we're both slaves to our drug of choice, there's no cure, just accept it
I over indulged and had too much. Assistant GM had to drive me home in the middle of my shift. Owner and GM had to let me go.
here's some suggestions for your next job so you don't get fired and put your family in the homeless shelter... mix vodka with smth cold and aromatic, i like cranberry juice. drink it normally, ppl drink alcohol in a more apprehensive way than they drink smth refreshing. don't overindulge by tryna get to an enjoyable level of drunkenness, pace yourself just enough to keep the shakes and bad thoughts away. no caffeine or uppers. a strong antiperspirant to keep the booze sweats down. altoids and gum and keep it consistent, nothing tells the boss "this guy's partying" like someone who never eats mints but downs them like an addict on some days. fruit snacks are another option so you can explain why your breath smells like cranberries all the time. learn breathing control so you don't mouth breathe, and make sure you stay downwind from ppl. if someone can't hear you back up and shout instead of coming closer. don't be your normal friendly self so you don't have to speak as much, pretend you're at a library or funeral or w/e. lower your productivity levels when you're sober so you seem to have a normal work output when you're wasted. good luck, i'm drunk 24/7 and i've never been caught, even during traffic stops.
edit: you worked in a KITCHEN? how does anyone back of house get fired for being under the influence of anything, how sloppy were you breh?