The Curse of the Side-Baby: The Dallas Cowboys 22’ Offseason Thread

[Dallas' 4 Eva]

Damn.

He's 100% right though. Does Dak need to learn to spot a blitz, fukking right. Does that excuse the defense getting balls rammed down their throats like Gianna Michaels, nope. There is a reason I'm harping on better DTs in here. The biggest weakness of this team is right in front of peoples faces, but it's cool to just blame the QB for everything.

 

[El Bombi]

He's 100% right though. Does Dak need to learn to spot a blitz, fukking right. Does that excuse the defense getting balls rammed down their throats like Gianna Michaels, nope. There is a reason I'm harping on better DTs in here. The biggest weakness of this team is right in front of peoples faces, but it's cool to just blame the QB for everything.

 

[Ethnic Vagina Finder]

I'm so tired of this whole organization I can't even get motivated to talk about offseason moves or debate right now. Whole organization from top to bottom just got me feeling detached as all hell . Once draft comes around it should restore the feeling but for now I'm

I became detached after the Arizona game. That game was basically a playoff dress rehearsal and they failed.

 

[Ohene]

That's why I stopped responding. nikka act like we got Aaron Donald and Nndamukong Suh or something, our interior Dline has been complete ass for over a decade now.

Facts

 

[Dallas' 4 Eva]

That's the only way I can put it. Go to every single playoff loss we have had since Dak became a starter to be fair.

Packers '16 - 87 yards rushing (the only time we stopped the run and we wasted it, Dak outplayed Aaron Rodgers in this game)
Rams '18 - 273 yards rushing(fukking playoff record, shyt was PITIFUL)
49ers '22 - 169 yards rushing

Our last two playoff losses have hands down been mostly because not only were we not able to stop the run we also didn't break 100 yards rushing in either of those games.

Stopping the run works the same way as being able to run does, it starts in the middle not on the edges. Our DT's suck dikk like Teanna Trump. Even if we fixed that problem we still need to address the fact our #1 corner gave up over 1000 yards this season, I don't give a damn how many INT's he had.

There is a lot of shyt wrong with this team, that HAS BEEN WRONG WITH THIS TEAM FOR YEARS that needs to be addressed before we even get to Dak.

 

[El Bombi]

Facts

The facts that the Eagles kept winning and wasn't able to draft Ja'Marr Chase.

 

[Ohene]

The facts that the Eagles kept winning and wasn't able to draft Ja'Marr Chase.

What you mean

 

[Ashyneezz]

Bring in a qb guru to help Dak read defenses.

Wish Dak was as tight with Romo as Parsons is with DWare

 

[Ashyneezz]

This is crazy to me. Because he's a free agent. I guess he's content with coming back to the Cowboys on a 1 year deal, and showing out. Which is good for us

Hope he shows out after betting on himself. Seems like a good dude

 

[El Bombi]

Wish Dak was as tight with Aikman as Parsons is with DWare

Fixed

 

[Codeine Bryant]

Woke up this morning and realized it really is all Zeke’s fault

Maybe if Zeke could run for 4.3 ypc, Dak could read a zone defense going into his 7th year

Maybe if Zeke could run for 4.3 ypc, Cooper wouldn’t be so disgruntled and our other Pro Bowl WR wouldn’t finish the playoff game with one whole catch

Maybe if Zeke could run for 4.3 ypc, we wouldn’t have so many presnap penalties and holding calls

Maybe if Zeke could run for 4.3 ypc, we wouldn’t have so many balls batted down at the LoS or under/overthrows


Goddamn you, Zeke

 

[Codeine Bryant]

That's the only way I can put it. Go to every single playoff loss we have had since Dak became a starter to be fair.

Packers '16 - 87 yards rushing (the only time we stopped the run and we wasted it, Dak outplayed Aaron Rodgers in this game)
Rams '18 - 273 yards rushing(fukking playoff record, shyt was PITIFUL)
49ers '22 - 169 yards rushing

Our last two playoff losses have hands down been mostly because not only were we not able to stop the run we also didn't break 100 yards rushing in either of those games.

Stopping the run works the same way as being able to run does, it starts in the middle not on the edges. Our DT's suck dikk like Teanna Trump. Even if we fixed that problem we still need to address the fact our #1 corner gave up over 1000 yards this season, I don't give a damn how many INT's he had.

There is a lot of shyt wrong with this team, that HAS BEEN WRONG WITH THIS TEAM FOR YEARS that needs to be addressed before we even get to Dak.

Defense held KC to 19
Defense held SF to 16 if you don’t count the 7 off Dak’s terrible INT

What else do they need to do?

They need to hold the opposition under 100 yards rushing, under 250 yards passing, get at least 2 turnovers, and at least 3-4 sacks?

Then and only then does Dak have what he needs?

Meanwhile other teams with franchise QBs don’t have to worry about scoring 20 points in big games. It’s just assumed. But not in Dallas…

I don’t want to hear about no DTs or LBs or Safeties. What does that even matter? If Cooper, Lamb, Schultz, Zeke/Pollard, Tyron, La’el, Martin can’t even get us 20 goddamn points, we don’t deserve to fukking win. Who is holding the opponent to less than 20 consistently besides a messy weather game like SF-GB?

Do Murray, Wilson, Mahomes, Burrow, Herbert, Rodgers, Allen, Stafford, Brady NEED their defense to keep it under 20 points allowed to win a big game?

So why the fukk is that an absolute requirement for our QB?

 

[Dallas' 4 Eva]

Defense held KC to 19
Defense held SF to 16 if you don’t count the 7 off Dak’s terrible INT

What else do they need to do?

