Essential The Official Coli Horror Film Thread: Discussion, Recommendations And Murder.

storyteller

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So I peeped a thriller called Humane. It's set in a dystopian future where resources are low, so the government institutes a program where people volunteer to die and their family's are taken care of. A wealthy father invites his spoiled children to dinner, where he informs them that he's signed up for the program along with his wife. But when a team arrives to put the father and wife down, things don't go as planned.

This trailer kinda gives away a bit, but it's kinda the only way to get where the premise is going...


It's takes a little while to get going but it's not bad. The characters are kinda all A-holes, but that works for these kinda social satires. It's nothing special, but the premise is cool and the performances are fun.
 

abominable1

the fukkery, the sweet ,sweet fukkery
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Jello Biafra

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The Strangers Chapter One was complete ass.

Renny Harlin basically did a remix of the original Strangers but failed in every way that Bryan Bertino was successful with the original film. There was no atmosphere of foreboding; no fear for the couple being stalked; nothing worth being excited about at all.

The overreliance on the masked killers being preternaturally silent ninjas who could do ridiculous shyt like sit in a rocking chair 2 feet away from a waiting victim and not be noticed became fukking ridiculous by the 4th time that it happened.

Also copying the first movie by focusing on a couple in an isolated house in the middle of nowhere only works if the couple are interesting. The couple in Chapter 1 were bland trash and I didn't care if they lived or died. At certain points I was mad that they escaped attempts on their life because they sucked so bad.

The thing that made The Strangers: Prey At Night such a fun follow up movie was that it went in an entirely different direction from the first movie and focused on a family as the victims and a trailer park/vacation complex as the location. That opened things up to be original. Focusing on just two people was a huge mistake and while I'm not saying it would've made the movie better, maybe if the victims were a group of friends staying in a cabin in the woods things would've at least been more interesting.

This movie was just terrible and they will not get me to go out to a movie theater to see the next two installments...Imma pirate those shyts.

I give "The Strangers Chapter One" 1 out 4 Gun Totin' Dr. Loomis'
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Jello Biafra

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Jello Biafra

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Hoping something good can come out of that Strangers trilogy reboot because all I’ve been asking lately is “Why?”.

Peeped the trailer and thought it over-dramatized a few bits that were otherwise subtle, yet effective in the OG entry. I feel like the killers in this one are gonna strike a pose or some shyt before dropping the infamous “…Because you were home” line.
There were so many scenes of the killers striking poses in the background or being thisclose to their victims without being noticed. shyt was ridiculous.
 

Jello Biafra

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Watched ‘The Rental’ last night. I don’t think I’ve ever rooted for a killer to finish the job as hard as I did here. The main characters were that unlikeable. :skip:

Movie didn’t blow me away but I wanna see what else Franco can do in future horror projects. There is some potential there. The way he styled the ending credits was really clever and unsettling.
I hated everyone in The Rental except for the killer.
I appreciated the choice to have him be so no-nonsense with the way he was murking people. Dude was moving like he got paid by the hour and his company didn't offer overtime pay.
 

Jello Biafra

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Hospital Massacre (1981)
aka xray




underrated 80's slasher
pacing gets a bit wonky near the final chase, but worth checking out if you need something to wtahc
most likelyn on youtube

Hospital Massacre is one of my absolute favorite "so bad it's good" horror movies.

This scene still cracks me up no matter how many times I see it:
 

Jello Biafra

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Watched some flicks while we meal prepped the other day

The haunting of the Queen Mary (2023)


Wish.com Shining on a cruise ship
head scratcher of a plot,
Not entertained at all

founders day ( 2024)


its actually an entertaining low budget slasher & meta political slasher spliced together
decent twist as well

& back on my 80's kick
the hand (1981)



Classic slow descent into madness flick with excellent acting.

Michael Caine stars
Oliver Stone directed
Stan winston on th FX

The Haunting of Queen Mary was a mess.

Liked Founders Day well enough but felt it fumbled the ending.

The Hand is great. Michael Caine was chewing up all the scenery in the most glorious fashion.
 
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