage. She probably is sick im just not a priority atm which is understandable.

 

[Killigraphy]

This is facts but i am already pretty cold to childlike behavior. I wanted to see what yall thought because i wasn't sure about her story or how to proceed. But like breh said we only been dating for a few months still in the early/fwb stage. She probably is sick im just not a priority atm which is understandable.

You know whats really gonna bother you forever? That you're smart and well off enough to know not to deal with the bullshyt....and you're going to do it anyway. So if we know how the book begins and ends, we can certainly control how the middle plays out. If you're going to "deal" with any of them. Make sure they're playing your game. Every good student had a great teacher.

 

[Apollo Creed]

How many of you are worried about “dead bedroom” with a future wife?

stay on your A game so your wife always fears you leaving/another chick taking you lol

The moment she sees you are comfortable she feels she has conquered you and will no longer try.

 

[buzzkill]

You know whats really gonna bother you forever? That you're smart and well off enough to know not to deal with the bullshyt....and you're going to do it anyway. So if we know how the book begins and ends, we can certainly control how the middle plays out. If you're going to "deal" with any of them. Make sure they're playing your game. Every good student had a great teacher.

u mean like settling down or getting married? im not sure what bullshyt u mean but I understand the message and im listening.

 

[EffYou]

stay on your A game so your wife always fears you leaving/another chick taking you lol

The moment she sees you are comfortable she feels she has conquered you and will no longer try.

Eh.. too much work shawty can just bounce

 

[Killigraphy]

u mean like settling down or getting married? im not sure what bullshyt u mean but I understand the message and im listening.

shyt tests, choosing moments of being disrespectful, pettiness, and all around behaviors exhibited by women of all ilks. Now shutting that shyt down, can be vexing, but I always say to every man I know, never lose a battle or a war. Give them nothing, but take from them everything. That's the ultimate conundrum for smart men, we don't want to play the game, but we don't want to lose either....as competitive as I am, I'll never be talked down to by a woman, let alone think she's gonna get away with even something small like a snide comment. I'm always in shutting shyt down mode, which I know can be tiring for the majority of men, they just rather pay their toll with settling, castrating themselves with silence.

 

[buzzkill]

shyt tests, choosing moments of being disrespectful, pettiness, and all around behaviors exhibited by women of all ilks. Now shutting that shyt down, can be vexing, but I always say to every man I know, never lose a battle or a war. Give them nothing, but take from them everything. That's the ultimate conundrum for smart men, we don't want to play the game, but we don't want to lose either....as competitive as I am, I'll never be talked down to by a woman, let alone think she's gonna get away with even something small like a snide comment. I'm always in shutting shyt down mode, which I know can be tiring for the majority of men, they just rather pay their toll with settling, castrating themselves with silence.

ah i got u. yeah man im with u. im not about to chase her for sure and if shes lying she wont hear from me again thats the only silence from me. time will tell