The many L's I took during last 3 years of my 13 year marriage.

Mordith

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It's not about whether the marriage works out or not from my perspective. It's the fact that a single man would lower his standards & principles along with adding limitations & options to one's lifestyle during the prime years of their life to marry a woman with kids & dealing with another mans responsibilities raising their children which I'm scrutinizing.

You hit the nail on the head with this breh and I guarantee when he initially :cape:the only thing she was bringing to the table was pussay. :rudy:
 

SheWantTheD

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I'm assuming she didn't want to move because she still wanted some of that thug dikk no?
 

MrWestGrand

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TL;DR: Married for almost 13 years, she cheats with scumbag dude. I beg for her back. Got my pimp hand strong and told her basically to fukk off. Fighting over custody of our 4 kids because she has her scumbag boyfriend, drugs and guns around my kids. Now i'm on my :birdman: when dealing with women.

So long story short, exw (EX-WIFE) and I been together for16 and married for 13. For the majority of our marriage, everything went well exept these past 3 years. We moved to GA because of the Army training and was suppose to move in a few more months after being there. Her concern was that the kids would only be in school for 7 to 8 months and would not leave with me. We went back and forth on this a lot. To make things better, I decided to go to the middle east for a year so that my family can stay here in GA and have some stability.

I get to Kuwait…

While there, about a few months in, I call her and say that the army was going to move us when I get back. She wasn’t having it. She told me that “I can move by myself” and that she wasn’t going anywhere. I begged and pleaded for her not to be that way. A new unit just stood up at Fort Gordon so as I worked my 16 hour days (with no days off), I get all the IT certs needed to get into that new unit. While studying and working, I notice on facebook after a while, she’s in all the clubs with her ring off and hanign with some hoes that I aint never seen before (Que hotline bling here). Red Flag #1 I asked her why didn’t she wear her ring? She responded that she was afraid that it’ll get lost :mindblown: I didn’t press anymore….

Then, one day she hits me up on facebook asking me for my fb password. I didn’t give it to her and asked her why she need it. She said that because there is a girl that is saying that she is messing with her boyfriend; my exw said he is “only a friend”. Red flag #2. I check my PM’s and sure enough, some old ass thot is in my shyt saying that my exw is all on her man and shyt. I confront my exw about it but she still denies it. I never seen any pics of her and him on facebook, so I leave it at that.

I come home for good…. By this time, there are no more red flags, she’s been having a relationship with this nikka.

That first week back was great. We had fun. Then one day, we our out in our backyard drinking and enjoying our outside fireplace. She says “hey, I’ll brb”. I said okay, np. After about a good 30 minutes, I go check up on her. She’s in our room, on the floor, drunk saying that “I miss you and I want to be with you and that you are the only that makes me happy”. Blood I was pissed. I didn’t kick down the door (the door was cracked so I can see and hear her). She gets done and she comes down stairs outside to meet up with me, I confront her about it. She said I misunderstood her and all that shyt. I was pissed. I begged for her to work on things for a few months later, she was so distant.

One day I go in her room to find a power cord for my ipad, I open her night stand and there is a fukking condom in there. :mjcry: I confront her about it and she said her “friend” left it in her purse for her to hold. Me being an idiot wanted to believe and even psyched myself into believing it.

She eventually gets a job and starts going to school to be a medical assistant. She would go to work, come home and then go to school. School got out at 8 for her. But when she comes home, she said she’s leaving to go study at her “friends”. So she leaves and comes back at 9, then 10, then 10:30, then 12, then 2 am, 4 an even 12 noon the next day over weeks. Mind you as she is gone, I’m doing all of the fukking chores, cooking, cleaning, doing homework with the kids… all that.

