I had an affair in 2015. My wife called my side chick this morning.

[BedRoomI'z]

Wow..
Keep your head up, brotha.
It's gonna smooth out sooner or later.

 

[BedRoomI'z]

Another lesson in really vetting people before we jump into major relationships with them. Take time, please!

 

[Dameon Farrow]

This is why I personally am not crazy about marriage. I know I love access to multiple females. I'm in a relationship now and I'm behaving but....

Naive folks tend to think marriages fix problems when in reality it compounds them. A lot has to be ironed out before the vows come into play. I know I need to be ironed. Not rushing into marriage.

 

[HabitualLineSteppa]

Thanks for sharing OP and the update...Life is something else man...Best of luck to you brethren...

 

[Kasgoinjail]

I feel for your daughter, mother coming and going?

Thread is just pain, could be on tv

 

[NoMoreWhiteWoman2020]

Thanks for sharing OP and the update...Life is something else man...Best of luck to you brethren...

thanks breh. shyt has been fukking me up, having me second-guessing life decisions like a muhfukka. But, I always bring myself back to the conclusion that I can't look backwards. I am being pressed for another divorce, I don't have money for this shyt but she thinks I do because I am in college, in the midst of this I still have to live around her and keep paying for her existence, shyt is mind-numbing. And through all of that, I still wish that she would just mature up, and stick it at least until nikkas is stable. I never really wanted to keep my daughter from her because I know important it is for a girl to have a relationship with her mom, but I can't have her living with her while she is unstable af. So its a custody battle too looming.

I feel for your daughter, mother coming and going?

Thread is just pain, could be on tv

Ive been taking major steps to mitigate that shyt. Talking with her often about other things. She is a little artist and she loves Minecraft, I let her focus on that and schoolwork and try to keep her out of grown folks business.

 

[getmoney310cpt]

why do you nikkas get money and get married? if you woulda been on your fukk a bytch shyt you'd be chillin right now able to cut ties and not worry about paying this bytch...now you gotta pay this bytch....and raise a kid by a bytch you dont even feel the same about anymore....I can see a nikka knocking a bytch up shyt happens BUT why you nikkas get married in this day and age is insane to me....good luck breh

 

[Travis]

your going to lose alot of money this is way men should never get married.

 

[Poitier]

You really shouldn't have bumped this, breh.

 

[Neuromancer]

Update- a lot of shyt has transpired since I last shared. I'll try to start from the top.

I took the advice of a lot of folks from this thread, and went and got some therapy. It has helped. I started it back in October when another side chick filed a lawsuit against me for 1500 dollars. Petty ass shyt. I beat the case, but it hit me hard, because it was a public thing, and we work in the same circles, so people were able to know about it.

I resolve all that, and op top of it handle all the academic shyt, family and personal life. Me and my estranged wife are living together, but there is a physical and emotional distance during the pregnancy. I can't speak for her, but I never wanted to have sex, because I did not want to have sex with her while she carried another mans baby. Maybe I could cross that line down the road after the pregnancy, but I couldn't at that moment.

The baby is born, healthy and beautiful! I determined in my mind that I would never let her think that she was less to me. I was going to love her as my daughter, but I thought it should be an unspoken rule that you don't go back to your baby daddy. I was wrong.

As soon as this muhfukka had the baby, she starts tripping out again, acting irrational and abusive, and this culminates with her telling me that she has had contact with the baby father, showed him pics, and actually talked about money with him.
This crossed the line, because I was putting 2 n 2 together for a while.
1. Now on my bday, she gave me a 100 dollars even though she doesn't have any form of income beside me. If I haven't given you that, where did you get it?
2. When she told me that she talked back to him, it made me question her whole abuse story that she gave initially. This muhfukka really set me up like Denzel off of Training Day
3. She felt confident enough to say it to my face. That lets me know they been concocting this for a while. But I could be mistaken.

shyt has been rough, because throughout all the bs, I love the baby. She didn't get a choice in none of this, and I named her Angela after Angela Yvonne Davis. I built up a serious bond with her, and when she told me about the bd, I had a small breakdown because I don't take death very good and it felt like I had just lost a child because I knew that I would never have that true father role in her life. That sent me into therapy again. So now I'm faced with a divorce for the second time in two years, raising my daughter by myself again, and mitigating the damage.

I can't wait till this situation is resolved for good.

So, yeah.
That leaves me here today, still blessed and following my dreams, but telling y'all my story so that you may be more wiser than me when you pick out your spouses.

sorry to hear this bro. You need to get that divorce this time around. Don't put yourself through this.

 

[NoMoreWhiteWoman2020]

You really shouldn't have bumped this, breh.

Why not? I don't live in fear, and getting my story off my chest helps me move forward. I've made mistakes along the road, and instead of just criticizing lil nikkas I'm actually trying to give them a cautionary tale on making sure they pick the right one.

 

[Poitier]

Why not? I don't live in fear, and getting my story off my chest helps me move forward. I've made mistakes along the road, and instead of just criticizing lil nikkas I'm actually trying to give them a cautionary tale on making sure they pick the right one.

I generally thinking oversharing is bad, especially when it deals with personal trauma unless this is therapeutic for you? Yeah, I get and respect the cautionary tale stuff but is this really any different than a lot of the stuff already on the net? I mean this is a site where #GMB is a meme.

 

[Mr Hate Coffee]

Yikes. Ain't no advice anyone on the coli can really give you. I wish the best for you tho.

Not gonna judge you like a lot of folks. Nobody's perfect.

 

[NoMoreWhiteWoman2020]

I generally thinking oversharing is bad, especially when it deals with personal trauma unless this is therapeutic for you? Yeah, I get and respect the cautionary tale stuff but is this really any different than a lot of the stuff already on the net? I mean this is a site where #GMB is a meme.

I'm glad people are beginning to take marriage seriously, and entering into mutually beneficial relationships. I'm not dropping names, and its not like I can be extorted or some shyt. I might get clowned, but I'm human. At the end of the day, I'm gucci. Pops and life both taught me not to talk about this with many men and "friends" because them nikkas use that as an excuse to come in and fukk. So I felt more comfortable sharing over here.

 

[International Playa]

I generally thinking oversharing is bad, especially when it deals with personal trauma unless this is therapeutic for you? Yeah, I get and respect the cautionary tale stuff but is this really any different than a lot of the stuff already on the net? I mean this is a site where #GMB is a meme.

His story is a cautionary tale, man. So many of us guys end up with the wrong females because of being hooked to sex or how she makes us feel.

I nearly wifed a single mother who didn't love me, she saw me as food, a good provider for her & her child. Once she revealed to me that if she didn't have a kid, she wouldn't have dated me, I immediately took the exit doors.

It helps hearing stories like these, you vet every female you date before you marry her. You learn what to look for when marrying a woman, many men dont get that advice on marrying that right women, dudes learn it too late