Get married or become a rest haven?

[Streetcar]

If u an ugly nikka thats all u will ever be

If you are you gotta get your money all the way up (mandatory anyway) and follow dudes like Patrice or Biggie.

But if you’re regular pockets, regular game and not #handsomegang times is gonna be tough.

 

[MikelArteta]

The thing I’ve learned in life is women come and women go. No need to be sad, worry or stress over it. Just enjoy the same way you do that box of pizza knowing you’ll get to that last slice and then it’s done.

 

[Jone2three45]

MAJORITY of marriages are this

 

[Bossino]

You’re a man and you shouldn’t be looking to a woman for emotional stability of any kind. My father has NEVER cried to my mother, never. There is a very good chance she will lose respect for you even if you don’t realize for years.

Go to your boys if you’re having issues. They’ll understand. Don’t be an emotionless robot but understand any weakness is innately unattractive to many of them.

Be irreplaceable brehs. That’s the key to respect in everything you do.

At this point in life I don't care to have a woman if I gotta do all this extra, frankly if I can't get real support from the woman (not wiping my tears), but noticing when a breh is mentally fatigued or allow me to occasionally get my shyt off about all the things we balance/manage as brehs/humans, outside of the time we're together.

If I gotta hide my struggles from the woman and put on a facade after I already bagged/claimed her she's essentially useless outside of child rearing and I'm not pressed for children.

I've watched my mom be able to read when my dad is mentally preoccupied and give him space, we lived in a 1 bedroom growing up and I'd hear them talking from the living room late at night/early morning about life, planning, regrets.

Make no mistake, there's hierarchy, but my mother has say, and complete dominion on certain things. It's like a President/VP power dynamic. I realize most modern women, and most women in my age group legitimately aren't reared for to be this type of woman anymore. My mom makes no pumpfakes on what she can and can't do. Everything she can do for self she does, and she maintains the home. Car issues ---> Dad, Bill Management ---> Dad, Financial Planning ---> Dad, and there's no friction because the roles are set.

Society moving away from defined gender roles in relationship has had and will continue to have long term ramifications, because a lot of people particularly women pumpfake on what they want to manage/be responsible for in a relationship as well as what they want. The "wants" is important as women's emotions are fleeting and men are supposed to be the contrasting constant, when people (women) who are naturally more volatile in terms of mood try to set the terms or have the leverage, the man lives and dies with her wants. When a man who has genuine interest in the woman + a potential family set terms they live and by trying to find what best to achieve/sustain their relationship/family. That's fundamentally why I always say the girls gotta like the guy a little more for the most stability/optimal outcome

 

[Scustin Bieburr]

Men can love any woman. It doesn't matter if she's short, it doesn't matter if she's overweight, it doesn't matter if she's broke, it doesn't matter if she's unemployed, it doesn't matter if she's as dumb as a sack of rocks. There will be a man who will love that woman completely unconditionally. This is what men are taught, we have the message of 'outer beauty is not that important, love someone for who they are not for what they look like or what you think they can do for you' the men who wholeheartedly believe that message are the ones who end up becoming simps. They're willing to take a woman in warts and all.

Women are rarely like that with us. There are countless reasons I've seen give for curving an otherwise good guy.

• He's too short. He needs to be much taller than I am.
• he makes less money than me. He needs to make more
• he's bald
• He's too handsome
• he's too sexual
• he's not sexual enough
• He spends too much time with his friends and doesn't invite me, but when he does it feels awkward when I'm around them. That's somehow his fault.
• he's boring
• he's too spontaneous
• he's too serious
• he plays too much
• Other women flirt with him whenever we're out
• he's too smart
• he's too dumb
• he's fat and it's embarrassing to be seen with him
• he's too fit and it's embarrassing to be seen with him
• he chews too loudly
• he's too kind and it makes her feel uncomfortable
• he's too busy with his job even though he told you he has a busy job when you met him.
• You had a dream he cheated on you and now you can't trust him
• he reminds you too much of your ex but you can't say in which way

Anyone who posts in this thread knows someone or has experienced rejection for one of these reasons. The only people who actually bought into that 'what matters is the person' narrative are the ones who suffer from the harsh reality all the more. What we're seeing now though is those men who would just have to settle for these women regardless of whatever baggage they have are now starting to ask "why? if I wasn't good enough back then, why am I suddenly good enough now?" It's a salient question that I've seen internet feminists just euro-step entirely, same with the questions of "what's wrong with a father wanting to know that his child is his?" and "what is wrong with men trying to protect themselves from a potential false allegation?" or "what's wrong with men exercising their right to leave a relationship if they don't agree with his partner's past choices and overall decision making?"

 

[Ezekiel 25:17]

Dudes give off those stability vibes, they let hoes walk on them

 

[Streetcar]

At this point in life I don't care to have a woman if I gotta do all this extra, frankly if I can't get real support from the woman (not wiping my tears), but noticing when a breh is mentally fatigued or allow me to occasionally get my shyt off about all the things we balance/manage as brehs/humans, outside of the time we're together.

