BX is jokes thooo. I only fux with them and allhiphop forums, no mo simp tales for me. Over and out. If this aint funny you just hatin
I was in this classic thread...in tears my nikka:
Most embarrasing day of my life:
Blue Dream said: »
Six fu*king pages, read every post, classic thread, yall nikkas God damn. I gotta share one. This sh*t mad long but fu*k it.
This is back at the turn of the new millenium, fam had just moved South, I'm like 13 or so, it was one of them middle school summers. Older brother, like 15 years older, I'd always go post up at his house, file sharing had gotten popping and he was bootlegging hard, put me on game and I started flipping CDs, nikka used to have spindles upon spindles of CDs just laying around. I'd go through and get loaded up with music and also a couple discs of straight porn, vids took forever to load so I just opted for gallery dumps them early modern internet days were still rough, head back to the hood a week or so later and boom something silly, he also had just had his first son.
Anyway, one day me and my older sister are leaving his house when he stops by our grandmother's to pickup our mother, some sh*t grand had for my sister and help her setup her new computer. So we get there, moms there grands there whatever, couple aunts, uncle, its great grands crib and sh*t so the fam would be mad deep out that bi*ch.
Me my sister, brother, mother in the back and moms is asking bout pics of her new grandson and bro like oh Blue Dream got a disc of some new ones I'll go get em and heads for my bag, I kept my blade, bud, mad sh*t in my bag moving around nsh*t so I'm like nah I got you bro and get the spindle at my bag and go sit down at my grandmother's new computer nsh*t.
At this point we crowded around that bi*ch like
It's at this moment I realize the disc of his son is unlabeled, just like my porn pics (Titties don't make a good label, anything fake could inspire an "oh whats this", best to leave it blank, someone will assume its nothing if they come across it). Now I'm nervous as fu*k, stalling, shuffling discs, during this process my grandmother walking in with her sisters nsh*t, my mother telling em I'm bout to pull up new pics of the baby on the new computer, they old, this sh*t fancy, everybody wanna see, my female cousins in this bi*ch talking to my sister, older cousins catching up with my brother, everybody in the backroom around the computer waiting on me, now we deep like:
nikka I'm tense as fu*k, this sh*t like defusing a bomb, I cut the wrong wire its a wrap, I got like 15 eyes on the screen. Everyone chattering bout this and that that and this, I can't focus for sh*t. I pull all the blanks off the top, start looking at the backs to see which one is really burned and which one isn't, finally I pull out the 3 burned blanks and its literally a dice roll. I say fu*k it, my nerves like
but I pop the disc in the drive and decide to see what's behind Door #4.
This sh*t like a Price is Right showcase, autoplay starts off, Windows Explorer pops up and sh*t, all the blank boxes for the thumbnails are there, drive roaring, them old drives were loud, and I was right next to it so it was even louder, but the anticipation I was facing had that sh*t sounding like a jetengine, I felt like the Maxwell nikka on them cassette tapes who was getting blown out his chair by the speakers and sh*t. Just as it starts to die down,
titties everywhere. black titties, white titties, asian titties, red heads, blondes, midgets, fat bi*ches, indian titties, arabian titties, lesbians, bi*ches kissing playing with eachother titties, bi*ches squeezing they titties together, bi*ches rubbing chocolate sauce on they titties, whip cream on other bi*ches titties, dildos between the titties, pulling they nipples nsh*t, they coming up in like waves of 5 and sh*t in sets milliseconds apart.
Room just falls dead silent, inside I'm like
its a wrap, I'm bout to get beat with so many switches, nikkas gonna kill a whole tree fu*king me up in here. My brother lets out a sort of sigh/restrained laugh and just turns and leaves out cause he know its about to get ugly, my sister letting little restrained giggles/exhales out and a few seconds/eons later she leave out and some of my cousins go with her.
I never looked up never turned around so i don't know who still in the room, i'm staring at the keys and my piles of music CDs tryna sing the tracks on em in my head to take myself out the moment. My mom reaches over and cuts the screen off, I glance up in the reflection and she right next to me just looking dead at the side of my face, my grandmother, aunts grandaunts and uncles big cousins all them reflected in the screen standing behind me just staring at me like
Right then my mama says in the calmest voice "Dream, you nasty muthafu*ka, I'm bout to beat your ass", as if I ain't know that. But first they gonna make me destroy my smut, but none of these muhfu*kas know how to work the CD drive so i gotta take it out and hand it to em, I'm still looking dead at the keys. I get the disc out they make me snap it up and tell me throw the pieces away, as I get up to go over to the trash can them nikkas surround me like they bout to stomp me out and everybody just start talking sh*t "ol nasty ass" "pervert" "whats wrong with you" "you disgusting". It was like a disciplinary slanderous cypher, all that was missing was somebody beatboxing. They feeding off eachothers lines nsh*t, mad as hell. whole time I'm tryna sit there with the straight face and look at the wall, cause I been stopped crying nsh*t, but I feel that embarassment heat yall mentioned like fu*k, I'm so zoned on the wall tryna get out the moment, focus on these songs, I ain't notice everybody taking they belts off.
Just then my mama smacked the sh*t out me, sh*t spun me, I would then be spinning for the next 5 minutes as everybody just started wacking me with they belts and sh*t, continuing their "pervert" chants, sh*t was like a fu*ked up version of the scarlet letter, I'm getting spun like a dradle having my ass whipped by like 12 people at once. finally grandmoms just threw on the bed and was like "don't even wanna look at you" and they all mobbed out like the warriors.
nikka I felt so defeated. I'm laying there, couple tears finally drop now that I got some privacy nsh*t, looking over my welps, that's when everybody realize they ain't get to see the baby pictures, and return to the room with my brother to have him get the CD and load em. But they still ain't wanna look at me so they kicked me out the room and I had to take that walk of shame to go carry out my afterbeating isolation in another room past the crowd, nikkas really ain't look at me either b.
I'm in the other room sweating, how bro gonna know which disc is the one, he bout to get me fu*ked up again, sh*t, come to find out, the nikka did label the sh*t, it was never on my spindle, all 3 of my CDs were porn. The nikka had it on his own spindle in the car. He goes out to get it after he ain't see it in my stack and I can hear them cooing and oohing and aahing through the walls nsh*t between jokes and criticisms of my porn disc. Black sheep life.
the end.
.Ben might be a fukkboy jury still out....
too many beta orbiters around you.
.
"
