White People Using Ebonics Ironically Unappreciation Thread

[Turbulent]

Y'all should try not being so butthurt and have fun with it. I often retort all that ironic nonsense by saying sh!t that white people used to say in the 1950's. Examples include:

"That's SWELL!"
"Well all righty then!"
"Aww shucks, fellas!"
"Aww fiddlesticks!"
"Howdillydoodily!"
"Is everything all HUNKY-DORY?"
"That's bang-on!"
"Yooooou BETCHA!"

I also say "dude" a lot. White people do not say "dude" like they used to so its quickly picked up on.

Basically, white people now use hood slang on a regular basis. It's not even ironic anymore. Being a black dude that can sound like Mitt Romney however is a VERY striking way of presenting yourself. It's fun as hell, you establish yourself as someone that's "in charge," and you maintain a level of self alienation from your white peers that's essential to Blackness in all contexts. If you really want to have fun shoot them subtle looks of disapproval whenever they casually swear in conversation. Watching them be all uncomfortable in the face of scrutiny is so fun. You have no idea.

this dude is an evil genius

 

[Ricky Church]

Yeah, I hate when white dudes I've never met in my life call me "Bro" For some reason that sh!t annoys me and I never respond.

that's just a white guy thing tho. they call everybody "bro"

 

[The Nigerian]

You must have a rare talent then. can't hate on that

It doesn't have to be rare. I covered this already:

http://www.the-coli.com/locker-room/18837-loser-mentality-amongst-blacks.html

"Fiddy Cent"

Yeah, that sh!t used to get me heated... like, to no end. For years I'd get the same *twinge* you get when you hear the N-Bomb being dropped. Just hearing that in any context could send me into a really negative space. I endured this for years. It was pretty infuriating, especially during that Vitamin Water deal the news would always introduce him as "Curtissss.... FIDDY CENT Jackson" while acting all shocked that a sales person from New York turned out to be a decent business man.

After years of suffering in silence I decided to get some answers. I think it was right around the time Curtis dropped and I overheard a white guy say it I asked him why he says 50 Cent like that. He looked at me, made a silly looking thinking face, then said "That's just how you say it. It's Fiddy!" Then it became very apparent to me that actually, that's just how white people say 50 Cent. But the question was still... why?

At first I thought that it was racism... but then I remembered that racism is just a condition of reality. Everything is racist depending on how you look at it. Even the sun is racist. So while that may be part of it, from my perspective it was easy to se that it definitely was not most of it. This dude wasn't even thinking about it on that level.

So this question weighed heavy on my mind for years after. I was at my apartment watching the TV and that weird SK commercial where 50 Cent is dealing steroids to Joan Rivers in the gym. This white girl that was just resting her head on my lap peaks her head up and blurts out "Ohmygaad, I have to try Fiddy's new energy shaaaaat!" And I had an epiphany. White people genuinely think his name pronounced "Fiddy" Cent. They think that's cool to say. I knew it wasn't racism because that chick definitely wasn't racist. And if she was, she put up a good act.

In the end, I think it was really silly of me to give so much of a sh!t about such pettiness... but I think my story will help those that still get the twinge. It's not that serious brehs...

 

[atlbound]

This white girl that was just resting her head on my lap peaks her head up

just resting her head eh?

 

[Racked Up]

It doesn't have to be rare. I covered this already:

http://www.the-coli.com/locker-room/18837-loser-mentality-amongst-blacks.html



Yeah, that sh!t used to get me heated... like, to no end. For years I'd get the same *twinge* you get when you hear the N-Bomb being dropped. Just hearing that in any context could send me into a really negative space. I endured this for years. It was pretty infuriating, especially during that Vitamin Water deal the news would always introduce him as "Curtissss.... FIDDY CENT Jackson" while acting all shocked that a sales person from New York turned out to be a decent business man.

After years of suffering in silence I decided to get some answers. I think it was right around the time Curtis dropped and I overheard a white guy say it I asked him why he says 50 Cent like that. He looked at me, made a silly looking thinking face, then said "That's just how you say it. It's Fiddy!" Then it became very apparent to me that actually, that's just how white people say 50 Cent. But the question was still... why?

At first I thought that it was racism... but then I remembered that racism is just a condition of reality. Everything is racist depending on how you look at it. Even the sun is racist. So while that may be part of it, from my perspective it was easy to se that it definitely was not most of it. This dude wasn't even thinking about it on that level.

So this question weighed heavy on my mind for years after. I was at my apartment watching the TV and that weird SK commercial where 50 Cent is dealing steroids to Joan Rivers in the gym. This white girl that was just resting her head on my lap peaks her head up and blurts out "Ohmygaad, I have to try Fiddy's new energy shaaaaat!" And I had an epiphany. White people genuinely think his name pronounced "Fiddy" Cent. They think that's cool to say. I knew it wasn't racism because that chick definitely wasn't racist. And if she was, she put up a good act.

