Yeah man I've done all that. I'm officially frustrated because I think he's being extremely selfish atm. We fell out because of his eccentricities, his insecurities, and lies he told...in response to those things I said some REALLY fukkED UP shyt. I would never regularly disrespect my love. It was a bad arguement over his jealousy and continually accusing me of cheating. But it was all out of anger and I apologized. Unfortunately he refuses to let the words I spewed go. Which is unfair because I forgave him for the royally fukkED shyt he's done to me.
We've argued about it, cried about it, and talked about it in depth. But he won't budge. Usually it would be nothing for me to let a dude go and move on, but after the fallout I realized how essential he is to my heart/life.
None of the talking worked, so I thought the spoiling would be a nice surprise since he ALWAYS did special things for me. No bueno....
I am not the best with advice. . But I can share a slice of my history and you can see the perspective from a man's point of view.
My last serious gf about two years ago. . ( Body was
) Kinda the same scenario. . She was you. We dated for two years and in those two years I did it all. Rented us a house. . . then a month after us being together she had a falling out at her job. . I told her quit.
She had been wanting to make and sell crafts. . Handmade jewelry etc. I told her you focus on that and I will hold us down. So she did not work for two years basically. I also footed the bill for all the stuff she needed to get started. Ordered hella shyt from china.
And we were good. . For a while. Your line about " We fell out because of his eccentricities, his insecurities, and lies " Is kinda what happened to us. I unwittingly was carrying baggage. . Which caused me to not really be open. . . . I am trying to explain . Let me reset.
This is how it would go. She would want to know everything about me. I would hit her with the
. . I am a great listener. But she had to pull teeth to get me to open up. It was not like I did not love her. I did. But I figured why the fuss??!!!! I am providing for you and your hobby. I did not truly get why she was mad. Arguments started. I do not mean to stereotype. . But black women when they want to can say the meanest things that can cut a nikka to the bone.
I am just not built that way for verbal warfare. So I would get more quiet. Which caused her to go
We broke up. . And she found someone right away who was willing to feed her emotionally more than I was.
When I say a brotha was devastated. . .
I remember looking on FB and seeing her hugged up with some dude like two weeks after we broke up. . I sat in my car and cried like a bytch. Then called my moms and cried on the phone. Cause it was kinda hitting me that I truly fukked up.... It was like I could see why after my marriages my relationships were failing. . I had always assumed it was the chicks fault. But I was not emotionally available. . Eventually if a chick loves you she wants that.
I remember I called her one day determined to get her back. I broke down and told her exactly what was on my heart. How I own my problems. . And that I want her back. . She hit me with the
and kept it moving. . I wallowed in that L for a whole weekend. . Then on Monday I closed that chapter in my heart, hit the gym hardcore and moved the fukk on.
She started having some real problems with her new dude. He was not what he seemed and she figured out quickly that the grass was not always greener. .She started doing what you did. . Hitting me up out the blue with gifts. Offering free p*ssy. Calling and checking up on me. By this time I still loved her. .but I was also free. Once the relationship bond was broken It could not be repaired back to it's original form. And the more she tried to get me back the more I
. . Until eventually I kinda phased her out of my life completely. I STILL think about her. But. . It was a chapter that ended sadly.
my fear come to life.
You don't want to go that route sis. It may hurt know, but it's better to learn from this and get better. Don't do yourself like that. Because once you do, you'll belong to the game.