If I gotta hide my struggles from the woman and put on a facade after I already bagged/claimed her she's essentially useless outside of child rearing and I'm not pressed for children.

I've watched my mom be able to read when my dad is mentally preoccupied and give him space, we lived in a 1 bedroom growing up and I'd hear them talking from the living room late at night/early morning about life, planning, regrets.

Make no mistake, there's hierarchy, but my mother has say, and complete dominion on certain things. It's like a President/VP power dynamic. I realize most modern women, and most women in my age group legitimately aren't reared for to be this type of woman anymore. My mom makes no pumpfakes on what she can and can't do. Everything she can do for self she does, and she maintains the home. Car issues ---> Dad, Bill Management ---> Dad, Financial Planning ---> Dad, and there's no friction because the roles are set.

Society moving away from defined gender roles in relationship has had and will continue to have long term ramifications, because a lot of people particularly women pumpfake on what they want to manage/be responsible for in a relationship as well as what they want. The "wants" is important as women's emotions are fleeting and men are supposed to be the contrasting constant, when people (women) who are naturally more volatile in terms of mood try to set the terms or have the leverage, the man lives and dies with her wants. When a man who has genuine interest in the woman + a potential family set terms they live and by trying to find what best to achieve/sustain their relationship/family. That's fundamentally why I always say the girls gotta like the guy a little more for the most stability/optimal outcome

I hear you and I did say don’t be an emotionless robot. I see the dynamic of your family and that’s definitely ideal. Modern times things are extremely different man. I’d assume given your intelligence/ upbringing you’ve done well and will probably want a good looking woman. If she’s from the West and attractive then a lot of what I say applies at least initially. Not all of these women btw I don’t want to generalize but social media has had an immense impact on my generation.

I agree absolutely about she loving more. I believe if you know your intentions/morals are straight and you won’t fukk shyt up you must lead the relationship and it’s very important she respects you. In our parents time a woman would understand her husband being stressed etc but things are different. Don’t get me wrong there are many women who WILL understand and some who will want to and try but as I said times are different. It’s not even just women, not by a long shot they’re just the main point to this particular conversation as a man but the truth is people are nowadays are constantly looking for better even if their judgement is a little clouded in that moment.


I encourage brehs to get everything in order. Finances, fitness, spirituality, team etc. Be the best version of you and you by virtue of being able to walk away you maximize the chances of finding the best lady for you.

 

[RareHunter]

This is why I have age limits on seriously dating. If a woman wouldn't fukk you when she was 18-25 and she had met you then, or you know you couldn't catch her eye without bread, there's not a basal/primal attraction. If she doesn't lust for you there's a certain amount of leverage you'll never have in the relationship.

Also women rarely love men, they love men for what they perceive them to be, what the man can do for them, and how the man can make them feel. Not necessarily the man in his natural genuine state idiosyncrasies and all.

All of that (including lust) goes both ways, and men (as one myself ) rarely love women without the same types of contingencies, just different criteria.

love is brought through providing a certain comfort that one doesn’t want to lose. For women it may be financial or physical security, for men it may be sexual satisfaction and a sense of responsibility. Love is formed through finding someone who fulfills your selfish desires. That’s not gender based.

I feel love is a choice. Marriage was never about love. Marrying for love is a new age feminine concept and fickle and in this climate it’s much worse. How u could u ever truly love a woman in this age when there’s so many and 99% are hoes looking for a placeholder/stepfather? How could they love a man when there’s always a taller, richer, better looking guy around the corner?

Let’s not forget most people are raised in dysfunction. Honestly romantic love doesn’t work at all, especially when u remove courtship and remove the father from selecting the mate for the woman. Also without both desiring to love God and do right by each other for that reason, it’s really pointless to marry. To even get married these days is just like spinning a wheel of fortune.

The reason marriage ain’t even happening no more is because use be women thought they can catch dudes by waiting 90 days regardless of past, but now most dudes know that women are always playing a chastity/celibate role depending on who the guy is and her goals.

 

[Action Mike]

This is why I have age limits on seriously dating. If a woman wouldn't fukk you when she was 18-25 and she had met you then, or you know you couldn't catch her eye without bread, there's not a basal/primal attraction. If she doesn't lust for you there's a certain amount of leverage you'll never have in the relationship.

Also women rarely love men, they love men for what they perceive them to be, what the man can do for them, and how the man can make them feel. Not necessarily the man in his natural genuine state idiosyncrasies and all.

free game

 

[Bossino]

I feel love is a choice. Marriage was never about love. Marrying for love is a new age feminine concept and fickle and in this climate it’s much worse. How u could u ever truly love a woman in this age when there’s so many and 99% are hoes looking for a placeholder/stepfather? How could they love a man when there’s always a taller, richer, better looking guy around the corner?

