Brehette is upset because breh took her to feed the homeless on the first date. Is she wrong?

[Space Cowboy]

I had to come back because seriously why would anyone want to be standing on their feet for hours, moving & lifting things, coordinating things, hearing people's how they became homeless stories, how they are at the end of their rope stories on a date?

This lets me know some people have never actually volunteered before. It can be an all day thing where you're contributing and actually being of service. You can't do what you actually came to do if you're trying to duck off and get to know someone new. After we've established we actually like each other, yes let's go feed the homeless

I've volunteered multiple times and it's not really back breaking at all. Oh no, I'm standing for 30 minutes making a plate for somebody. I'm so tired wahhhh

 

[Luke Cage]

I had to come back because seriously why would anyone want to be standing on their feet for hours, moving & lifting things, coordinating things, hearing people's how they became homeless stories, how they are at the end of their rope stories on a date?

This lets me know some people have never actually volunteered before. It can be an all day thing where you're contributing and actually being of service. You can't do what you actually came to do if you're trying to duck off and get to know someone new. After we've established we actually like each other, yes let's go feed the homeless

I've never volunteered a day in my life. But i did honestly assume that some people must enjoy doing it.

 

[Still Benefited]

Thats like telling somebody "I work at the Amazon warehouse".


So she invites you to the crib on the first date "Thought you might wanna help me move.Grab that box for me"

 

[Rekkapryde]

Bro, I’ve fed the homeless and there is a lot of time to talk with the other volunteers. Secondly, it’s a 2 hour commitment for most places, y’all can grab lunch together after. A date is about getting to know someone, not stunt. Ain’t nothing romantic about sitting across from each other at some fake bourgie 3 zig zag sauce clubstrauant with the fake plant wall, that’s just wanting to stunt.


Some of these women literally be missing out on decent men because of stupid constructs they have in their head. And if only 1-2 things qualifies as a good first date, be a whole 30 year old and share that ahead of time

 

[malbaker86]

She’s right. Dude outta pocket for that

 

[Regular Developer]

Sorry, I don't see it. I mean, I'm also not someone who volunteers regularly, so that could just be me not feeling it as a date idea in general. But I'd prefer to deal with less people on a first date.

Edit: There seems to be a balance on people for and against this. a poll woulda been a good addition to this thread.

 

[Coco Loco]

I've volunteered multiple times and it's not really back breaking at all. Oh no, I'm standing for 30 minutes making a plate for somebody. I'm so tired wahhhh

Which is why I specifically said it can be an all day thing not it is an all day thing

I've never volunteered a day in my life. But i did honestly assume that some people must enjoy doing it.

I do because I know a few wrong moves and I can be those people. Their stories usually have one incident that kicks everything off. This is why I always give people grace and treat people with respect

 

[Dwayne_Taylor]

Some of these young women think the whole purpose of a date is to uplift and validate their ego.

An act of service toward another person, such as volunteer work, is a direct contradiction to that.

That's the real reason she's mad.

 

[MajesticLion]

Ok, I know that isn't real, but it happens.

Just so you know...you've described exactly what is happening.

The image, the symbolism of a "life" is what's in demand. Keep in mind, steady diets of Sex & the City/Real Housewives/social media expectations here. "Entertainment" is the reality they've chosen to accept. Then all that runs headlong into real life. People are not only confused, they're rejecting the reality of what their senses are telling them, because everything they've been told is contrary to that. So the reject the reality and go back where it's "safe", i.e. inside their heads where the fantasy loop can continue.

An actual situation where you get to see first hand the empathy a person has, feeding other people, and posters are mentally withdrawing into themselves because the idea alone makes them feel vulnerable and exposed.




Up is down, and down is up.

No matter the tech, no matter the platform, things will always boil back down to the basics: people dealing with people directly. No shortcuts, no substitutes, no middlemen, no data mining, no ads, no excuses.

 

[HiphopRelated]

Just so you know...you've described exactly what is happening.

The image, the symbolism of a "life" is what's in demand. Keep in mind, steady diets of Sex & the City/Real Housewives/social media expectations here. "Entertainment" is the reality they've chosen to accept. Then all that runs headlong into real life. People are not only confused, they're rejecting the reality of what their senses are telling them, because everything they've been told is contrary to that. So the reject the reality and go back where it's "safe", i.e. inside their heads where the fantasy loop can continue.

An actual situation where you get to see first hand the empathy a person has, feeding other people, and posters are mentally withdrawing into themselves because the idea alone makes them feel vulnerable and exposed.




Up is down, and down is up.

You can judge that from how she treats a bartender or the barista too. If this was one of those "expensive dates" threads, fukk her, but this just seems like the Tinder generation not knowing how to actually talk to people so lets fill in all the space of me not having shyt to say by hearing some hard luck stories.

 

[The ADD]

People still go on dates

 

[Hawala Man]

She never really was the volunteer type and was pump faking it he tested her and saw 2 major character flaws. First one is she was a potential liar or exaggerating what constitutes as "volunteer work" and the second being she ran to social media to get validation from a bunch of strangers for her fragile ego. If she really felt that way as a grown woman she should've addressed it to him directly but nah we living in the clout chasing "I want to viral for likes/ attention" era.

Women who volunteer wouldn't have a problem with this as usually there are other activities included with this type of outing if communicated in advance.

 

[CreepyMcCreeperson]

Damn this man for listening, trying to engage in your so called volunteer interest, and get to know you. Yes, he’s clearly the loser here

He was trying to manipulate her by making her think he actually wanted to feed the homeless, and was trying to avoid paying for a date.

No man is investing money in a woman he doesn’t take seriously unless he’s balling. This is why we tell brehs that every woman doesn’t get the expensive dinner date. The first date doesn’t even have to be an expensive place, but attraction isn’t built in homeless shelter. Women like dressing up, and feeling feminine. And personally, I’d rather see that, than look at her in a damn HAIRNET. That’s worse than a bonnet! That’s an activity you do once you’re in a relationship, and you start incorporating each other into your regular routine.

What makes her a bird is running to social media to post about it. She is making herself appear as an undesirable woman. If I saw a woman posting about men on social media, I’d not be interested. I don’t care for women who need to tell the world all the details of their lives. She’s the type you’d date, get into a fight, and she’s posting those quotes, and memes, and all your social circle knows it’s about you.

 

[CreepyMcCreeperson]

Go on a first date like this brehs

I’m sure she’ll feel feminine and sexy looking like this. I’m sure you’ll love having this image in your head all week brehs

 

[XannyWarbucks]

She never really was the volunteer type and was pump faking it he tested her and saw 2 major character flaws. First one is she was a potential liar or exaggerating what constitutes as "volunteer work" and the second being she ran to social media to get validation from a bunch of strangers for her fragile ego. If she really felt that way as a grown woman she should've addressed it to him directly but nah we living in the clout chasing "I want to viral for likes/ attention" era.

Women who volunteer wouldn't have a problem with this as usually there are other activities included with this type of outing if communicated in advance.

Eh, it comes off more that people in this generation have no idea how to communicate.

I agree with her that it's a bad fukking idea for a FIRST DATE, but it also shows how fukking weak people are at communicating what they actually seek out of a relationship. He clearly took enough effort to listen to something she does, but executed poorly. The shelter isn't a place where you're going to sit and meet someone. It doesn't mean she lied about volunteering. I think most people would've said "No" to that.

I do agree with your point that she should've addressed him. She should've just reached out and said, "No" and explained to him why this is a stupid idea. How the fukk is homie supposed to learn anything from this? Especially when she's airing it on Social Media. She didn't expose him, but he fukking knows its him.