Tell the story of an embarrassing moment in your life

[Ed MOTHERFUCKING G]

Yo, I'm at work dying right now!!!! I'll share my stories

It was the first day of my junior year....it was also my birthday. I was wearing my "first day of school" outfit that I had so carefully picked out. I was looking fly, also because I had lost my baby fat over the summer and I was looking good, turning heads, etc.......but I also just started my period like the day before and I'm a SUPER heavy bleeder. So I'm in first period finding any excuse to walk up to the pencil sharpener or the trash so people would see how much weight I lost and to look at my plump booty Second period comes...and I'm doing the same thing, then all of sudden when I sit down the girl behind me who I was cool with whispers in my ear "You've got a huge blood stain in the back of your pants"

I ran to the bathroom, took off my pants and was standing the in the girl's bathroom ass all out trying to get as much blood out as I could. Girls were coming in laughing and shyt. I didn't get it all out, but I met up with my best friend after class who let me wear her sweater around my waist for the rest of the day. Ruined my outfit, my birthday and my first day of school.

Other story:

I was in like 2nd or 3rd grade and I had the runs something crazy. My mom still sent me to school because she thought I was better since I didn't shyt all night. I'm up in class and the bubble guts starts. I'm trying to push through it, but then my booty hole just gives out and I shytted all over myself. I ran to the teacher to try and go to the bathroom before it started running down my leg......luckily I had stockings on so it kinda contained it a little bit.

So I go to the bathroom.....try and get as much out as I can and then try and clean myself up. Being a dumb ass little kid, I tried get rid of my dirty ass stockings and underwear so I tried to flush them down the toilet The toilet overflowed and shyt water started getting everywhere....so now my socks and shoes are all shytty. There were other kids in the bathroom already laughing and "Ewww"ing becuase of the smell and the fart noises so I didn't wanna leave the bathroom stall I guess one of them went to get a teacher, and they coaxed me out the stall crying my eyes out. They took me to the nurse and all the kids were laughing and pointing at me while I was walking down the hall. They called my mom and she came and got me.

You was a bloody ass, shytty ass, disgusting little bytch for real.

 

[Ashyneezz]

Not my story but...

I remember my junior year of college I was taking this history class in one of those huge lecture halls, it had like 400 seats. This girl walks in late and like always the back rows were full so she had to walk down toward the bottom rows. About half way through this broad loses his balance and takes a tumble a few ppl including myself bust out , but others were on some "omg are you ok?" trying to help her up and ish.

 

[Sansprix]

You was a bloody ass, shytty ass, disgusting little bytch for real.

I couldn't help it man

 

[HalfwayHandsome]

One nite my swagger was on amille. Im fly, car clean, music banging, Im riding i see this fine ass chick walking down the street, i got my homie with me so i told him Imma get her! Str8 stuntin! I told her.let me holla and she said pull over. Im by this pawn shop parking lot so i decided to cut through. WRONG, it was nite time so i didnt see they had a chain blocking the parking lot. shyt Damn near tore my bumper in half. Im still trynna mack like its no big deal even tho inside i was she was looking anyway i got the number the whole my homie is i never looked at the damage till i got home trynna play it off like it was no big deal. When i saw the damage i never called her and still to this day my homie brings it up.

 

[skeetsinternal]

Before Google Voice, I unsuccessfully tried to *67 a text to a chic. She ended up seeing my real number.

 

[ROFL_GUY]

about a year ago i was @ this house party

eeryone was outside in the front around the pool( was @ night) the pool is in the front yard so there prob 60 heads there ass to elbow around this pool

so im tippin vodka drinkin smokin etc...


I WALKED STRAIT INTO THE POOL.. . without even knowin

The entire party stops and i get clowned to death as im liftin myself up from the edge of the water..



shyt was embarasing...

