Why Men Get So Few Matches on Dating Apps

[Ahadi]

Of course there's truth to it - it's why I shared it - even if the example isn't necessarily catering to men's sensibilities. The current dating landscape is heavily skewed by the illusion of infinite choice - and that's because of the way people socialize now. Dating expectations are at odds with most people's realities.

Growing up - bad bytches in your neighborhood were bad bytches in your neighborhood - at most/best, they would have been known in the club scene in your city. Whereas now, an attractive woman can accumulate a national - sometimes international - following simply by posting pictures in tight fitting/gym clothes on IG/twitter.

As you said, there are no "barriers". You have random women expecting to be courted by and/or in the same manner the top percentile of earners would court their girlfriends, and you have random men pining after the most attractive women that live on the other side of the globe.

Yup.

There use to be a class system. Now everyone can somewhat hop into the next “class”

 

[Braman]

I’ve been using this term for over 20 years: ‘build your funnel’

It’s a sales term meaning you need to approach/engage as many customers as possible to create favorable odds. Dating is identical to sales. You need to engage/approach/match/talk to as many women as possible to create a break thru(s).

Well you cannot ASK for a better and more efficient way to do that than online dating. So if you are having problems with OLD, it’s you.

My guess at the most common issues:

1- Catering to a hood aesthetic- the hood has a stranglehold on the black community and a lot of nggas still dress/act/talk like little ass boys. In person you can get away with it. Online you’re gonna be rejected for it

2- Being conditioned by gender wars and social media- yall actually believing in that bullshyt they shovel. In actuality, men are made to dominate and lead. A lot of you carry yourself like these women are more complex/strong/demanding than they really are.

3- Wrong app/not using it right/wrong area. You need unlimited attempts at the women you want. They’re everywhere. If you not gettin that, either you live in the wrong area or the app is holding you back with limited swipes

 

[O.T.I.S.]

I get a lot of matches.. I just do not respond


Convos go nowhere, I usually get asked for more pics, weird ass attitudes (like you and your 5 kids are supposed to be impressive), want you to jump through hoops, I’m not on my phone all day so they get mad at late responses, etc.

I tried a few times out here.. but once I had to drive out of my way just to be disappointed ONCE.. I was done. I just stopped trying with women over here.

 

[Shadow King]

Dating for men is a numbers game.

Write a nice message, copy & paste the message to 50 women, 10 women might respond then lead to dates with 3-4 women.

Men who approach the most women get the most ass.

Dress better, workout, nice haircut, facial hair etc to improve your chances

True, but why do you think so many men fight against this, especially the ones that claim to have little to no success with women?

Ego & lazyness. Average men want to be treated like the 10% men. Average men feel why should I put in the effort when a 10% men smash women, with little to no effort.

Truth is average men will have to put in alot of extra effort just to get one woman.

Just pure laziness tbh
Porn addiction dopamine got them lazy

Lol

 

[Shadow King]

Are they really “settling” for long term relationships with single moms and overweight women? That seems like a reach in terms of not wanting those things at all and ending up with them.

Why do you hyperfocus on long-term relationships in this topic when there are steps before that which men are gatekept from achieving?

 

[The ADD]

Why do you hyperfocus on long-term relationships in this topic when there are steps before that which men are gatekept from achieving?

Because in all these cases there should a distinction between casual sex and relationships.

If anyone is “settling” to casually sleep with single moms or overweight women that’s one conversation.

To settle into a relationship with them is a different conversation.

 

[Shadow King]

Because in all these cases there should a distinction between casual sex and relationships.

If anyone is “settling” to casually sleep with single moms or overweight women that’s one conversation.

To settle into a relationship with them is a different conversation.

Sleeping with people precedes serious relationships.

 

[The ADD]

Sleeping with people precedes serious relationships.

Context………

I find it hard to believe a large portion of men are “settling” to casually sleep with overweight women and then getting into a serious relationship.

And to be clear, I mean settling as in this is not ideal and I’m going strongly against my my preferences.

 

[Shadow King]

Context………

I find it hard to believe a large portion of men are “settling” to casually sleep with overweight women and then getting into a serious relationship.

Context is not something that I struggle with. Men are settling for the chance to try any of it. There is no stratification of the conversation.

 

[The ADD]

Context is not something that I struggle with. Men are settling for the chance to try any of it. There is no stratification of the conversation.

I don’t agree but we likely have different viewpoints on what settling means.

 

[Ozymandeas]

So you think women should date only based on a man’s career, despite not having chemistry? If one person likes to be out socially, and one likes to stay in, would they be compatible just because he has a good job? Who has to change their lifestyle? Or would it be better to date someone with the same interests?

He didn't say all of that bro. You adding all that extra stuff in.

He said she would "entertain him as an option" meaning she would see if they had chemistry, if they fit together as partners, etc.

 

[Shadow King]

I don’t agree but we likely have different viewpoints on what settling means.

We don't agree because your fixation on trying to stratify men's intentions is a roundabout form of "shuddup and play the game".

 

[The ADD]

We don't agree because your fixation on trying to stratify men's intentions is a roundabout form of "shuddup and play the game".

Sounds good

 

[Ozymandeas]

Hinge is undisputably the best dating app I've ever used. You will really find a girlfriend on there. Best selection of beautiful, down-to-earth women I've ever seen from any dating app.

One of the biggest advantages Hinge has is that women can put their preferences for free. I'm a 5'11" black man. On other dating apps, there might be a lot of girls but not all of them trying to date a black guy, or a guy under 6 feet. On Hinge, you can at least see who fukks with you.

BLK had too many hoodrats, escorts trying to catch dates, ponks listing themselves as women & white/Latina girls looking for black dikk.

Tinder has way too many bots & you will likely run into the race issue that Hinge doesn't have.

Thats my experience as well.

 

[Shadow King]

Sounds good

I know it does.