I have 7 days to become as White as possible...help me (Serious Thread)

Giselle

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Watch/read the news (sports/entertainment/science,tech&business section) that week. The news always has somthing to talk about. Avoid religion and politics. Be the professional version of yourself. Some white people like to feel cool and hip and may see you as cool and hip (b/c you're black) and try to get to know what you like. They may even try to use cool and hip words that they think you use. Others want you to be more like them. It could go either way, really.
Just hear me out.

I'm working a corporate type job where networks and connections are the only ways to get ahead/get promotions etc. There's a dinner coming up where all the "shoe-ins" for promotions are going to be attending and I got an invite as well :blessed:
The only problem is these are some WHITE ass people. I mean high shorts and Crocs type dudes and Katy Perry listening red wine drinking white women. I need to rub elbows with these people and get into their circle, but I would like to do this without compromising any melanin.

I'll be sitting at a table for dinner with these people. What the hell am I supposed to talk about with them outside of work? I imagine most of the conversation will be about skiing, hiking, and mayonnaise, all of which I have little to no experience with.

Corporate brehs, how do you successfully interact with super-white people on a social level without c00ning?
Before anyone comes at me with that "Be yourself and talk about your interests" shyt, I can tell you right now that will not work, as I doubt these people are interested in East Coast rap, video games, and Bernie Sanders.

TL;DR: WHAT DO WHITE PEOPLE TALK ABOUT?
Don't take the thread title too seriously. I'm not trying to be 'white'. I just need advice on how to interact with people of entirely different cultural backgrounds on a social level.
 
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