We agree to split up and I agree to help her get back on her feet… little did I know, she was just manipulating me to get what she wanted. She diddn’t love me even though I was blind to it. :wow:

Then she started having this nikka driving around in the car that I pay for, 2010 Nissan Armada Platinum. She’s bringing my kids around this dude; he was arrested for arm robbery, assault with a deadly weapon, shyt load of dui’s –just all around a piece of work:francis:. Then one day, she had the balls to post on facebook that she was with her “new man”, going to the Mary J. Blige concert here in Augusta. She blocked from facebook a while ago, so I didn’t know that. But my moms told me. I filed for divorce after that; so embarrassing that all our “friends” liked that fukking status with her and POS fakkit. All them nikkas I cut off from facebook too. All of them. Then they get pissed on my? :mindblown: :pacspit:

Mind you, she also posting on facebook this pink hand gun that dude bought for her. My two boys loves guns, there are 6 and 9 – this dumbass girl got the gun in her room, fully loaded with no damn lock and not even in a case talking about “its okay, they ain’t gonna get to it”. shyt. I went to the store and bought a gunlock and case for it. Do you believe this dumb bytch had the gun outside of it again and loaded. I called her and said that the next time I see this gun not locked up and not in its case, it’s getting thrown in the river.

She also had drugs around my kdis that they can get access to (weed). All though it’s a mild drug and I really don’t consider it bad, I don’t want my kids around that stuff AT ALL.

She get’s served with divorce papers at her job…

So we go to court. The judge says that we must maintain the status quo. I am asking for full custody. The judge ordered that she pays the groceries only, and I pay the bills and mortgage. My attorney and I inform the judge about the drugs, the gun, her being gon all the time and that her boyfriend is POS. The judge asks her, “what does your boyfriend do”? She replies: “he’s a bouncer at a bar and he WORKS AT TACO BELL!”. :dead: :what:The judge was like :mjlol:

Will dumbass exw decides to move over the course of weeks. Slowly but surely. This past weekend, I tell her “get the last of your shyt and leave”. I leave to go to south Carolina to visit some friends. I come home Sunday – EVERYTHING is gone save my bedroom items, my game room and the sofa’s downstairs. Pots, pans, pictures, you name it, it’s gone.:martin:

I call my lawyer and tell him what’s up. I send him pics and he said that’s good, she’s going against the court orders. I ask if I can stop paying her bills, he said don’t because right now, she’s digging her own grave. On the 22nd of March we have our mediation date and hopefully soon after that the final hearing with the judge. I’ll update this after the court date….

But I say all that to say this: it was a painful 3 years of my life. It took me a while to find myself. I look back now at all the dumb shyt I didn’t want to see and deal with. I can spot women that are about that bullshyt from miles away. Dealing with the exw now is even easier, I could care less for anything that she does. She gots her own place, but mind I am still paying the car notes, the insurance, cell phone bills and shyt like that. Not because I want to, but because the court said so until the hearing is finalized. But trust me, as soon as that gavel is slammed that bytch is getting cut the fukk off from everything.

She makes $11 an hour, around $1760 a month. I make $7500 a month…. She wants the children because of the child support. I want the children because she is unfit. It’s so sad to what she has become. Even her own family wants me to take the kids. I won’t keep the kids from her, but I will protect them. They need me as their father to show them the right way of going at life, not the fast way d-boy bullshyt that her boy friend.

To the guys in the shyt with their wives/girlfriends. Never ever put up with their shyt. The best experience out of all of this is that I give zero fukks about a woman’s feelings anymore. Girls don’t wanna hit me up, they wanna play games, “oh my girlfriends in town” old tired ass excuse then :camby: My confidence in myself is at an all time high. Even today, exw called and was like “how are you?, what did you do today?” Me: What do you want? :birdman: so the exw is like :mjcry: Now that I am single in my own house, I answer to no one. I get my kids and we chill.

I’m not a hater, I hope and wish her the best. But for the record, she will never ever have anyone like me. Mind you, we go together young, I was 18 and she was 19. She already had a 16 month old when we first met. I adopted her when she was 4 and we moved away from family. I was the best thing that ever happened to her, but for whatever reason, she stuck on stupid. Not my problem anymore. I just need to take care of the kids.