Let’s not forget most people are raised in dysfunction. Honestly romantic love doesn’t work at all, especially when u remove courtship and remove the father from selecting the mate for the woman. Also without both desiring to love God and do right by each other for that reason, it’s really pointless to marry. To even get married these days is just like spinning a wheel of fortune.

The reason marriage ain’t even happening no more is because use be women thought they can catch dudes by waiting 90 days regardless of past, but now most dudes know that women are always playing a chastity/celebrate role depending on who the guy is and her goals.

This plus divorce law sumns it up more or less.

I'm already moving through past the poorest/most unpleasant/stuggle/adverse stages of my life (early 20s learning, becoming an actual adult with the correspondent self sufficiency and responsibilities), once I'm done with that transition I don't really care to find anyone. The way my mind works, coupled with my outlook in general I don't believe I'd be able to trust a woman or open up enough to date and believe she likes me for me for me, because most women don't like men like that in general as previously discussed ITT. Moreover people don't work through things anymore, when they going gets tough, they get gone. To compound the loss divorce courts will allow her to walk away with some of your shyt, or get residual payments.

I'm very comfortable alone, though I now see why men date younger women and why some men groom. There's scarcity in women worthy of bearing children, cross reference that with women you actually get along, are compatible with, filter that for black women, and it ain't hard to tell many don't get the happy ending

Just some ramblings

 

[Peak]

You a car theif!

Mufukka can you buy that?

 

[Goat poster]

It’s always interesting to see whether people like what they attract. Because that’s what it comes down to.

There are more than just users attracted to you usually. There are plenty of decent people who may find you desirable. But the question is, do you want those individuals that act right and are interested in you.

Who you choose to entertain, worry about, pursue, woo, spend time with is a reflection of what you really want.

People have a hard time understanding that everything that glitters ain’t gold or marriage material. But once they learn to strike a balance between the physical attraction and other relationship oriented qualities that can sustain something real over time, then a lot of this stuff melts away. But that comes with personal growth, self-knowledge, attending to personal needs and such.

TRUTH

many folks simply don’t want who wants them and end up chasing all the wrong things

 

[Hacksaw Jim Thuggin]

This is why I have age limits on seriously dating. If a woman wouldn't fukk you when she was 18-25 and she had met you then, or you know you couldn't catch her eye without bread, there's not a basal/primal attraction. If she doesn't lust for you there's a certain amount of leverage you'll never have in the relationship.

Also women rarely love men, they love men for what they perceive them to be, what the man can do for them, and how the man can make them feel. Not necessarily the man in his natural genuine state idiosyncrasies and all.

i would definitely agree with this but with one caveat ....women love emotionally which to me isnt real love...because it is ALL based on feelings which change by the minute with women....love is a choice. love is a verb. its action. the only true love is love this way....how men do it

 

[Hacksaw Jim Thuggin]

I get what you mean in a literal sense but for me again OBVIOUSLY I would want her to feel the same way about the relationship. Ideally we both be getting the same perceived long term benefit.

In reality there is a "winner" in most relationships or a person who feels more happy/content. I personally think relationships work better when the woman loves the man more because it allows for fluctuations without the commitments shaking. From what I've seen when it's even all it takes is her losing a few pounds, buddy losing his job, a lurking work bf, etc. to tip the scales. I don't want to say women are more fickle in relationships but I've always perceived it that way if the man and the woman are entering the relationship based off love/attraction/enjoyment of company vs. a guy looking for consistent sex with a woman that isn't too bothersome, or a guy that wants someone to cook and clean for him, etc.

consistent sex is never a reason to get into a relationship....because the man will always end up feeling shorted sexually.....

on demand sex that happens at the beginning dries up....and thats usually from the woman...because whatever she FEELING (always emotion with women) wont be the same months/years down the line.....shyt never fails...then youre having conversations about why you dont have sex anymore....eventhough to you everything is the same....and it is...its just her perception of you has changed

 

[Hacksaw Jim Thuggin]

1000% you're correct, men have always love harder because that's meant literal work/providing/sacrifice as a minimum, in addition to validation and affection. To really make the cypher complete you'd ideally be able to be vulnerable with the woman but that's the catch-22. Woman don't like that shyt. They want to confide, cry to, be supported emotionally by, have tears and fears calmed by YOU, the man. Once you show chinks in your armor the dynamics often change and now she has the ammo she needs to shatter the mans heart and subsequently his mental. I know I have one actual love left in me, after that not a chance I'm as vulnerable, shyt I've had mild heartbreak and it makes you more precautious and hesitant to trust/open up. When I meet women I tell them tongue in cheek I'm boring and emotionally unavailable and that's the case for most women I'll come across because we won't have similar intellects/interests/taste, and I'm able to ID their surface level reason for interest because as aforementioned it's not me as a whole, it's my car, my physique, my humor.

People grossly understate how understanding people and having the ability to relate/connect to different people/be personable doesn't translate to you finding someone you have a genuine connection with, that goes for women, acquaintances, and associates

stop loving with your heart breh and love with your mind. that will put it all in the proper perspective.