 

[duncanthetall]

Other story:

I was in like 2nd or 3rd grade and I had the runs something crazy. My mom still sent me to school because she thought I was better since I didn't shyt all night. I'm up in class and the bubble guts starts. I'm trying to push through it, but then my booty hole just gives out and I shytted all over myself. I ran to the teacher to try and go to the bathroom before it started running down my leg......luckily I had stockings on so it kinda contained it a little bit.

So I go to the bathroom.....try and get as much out as I can and then try and clean myself up. Being a dumb ass little kid, I tried get rid of my dirty ass stockings and underwear so I tried to flush them down the toilet The toilet overflowed and shyt water started getting everywhere....so now my socks and shoes are all shytty. There were other kids in the bathroom already laughing and "Ewww"ing becuase of the smell and the fart noises so I didn't wanna leave the bathroom stall I guess one of them went to get a teacher, and they coaxed me out the stall crying my eyes out. They took me to the nurse and all the kids were laughing and pointing at me while I was walking down the hall. They called my mom and she came and got me.

 

[Kuro]

Other story:

I was in like 2nd or 3rd grade and I had the runs something crazy. My mom still sent me to school because she thought I was better since I didn't shyt all night. I'm up in class and the bubble guts starts. I'm trying to push through it, but then my booty hole just gives out and I shytted all over myself. I ran to the teacher to try and go to the bathroom before it started running down my leg......luckily I had stockings on so it kinda contained it a little bit.

So I go to the bathroom.....try and get as much out as I can and then try and clean myself up. Being a dumb ass little kid, I tried get rid of my dirty ass stockings and underwear so I tried to flush them down the toilet The toilet overflowed and shyt water started getting everywhere....so now my socks and shoes are all shytty. There were other kids in the bathroom already laughing and "Ewww"ing becuase of the smell and the fart noises so I didn't wanna leave the bathroom stall I guess one of them went to get a teacher, and they coaxed me out the stall crying my eyes out. They took me to the nurse and all the kids were laughing and pointing at me while I was walking down the hall. They called my mom and she came and got me.

i shyt on myself in the 2nd grade...the class could smell it but didnt know i was the mystery shytter...recess comes and i decide to go down the slide head first and i hear a classmate behind me say.. '***** has the doo doo'...the end.

 

[Mantle Drunk]

about a year ago i was @ this house party

eeryone was outside in the front around the pool( was @ night) the pool is in the front yard so there prob 60 heads there ass to elbow around this pool

so im tippin vodka drinkin smokin etc...


I WALKED STRAIT INTO THE POOL.. . without even knowin

The entire party stops and i get clowned to death as im liftin myself up from the edge of the water..



shyt was embarasing...

Mines similar partying around a pool at this party of this bytch that lives in a mansion with all her hot rich chick friends. They had a kiddie pool that the dog would go into i guess they bathed the dog in it. I had my back turned to it and one of my friends was like yo take a couple of steps back I had seen it so I knew what he was trying to do but for some reason I thought it would be really cool to take a couple of steps back stop and be like did you really think I would fall for that shyt . Well I miscalculated it and took a few steps back and tripped right into the pool I bounced back up real quick tryin to play it off but I was soaking wet and all the chicks were all I got up looked around went straight up to my friend who drove and asked him to drive me home he said no so the whole rest of the time i was sitting there

 

[SCORCH]

One nite my swagger was on amille. Im fly, car clean, music banging, Im riding i see this fine ass chick walking down the street, i got my homie with me so i told him Imma get her! Str8 stuntin! I told her.let me holla and she said pull over. Im by this pawn shop parking lot so i decided to cut through. WRONG, it was nite time so i didnt see they had a chain blocking the parking lot. shyt Damn near tore my bumper in half. Im still trynna mack like its no big deal even tho inside i was she was looking anyway i got the number the whole my homie is i never looked at the damage till i got home trynna play it off like it was no big deal. When i saw the damage i never called her and still to this day my homie brings it up.

