I got an email on my phone that I figured was spam. It was from "Sams Club" and it had a list of a few items "on sale only today for members only" I was like
. I scroll through a couple of items and I saw chicken thighs and was like
this spam thing is getting out of control. Basically if you google or search shyt on your phone, similar to how you get popup ads relative to shyt you google or search for, if you have phone for some reason it can trigger random spam messages to accounts associated with your phone.
As Im swipin out I saw it said something about a new location, one closer to me, so I open the email back up scroll through a few of the items they have on sale which are relative to shyt ive looked for on my phone "coincidentally" and I get to the location and it happens to be near a walmart that I know of but I didnt know there was a Sam's there so I google it, and there is a Sam's there it's just down the street a little.
Long story short I drive to the Sam's see the chicken sale and im like...somethin's wrong with them, the sale date or something. I leave because Im skeptical, yet there is walmart, target, and a grocery store within the same shopping area, so I end up goin to all 3 and lookin at chicken, they all had the same dates, weights and sizes...so I ended up copping 36 thighs for like $15.
I get home, set the chicken down, light up the chimney starter, while that's goin I start to rub down the chicken and shyt. I get the chicken on at about 7:30pm. Ive cooked them so much that it's like muscle memory. I go back out flip'em once and turn'em. Go back in the house to do some other shyt and then it got to the point where they are usually done, so I go to get my digital thermometer (the stick) and it's gone. I had the shyt earlier, but it's gone. I look for it for about 10 mins, to no avail as I begin to consider the quality of my chicken. So I grab this old stick needle thermometer. I put it in and it says my temp is 120....im like "
" and one part of me is thinking "this piece of shyt aint calibrated plus since its a piece of shyt needle thermometer it took like 60 seconds for it to wind all the way up to 120 degrees" and im starting to get pissed off, but then another part of me is thinking "it's 50 degrees and kind of windy, so it might be a little different" my heat on the grill was screamin so even if it was 2 degrees out it wouldnt matter but im tryin to be an optimist.
The sun went down somewhere in the 8:15 to 8:30 range. Thermometer is still readin 120. So I say fukk it, I load some coals in the chimney and was just going to scrap this batch of chicken, so 20 mins later my coals are ready, I kept the top closed the entire time, loaded the new coals kept the lid shut for 10 mins...probed it, the dial finally moved past 120....but it took like 2 minutes. Now im kind of pissed, i know it's not working.
I say fukk it and go to grab my wireless digital thermometer the maverick et732...I pick up the foil pan with top (like for cookouts and shyt) and stuck to the bottom was my digital thermometer
it was stuck to the bottom somehow so when I lifted it up earlier to see if maybe I had set the foil pan over it while moving about the kitchen and when I lifted it up obviously the counter below it was bare (because it was stuck to the bottom of the pan)
anyway I probe the chicken with the needle thermometer, and it barely goes above 140 and yet again it took 1-2 minutes. I push the digital thermometer in and within 3 seconds it was at 180.
I checked all my chickens and they were well above 165. I kind of basted them everytime I was opening the lid, even though I had given up on them, I was so pissed off I was gonna throw them all in the trash. Once I got all the thighs off the grill and into the house, cleaned my grill (that is something I enjoy doing- dont know why
) I had did all my dishes, put everything away. I was gettin ready to throw all the chicken in the trash and for some reason I pulled a piece of the white meat from the bone and surprisingly, it wasnt dry and of course, my sauce was good. I ended up eating 2 pieces, it's not so bad.
I'm gonna keep it all and eat it until im tired of it, but the moral of the story is----
get or use good equipment also
be organized, know exactly where all your shyt is prior to putting your meat on the grill you dont want to end up looking for a bbq brush, or better yet your thermometer while your meat is cooking away.
i Ain't tasting no meats here
