Any of y’all cut of toxic religious parents before?
- Thread starter JA_Carter
- Start date
Mike Nasty
Superstar
No.
Absolutely not, I'm an atheist with very religious parents, just limit your time with them, if you have kids make sure they aren't indoctrinated by their grandparents, don't let them bully you with their nonsense. But never cut them off completely unless they are abusive.
SupaDupaFresh
Superstar
Yup but this person had far bigger issues than being an abusive Bible thumping narcissist. The fact he hides all his cruelty and worst wrongdoings behind vague convictions of God, and accuses anyone who speaks out against his behavior as being "possessed by the devil" is just the tip of the iceberg for how much of a toxic unbearable moron he is.
I don't identify as an atheist. I'm not ultra religious but I would tell you I believe in God. However I was raised around tons of hypocrites. Committed every sin in the book short of murder and can't be convinced they are anything less than righteous all-knowing mystics. Im almost traumatized by church, church families, and church communities from my upbringing. I have to know aim in the company if true spiritual academics and advisors. I just have a hard time trusting people who shout from the rooftops how much they love and follow Jesus.
I don't identify as an atheist. I'm not ultra religious but I would tell you I believe in God. However I was raised around tons of hypocrites. Committed every sin in the book short of murder and can't be convinced they are anything less than righteous all-knowing mystics. Im almost traumatized by church, church families, and church communities from my upbringing. I have to know aim in the company if true spiritual academics and advisors. I just have a hard time trusting people who shout from the rooftops how much they love and follow Jesus.
Religious people are just people at the end of the day. And people can be shytty, hypocritical, toxic, selfish, and so on.
I was a bit glib earlier on but I'll be blunt. If your mother is a detriment to your mental health then you need to put healthy space between yourself and her until she figures out her issues. And that would apply whether she is religious or atheist. You can be a c*nt either way.
I was a bit glib earlier on but I'll be blunt. If your mother is a detriment to your mental health then you need to put healthy space between yourself and her until she figures out her issues. And that would apply whether she is religious or atheist. You can be a c*nt either way.
This is my issue with some ultra-Christians —the hypocrisy.
Gossiping women, dirty men cheating with anyone who will allow or attacking women, pedos molesting kids, admin stealing money from the church, etc.
My family is VERY religious, but they’re true. We were in such a bubble we were naive to how ppl REALLY operate, which was my main issue with my overly religious family. Train up your children how you want; but keep it real about how the world really is because all you’re doing is sending your child into the world as a mark.
My mom, however, is more of a religious narc. She’s all about religion now that she’s older (and yes she did raise and protect me, etc), but she was definitely a mean girl and had that energy when I was younger.
Classic story of realizing she’s becoming an old lady and now suddenly she’s soft spoken and never raises her voice when four years ago she’d say some slick shyt and make you cry.
Nah.
She has obvious mental issues, but that’s my mom so despite my frustration I’m not cutting her off. I just feed her with a long-handled spoon.
But if you’re dealing with truly toxic ppl, religious or not- yea you need to cut your losses and run. It’s the mental abuse that YOU are dealing with that other people can’t see. No one knows how those toxic relatives make you feel and how they can cripple you mentally and emotionally.
Imagine the mental damage done to a child living in a situation like that!
Personally no, cause I don’t believe in cutting off close relatives like that over petty shyt.
But in your case it may not be “petty shyt” so I don’t know.
But in your case it may not be “petty shyt” so I don’t know.
Because good people, and people who are true to their religion don’t have to shout it from the rooftop. It’s evident in how they interact with people, how they conduct themselves, etc. You see it in them.
If you have to tell me you’re a Believer, I don’t believe you lol
And that is actually supported by the Bible (at least from a Christian perspective). Jesus hated the fukk out of the Pharisees because they were hypocrites who made loud declarations of their faith but had evil hearts.
It's so sad that hypocritical Christians don't get the irony.
What exactly makes your parents toxic OP? Can you elaborate for us please fam?
Can’t speak to my mother without her bringing up God, ALWAYS judging my life, watches these African Pentecostal churches 24/7 and all they talk about is devils and hell so ANYTHING I do she has to be negative about. For example, if I’m going to a party, instead of wishing me to enjoy myself she’ll say ‘I had a dream something bad happened, you shouldn’t go. That’s God speaking to me’.
Doesn’t approve of my relationship even though she hasn’t met my girlfriend, just says her ‘spirit’ doesn’t feel her. Wants me to bring her to her pastor as she believes God speaks through her pastor, which I refuse to do.
Typical hypocritical Christian, condemns me for fornicating even though she did the same. Oh but it’s different because she asked for forgiveness.
I could go on, she relies on me financially but I just can’t stand how negative she is because of religion. It’s starting to affect my mental health and how I view her.
SupaDupaFresh
Superstar
Unfortunately some people use "God" to hide behind their own pain, insecurties, and unwillingness to put in that real work to really engage with the world.
Talking is hard. "GOD says so" is easy.
Being a real, expressive human being with flaws of your own is hard. Being a perfect "Christian" who doesn't have to explain anything is easy.
I say this as someone who lived this experience, and still does. It's tragic.
I imagine if you cut off your mother she will be thinking that the devil got to you and that's going to worry and concern her more especially if something actually does happen to you while you're away. Momma can play it off like "See I told you". From what you said she seems genuinely concerned.
Damn, I'm sorry to hear that. Have you told her this? I would say communicate first before directly cutting her off. But you cutting your moms off will probably solidify those beliefs she has about you. Especially as a bible believer, it's verses in the gospel about families being divided (Luke 12:49-53). But I can see how as a young man not being able to get your swerve on and enjoy life and having to look after someone can be upsetting and troubling. That's my two cents but I'm not a counselor or anything.
