Question: When married cats say DON'T get married...
- Thread starter YBE
- Start date
type deals or a "I stood over our bed with a knife in my hand" 
type deal.
Emperor Sol
Knowledge and Wisdom
Very serious. They were dumb enough to put the ring on the finger of a psycho bytch just because she looked good to them 
.. Their fault 
.. Their fault 
they are trying to kick knowledge to the younglings but the younglings think they know more, and "you just chose the wrong girl man"
Is this not true?
You have to be a complete idiot to write off a whole bunch of people because you are a bad judge of character. Hell, even if you aren't and that person switched on you...how do you write off an entire group of people based on the actions of one? That's right up there with Klan member-think.
BlvdBrawler
Superstar
Nobody is writing off a whole bunch of people, but rather the institution itself.
Nobody is saying, "You shouldn't mess with women.", they're essentially just saying, "Don't sign that contract.".
Edit: And as a guy who's heard this numerous times, I'd say they're being 80% serious, 20% joking. This is always preceded by "I love my wife and kids, but if I could go back and do it again, I wouldn't get married."
Family Man
Banned
I've been married for seven years (Got married at 22) and it's the best decision I've ever made. More black people need to be getting married.
Family Man
Banned
basically.
Just provide 3 benefits to getting married J-Lova.
We dont got all day so hurry
This was directed at J-Lover but I'll answer from my perspective.
1. Greater financial security. Quicker way to building wealth and consolidating it.
2. Stability
3. Raising children (got a kid on the way)
I'm currently going through a divorce.
If you're going to get married, understand what the legal implications are if it doesn't work it.
Being happily married is one of the greatest feelings in life.
It's when things get bad, it is much harder to leave, and when or if you do decide to leave, the consequences are very severe. Let me sum them up in 4 words
Visitation, Alimony, Child Support
My advice would be to not get married because you are in love. Do not get married because you want to start a family. Get married when you make the conscious decision to become one with another person, because if you can't put your individual nature aside for the sake of the marriage, your marriage will fail. Be prepared to deal with the ups and downs, and as long as you look at you and your spouse as one, you will be forced to fight it out to make it work.
I wouldn't get married again no time soon, but I wouldn't completely take it out of consideration.
And for those people thinking it is about a judge of bad character, that is far from the truth in many cases. People change, and you have to adapt. It's more about people wanting to stay together and keeping on pace with each other.
Just my 2 cents.
If you're going to get married, understand what the legal implications are if it doesn't work it.
Being happily married is one of the greatest feelings in life.
It's when things get bad, it is much harder to leave, and when or if you do decide to leave, the consequences are very severe. Let me sum them up in 4 words
Visitation, Alimony, Child Support
My advice would be to not get married because you are in love. Do not get married because you want to start a family. Get married when you make the conscious decision to become one with another person, because if you can't put your individual nature aside for the sake of the marriage, your marriage will fail. Be prepared to deal with the ups and downs, and as long as you look at you and your spouse as one, you will be forced to fight it out to make it work.
I wouldn't get married again no time soon, but I wouldn't completely take it out of consideration.
And for those people thinking it is about a judge of bad character, that is far from the truth in many cases. People change, and you have to adapt. It's more about people wanting to stay together and keeping on pace with each other.
Just my 2 cents.
BlvdBrawler
Superstar
Raising a child in a classic, nuclear family is the only real benefit. You don't need to be married for the other two listed here.
This is ridiculous. If dude was happy with his wife, he wouldn't be telling others to not get married.
Just like the clowns in here who have had shytty relationships and are telling others to just play the field.
There are no secrets with marriage. You know exactly what it entails. The only unknown is how your "wife" is going to act within the marriage.
Family Man
Banned
You don't need the other two but it does help a hell of a lot. Particularly when you're in your 20s and just really starting out. I wouldn't be where I'm at right now if it wasn't for my wife. The same goes for her too.
Still aint getting married though
Ive seen too much pain and heartache. Your right people change if you dont like who they become why be stuck?
You can be with someone without having the title but folks fall for the hook
This. And of course not all marriages end because one individual is a bad judge of character, but a lot of times it does. Lets not act like all marriages end because "people change". Yea, sometimes that's true, but some folk get married for the wrong reasons and are typically blinded.
Marrying for love is not enough. You also have to protect yourself so you don't "get got".