In the end, I think it was really silly of me to give so much of a sh!t about such pettiness... but I think my story will help those that still get the twinge. It's not that serious brehs...

O naw im not mad breh most of this shyt has me on status

 

[jadillac]

Yeah cause we all know black people own english.
please.

Black ppl dont own English, but we're chastised for using ebonics...until slowly it creeps into everyday white language. Then it seems to be acceptable.

You can walk around now and hear white ppl using the word "diss", or "cool"(even this was a black word back in the 60s-70s), "my bad", etc. I hear it everyday on the street.

 

[The Nigerian]

Black ppl dont own English, but we're chastised for using ebonics...until slowly it creeps into everyday white language. Then it seems to be acceptable.

You can walk around now and hear white ppl using the word "diss", or "cool"(even this was a black word back in the 60s-70s), "my bad", etc. I hear it everyday on the street.

Cool (aesthetic) - Wikipedia

 

[Fredrick Thuglas]

Did yall know that the thread starter is a white...you got trolled.

 

[STEVE]

i am white but i would certainly die of secondhand embarrassment if i heard another white person say something like "what's crack-a-lackin'?" snoop dogg doesn't even sound cool when he says that.

 

[dr. pill biden]

I went to a high school full of dirty hipster fakkits (the early 2000s, before being a hipster was cool )

That shyt blew me ENDLESSLY. My home period only had 4 black folks and only 1 male. Every day it was some corny azz shyt. They knew not to say that bullshyt to me, but I would overhear a wack ass black people joke told ironically to the nikka and I'd just

 

[Commander in Chiefin]

I was at a bbq on the 4th and somehow the conversation turned into education and english and this one white cat was saying how he's still confused that words originally meant to be negative have now turned into positives i.e. sick, bad, etc. I claimed that as people evolve so does language, and he replied "Think about it, 50-100 years from now when they read about certain rappers being the 'illest', they're going to genuinely think that that person was terminally ill or had a disease".

 

[The Nigerian]

I was at a bbq on the 4th and somehow the conversation turned into education and english and this one white cat was saying how he's still confused that words originally meant to be negative have now turned into positives i.e. sick, bad, etc. I claimed that as people evolve so does language, and he replied "Think about it, 50-100 years from now when they read about certain rappers being the 'illest', they're going to genuinely think that that person was terminally ill or had a disease".

People caught up on that level of pettiness have no place in the new economy. Watch this dude flipping out because he can't understand his Indian bosses. People on that sh!t are as dumb as those chicks that are caught up on spelling. I bet the a$$hole you're talking about begs for tips waiting tables or some stupid sh!t.

 

[OPTiMO]

It doesn't have to be rare. I covered this already:

http://www.the-coli.com/locker-room/18837-loser-mentality-amongst-blacks.html



Yeah, that sh!t used to get me heated... like, to no end. For years I'd get the same *twinge* you get when you hear the N-Bomb being dropped. Just hearing that in any context could send me into a really negative space. I endured this for years. It was pretty infuriating, especially during that Vitamin Water deal the news would always introduce him as "Curtissss.... FIDDY CENT Jackson" while acting all shocked that a sales person from New York turned out to be a decent business man.

After years of suffering in silence I decided to get some answers. I think it was right around the time Curtis dropped and I overheard a white guy say it I asked him why he says 50 Cent like that. He looked at me, made a silly looking thinking face, then said "That's just how you say it. It's Fiddy!" Then it became very apparent to me that actually, that's just how white people say 50 Cent. But the question was still... why?

At first I thought that it was racism... but then I remembered that racism is just a condition of reality. Everything is racist depending on how you look at it. Even the sun is racist. So while that may be part of it, from my perspective it was easy to se that it definitely was not most of it. This dude wasn't even thinking about it on that level.

So this question weighed heavy on my mind for years after. I was at my apartment watching the TV and that weird SK commercial where 50 Cent is dealing steroids to Joan Rivers in the gym. This white girl that was just resting her head on my lap peaks her head up and blurts out "Ohmygaad, I have to try Fiddy's new energy shaaaaat!" And I had an epiphany. White people genuinely think his name pronounced "Fiddy" Cent. They think that's cool to say. I knew it wasn't racism because that chick definitely wasn't racist. And if she was, she put up a good act.

In the end, I think it was really silly of me to give so much of a sh!t about such pettiness... but I think my story will help those that still get the twinge. It's not that serious brehs...

just chill breh




essays arent necessary. (but props for writing all that)

 

[L@CaT]

White trash teenage girl with hoop earrings and bubble jacket: "HOLLERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR"

Fixed

 

[MoeDollaZ$]

the worse is when these white bytches got the balls to call me a nikka
Im like woah dere hoe i dont kno u like that then they try to play it off like thier down and shyt fuk that