At what point should a wife leave her husband after he has put his hands on her?

[CinnaSlim]

Drugs + Pushing + Adultery = Divorce

No doubt about it.

 

[KinksandCoils]

If he will push he will hit. She should leave if she feels like her life is in danger. Abusive men tend to be cheaters as well.

 

[Abayo]

You leave after the first time but its ok if you wait a few days to calm down and plan your revenge before you leave

 

[Malt-O-Meal]

Leave immediately. They is no such thing as hitting just once. If they'll hit you once, it will happen again. Abusers don't just start beating you up immediately, it starts gradually. They hit you once and then it's ok sorry, then it happens again and it's "see what you made me do" or "why did you provoke me to". It eventually leads to getting beat continuously. Get out at the first sign of abuse and that sign is the first hit/physical confrontation. The longer you stay the harder it is too leave, physical abuse comes packaged with emotional abuse.

 

[EARFQUAKE]

damn you sexy

 

[GoGetMyDamnBelt_]

In theory i'd like to believe this is the case. But I know a double standard exist here and I don't really have a problem with it.

Any man calling for a divorce because he wife got really upset once and pushed or slapped him isn't going to be looked at as any kind of real man or husband if he running trying to get a divorce over it.


I could never see myself being like yeah that's a wrap we are done you "pushed me"




Theoretically I'd like to think she'd never get ballsy enough or so upset that it came to that with her, but you never know



I know I wouldn't be thinking divorce or anything off a push or a slap.


I'd be highly pissed off with a slap tho, just swing on me

Been with my husband going on 4 years and it hasn't always been the greatest but we never crossed the domestic violence barrier. About 3 months ago, I found out he cheated. I was filled with so much rage that I swung at him. He ate every punch, slap and hair pulling I gave him. That happened about 2 more times since discovering his infedility. Shortly after, I told him I was cheating. He choked me, did a lot of restraining and manhandling. Once the situation calmed itself, we talked deeply on it and said that's not something that's ever gonna happen again. Neither him or I ever been in a relationship prior that took a turn to physical fighting. Divorce was definitely in question but it was due to the situation, not at the hitting. As you've said & I agree, it depends on the situation. If I don't feel my life is threatened or it will be a repeated occurrence, I won't leave. People usually go off on emotion, im not gonna do something permanent (leaving) based on a temporary emotion.

 

[Seea]

There's no coming back from that for me. He wouldn't get any more opportunities to lose his mind while we in the same house. It would be better he leave quietly, because I don't put hands on people to just hurt them. I feel threatened and the only thing I'm thinking about is making sure you don't have the audacity to ever again.

 

[Lewis Black]

Honestly, after the 15th time it really made our relationship stronger

 

[Krazy K]

You're thinking of what, women who are calling their abusive partners names or hit them to provoke them to hit them back? Abusive relationships usually don't operate like that. In those cases both partners are abusive. That's different situation from a man or woman beating on a nonviolent partner.

Victims of abuse usually say they have to walk on eggshells meaning anything they do from saying the wrong word to overcooking dinner to having normal human emotions will set their volatile partner off. it's not someone else's responsibility to prevent you from losing your shyt. Unless this person is beating on you, physical abuse cannot be provoked. Physical abuse is a choice. People who physically abuse their partners usually have a mental disorder, like borderline, antisocial or narcissistic personality or bipolar disorder.

This

 

[tater]

I read that thread and just decided not to comment. In all honesty, I don't think she should divorce him. If it's out of character and he was on drugs there are clearly other issues at hand. I may not stay in the house until he figures Those out, but a divorce for a push is excessive IMO.

I also think it depends on the relationship. None of us can make that call IMO.

 

[An ashy lil fap hand]

I tapped my girl in the jaw once. She used to think slapping and punching was cool. She socked me in the face 3 times while I was sleep because I left some food out or something. I told her if she tries it again, it will be reciprocated. shyt never happened again and we got new Tupperware.

 

[Chill]

Immediately. The tone/course of the relationship is changed forever from that point on.

 

[Yo Mama]

I say that first time.

I know of women who have tried to stick it out but it never changes. usually stops when the hubby is too old or sick to beat her.
Then those who have gone to church counseling... to try get him help.

But I have never personally seen a case where there was positive change. Sometimes its better to just walk away from an abusive spouse.

 

[Rawtid]

The first time.

 

[GoldCoastSaint]

Immediately. No exceptions.