They need to hold the opposition under 100 yards rushing, under 250 yards passing, get at least 2 turnovers, and at least 3-4 sacks?

Then and only then does Dak have what he needs?

Meanwhile other teams with franchise QBs don’t have to worry about scoring 20 points in big games. It’s just assumed. But not in Dallas…

I don’t want to hear about no DTs or LBs or Safeties. What does that even matter? If Cooper, Lamb, Schultz, Zeke/Pollard, Tyron, La’el, Martin can’t even get us 20 goddamn points, we don’t deserve to fukking win. Who is holding the opponent to less than 20 consistently besides a messy weather game like SF-GB?

Do Murray, Wilson, Mahomes, Burrow, Herbert, Rodgers, Allen, Stafford, Brady NEED their defense to keep it under 20 points allowed to win a big game?

So why the fukk is that an absolute requirement for our QB?

Bruh you are on such a Dak hate train you are ignoring all the other obvious flaws with this team. The defense isn't the only problem, our offensive line isn't good anymore, I didn't wholly blame Zeke for the struggles of our running game it's more so on the line. Also we led the league in fukking penalties, a good amount of them were by the line. Trying to pile all the blame on Dak(just like they did Romo before him) is why this team never gets anywhere. Start addressing the glaring flaws this team has had for over a decade, and stop just blaming it all on the QB just because you don't like him because he took Romo's spot.

 

[Codeine Bryant]

Bruh you are on such a Dak hate train you are ignoring all the other obvious flaws with this team. The defense isn't the only problem, our offensive line isn't good anymore, I didn't wholly blame Zeke for the struggles of our running game it's more so on the line. Also we led the league in fukking penalties, a good amount of them were by the line. Trying to pile all the blame on Dak(just like they did Romo before him) is why this team never gets anywhere. Start addressing the glaring flaws this team has had for over a decade, and stop just blaming it all on the QB just because you don't like him because he took Romo's spot.

I don’t like Dak for a lot of reasons, you’re right. He makes it easy to dislike him.

However, I have a much easier time admitting that the OL sucks, the coaching is nonexistent, Zeke is past his prime and injured, and our defense is soft up the middle than a lot of you have admitting that Dak just ain’t that guy.

We spend hundreds of millions of dollars and a litany of 1st, 2nd, and 3rd round picks on the offense. And we’re not even sure if we can get 20 points when it matters in a big game. But defense is the issue?

It’s like spending $300 on groceries, cooking dinner, and when it tastes like shyt, you blame the $10 bottle of wine you paired it with. Hey, maybe, just maybe, you fukked up spending all that money on those groceries? Maybe you don’t know what to do with those groceries? Maybe those are $100 groceries you overspent on? It might not be the wine’s fault why the turkey and broccoli and Mac and cheese and collard greens all taste like shyt. Just a thought.

Don’t you think there’s something seriously wrong when the off-season chatter is “okay guys, how do we beef up the defense so we can keep the opponent under 16 points to make it winnable for Dak!”

Again, why does Dak need this when Mahomes, Brady, Allen, Wilson, Stafford, Herbert, Burrow, Murray, Rodgers don’t?

Please, I’m anxious to know why Dak needs such accommodations when other franchise QBs are expected to score 20-24+ in the big games. Meanwhile ours looks like a deer in headlights for half the game.

Prime Aaron Donald would be wasted on this roster, just like prime Micah Parsons currently is.

 

[Dallas' 4 Eva]

I don’t like Dak for a lot of reasons, you’re right. He makes it easy to dislike him.

However, I have a much easier time admitting that the OL sucks, the coaching is nonexistent, Zeke is past his prime and injured, and our defense is soft up the middle than a lot of you have admitting that Dak just ain’t that guy.

We spend hundreds of millions of dollars and a litany of 1st, 2nd, and 3rd round picks on the offense. And we’re not even sure if we can get 20 points when it matters in a big game. But defense is the issue?

It’s like spending $300 on groceries, cooking dinner, and when it tastes like shyt, you blame the $10 bottle of wine you paired it with. Hey, maybe, just maybe, you fukked up spending all that money on those groceries? Maybe you don’t know what to do with those groceries? Maybe those are $100 groceries you overspent on? It might not be the wine’s fault why the turkey and broccoli and Mac and cheese and collard greens all taste like shyt. Just a thought.

Don’t you think there’s something seriously wrong when the off-season chatter is “okay guys, how do we beef up the defense so we can keep the opponent under 16 points to make it winnable for Dak!”

Again, why does Dak need this when Mahomes, Brady, Allen, Wilson, Stafford, Herbert, Burrow, Murray, Rodgers don’t?

Please, I’m anxious to know why Dak needs such accommodations when other franchise QBs are expected to score 20-24+ in the big games. Meanwhile ours looks like a deer in headlights for half the game.

Prime Aaron Donald would be wasted on this roster, just like prime Micah Parsons currently is.

Did I not say Dak needs to learn how to spot a blitz? I don't absolve Dak from his blame, all y'all just seem to think he is the only problem with this team and he isn't. You are missing that point, Dak is a new variable to the equation. The teams inability to stop the run, and tackle in the open field are not. I have seen much worse QBs than Dak win or get to SBs. Hell Shanahan and McVay were able to get Jimmy G and Goff to super bowls, and Dak is better than both of them bruh. Washed Peyton Manning who couldn't throw the ball 15 yards. Eli Manning isn't that good he was able to do it. Trent fukking Dilfer. There are reasons they were able to do it or even get there in the first place. This team isn't built as a whole to win in January, at least not to contend with the top dogs.