wet landscapes
ghost
2x
gurlllll!!!!I'm watching Naked and Afraid: Cambodia. This chick's accent is irritating. She keeps calling the other guy diluted. I'm like bytch, do you mean deluded?
After the stories I've heard and read this weekend, my dreams of being in a relationship died. I know that I'm a very emotional person and I don't see myself being able to recover from cheating, disease or general betrayal. Plus you can't guarantee forever. I don't want someone to feel "stuck" with me or vice versa. I feel it's a reason God has kept me from it. Everything you want you aren't meant to have.
*Kirk Franklin "More Than I can Bear" plays in the background*
Whoa whoa, don't let other people situations make you doubt yours or what you can have. There are plenty of people who have positive stories, as well as those who went through something they thought was the end of them, found love with the right one and healed. Even if they didn't move on with another person they recovered. I'm sure you have been places in life you felt you couldn't handle and you are miles from it now. Maybe he kept it from you because you weren't ready and when you have it, you will be able to handle whatever comes with it.
I feel you. I just really don't see myself opening up to it. I shut down more and more everyday. I don't know, plus I'm old. Like who looks for relationships at damn near 40? I feel like it's kind of juvenile for me to want it if that makes sense. I don't know it's a lot of thoughts floating around. I'll just take some time to iron them out. If it's meant for me to have then I guess I'll have it but I'm not trying anymore. At least right now.
Thank youIt is human to seek companionship at any age. It's people getting married at 50+. I understand what you are saying though. I think the biggest mistake we make is putting age limits and time tables on ourself. I felt so much better once I stopped. I also know sometimes we need to wallow in our thoughts and vent. It's ok to stop trying too, sometimes that's exactly what you need to do so it can work itself out.
Thank you
I think I'm going to chill right now. I'm literally on status reading that relationship thread. Plus I heard some crazy stories this weekend talking to my home girl. It was very overwhelming. I think I may also take some time to research controlling your emotions. Perhaps pick up a book at the library or something. It can only help.