Like I said, there's more, but we haven't had mediation or the final hearing... but I will update this as I go on with all this madness. One thing for sure, I am at peace and I aint dealing with any bullshyt anymore. I can look at myself and say that I was totally 100% faithful all these years and given her a life that she would never had to worry about. She never had to work a day in her life and could have spent it with me, but instead, she decided to hustle backwards. :rudy:

My pimp hand has been rejuvenated:smugbiden: I already got hoes crying over me now, but I ain't fukking with anyone on that level. these next few years is just me by myself doing whatever I want to do. I don't think I'll get married again to be honest but who knows.
707....:ohhh:If you from the fields homie, then I :salute:you cause them chics are next level Thots.
 

Jimi Swagger

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Damn :mjcry:





Marriage and the military just doesn't mix
No it works they just seem to get married straight out of highschool which is doomed for failure. I understand after doing a combat tour you need something warm and soft to come home too and cook a meal after being in a bunker. Sadly most of those mil spouses are the biggest whores when their partner is deployed.
 

Mr. Jack Napier

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he married her over ten years ago, she might have been legit then. if you nikkas are gonna castigate the OP then do it for not seeing the signs or handling bizness the past 3 years. telling her he shouldn't have married is some really pointless, shytty advice. people change, grow apart, etc. how the fukk would he have known that she would cheat on him a decade later. if anything if she was the type to cheat she should have started becoming clumsy years ago then OP wouldn't have had to be invested in her adopted child.

Fam, she was under 21, and already had a child with another man, that's a flag right there. Any man with some type of sense is going to stay clear of a situation like that.
 
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No it works they just seem to get married straight out of highschool which is doomed for failure. I understand after doing a combat tour you need something warm and soft to come home too and cook a meal after being in a bunker. Sadly most of those mil spouses are the biggest whores when their partner is deployed.

True most of the guys I know ended up getting married right before our first deployment or got married after boot leave and it was hell on they out on them mainly because them or their wives have never left home and are pretty damn immature to start off with.

So now you have a chick getting everything paid for and probably not working chilling in the house for 7 months to a year. Just to be reasonable I'd say it's a 50/50 chance she's gonna go look for some D.

Hell I had a girlfriend that cheated on my on my first deployment and that made me the savage I am today. I met my wife after that and we got married while I was out of the deployment rotation for awhile but if you get married before during your first enlistment you're hustling backwards
 

jwonder

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Y'all got together mad young, well y'all known each other since y'all was late teens. She might've felt like she was missing something, like reliving those single years and was mentally stunted. I've known my husband since I was 18 (just shy of turning 19) and I only married him when I was 28. Not because I felt like I was missing out, but because mentally I don't think I understood the responsibility and the duties I had to fulfill as a wife and him as a husband. Im glad you are self advocating and most importantly advocating for your kids. Props. :salute: they shouldn't be kept away from their mother but she's clearly not fit to be a care giver.
It's always best to get the hoe stage out of the way. That's for male and female. Also going out and just having fun. Marrying early isn't good because 9 times out of 10 nobody is mature at 18 to damn near 25.
 
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O.G.B

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Yeah. I would never do that. So many different scenarios that just doesn't make it appealing.

Agreed! Why even bother dealing with & raising some other man/woman's child when you can have a family & kids of your own. :yeshrug:
 

iceberg_is_on_fire

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I feel your pain breh. I think us brehs that been through similar shyt wears those scars and can picture ourselves in your shoes. Good shyt on moving on.

I have a custody case with my ex-wife next week. I'm going to make a thread about it because I'm going to destroy her and I want to put people up on game on how to do this if they are serious about getting their seeds. Phone calls recorded, emails, texts, pictures, police files, county court visits and documentation, medical records & facebook posts. I even get her fam reaching out to me to get the kids, best believe that shyts been recorded. shyt about to look like a Killer Instinct Ultra up in the courtroom.

This is where there needs to be solidarity from all of us in the struggle.
 
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