 

[Pool_Shark]

Freshmen year of high school. I came in late on the football team and was known as Rookie. I sucked at football but wanted to play cause that's what my whole family has done in high school. At practices I would fall and trip n shyt. One game I luck out and sack the QB in the 4th quarter. For a week straight I was feeling like Warren Sapp

Next game of the season when were going over the plays my coach is like "Rookie, I'm going to have you be 2nd string this game" I was nervous as fukk. 3rd quarter the D tackle gets hurt and they put me in.

"Alright Shark this is your chance don't fukk it up." My stomach had crazy butterflies, all my homies were watching on the sidelines, a few girls in the stand. It's Game Time!

I get out on the field and realize I don't have my mouth piece. What do I do, oh shyt what the fukk. I just get up before the play even starts and run to the sidelines everyone is giving me the . "I forgot my mouthpiece, I can't find it." Finally find it, get back out there eager like a beaver. "Hut hut..." I move. Penalty Offsides. By now my coaches are like

Finally get settled in ready for war no more fukk ups. "HIKE" everyone explodes on the D line but me. I was looking at the dudes around me and get caught off guard. The Right Guard was this huge somoan cat and dude just knocks me the fukk over. I land on my ass embarrassed as fukk . I get up and the both teams are hysterically. Get on the sidelines and all my friends had jokes. Got clowned for that the rest of the season.


Needless to say I rode the bench the rest of the year

 

[HalfwayHandsome]

Freshmen year of high school. I came in late on the football team and was known as Rookie. I sucked at football but wanted to play cause that's what my whole family has done in high school. At practices I would fall and trip n shyt. One game I luck out and sack the QB in the 4th quarter. For a week straight I was feeling like Warren Sapp

Next game of the season when were going over the plays my coach is like "Rookie, I'm going to have you be 2nd string this game" I was nervous as fukk. 3rd quarter the D tackle gets hurt and they put me in.

"Alright Shark this is your chance don't fukk it up." My stomach had crazy butterflies, all my homies were watching on the sidelines, a few girls in the stand. It's Game Time!

I get out on the field and realize I don't have my mouth piece. What do I do, oh shyt what the fukk. I just get up before the play even starts and run to the sidelines everyone is giving me the . "I forgot my mouthpiece, I can't find it." Finally find it, get back out there eager like a beaver. "Hut hut..." I move. Penalty Offsides. By now my coaches are like

Finally get settled in ready for war no more fukk ups. "HIKE" everyone explodes on the D line but me. I was looking at the dudes around me and get caught off guard. The Right Guard was this huge somoan cat and dude just knocks me the fukk over. I land on my ass embarrassed as fukk . I get up and the both teams are hysterically. Get on the sidelines and all my friends had jokes. Got clowned for that the rest of the season.


Needless to say I rode the bench the rest of the year

 

[Poppa_Dock]

when i played hockey i played right defence

one game our center got hurt so my coach got me to take the faceoffs and come off D. i was

was hype and goharding, got myself a breakaway lost the puck and didn't have time to stop
went into the boards behind the net like this

 

[Rarely-Wrong Liggins]

this didn't happen to me but im almost positive this was this chicks most embarrassing moment and i didnt even know her... but anyway im on the train on july 4th and some chick i was standing next to musta been holding her piss all day because she just starts peeing on herself while wearing shorts too the whole time she's just standing there asking her friend for a pair of shorts and her friend is like understandably. There's this lil stream forming at the same time because of the movement of the train and it ends up traveling to some chicks feet who was asleep ... they ended up getting off eventually. the chick that pissed herself was cute tho

(this was on the orange line too... all my boston peeps know the orange line is where all the crazy shyt happens)

In all my times riding the bus/light rail I was never as blessed as you.

I would have asked for her number.

 

[Sinnerman]

my most embarrassing moment happened at a school dance freshman year of high school. I had been practicing my pop locking for a few months in preparation for this dance. so i see the nikkas making a circle and I'm like its my time to shine. So the first two nikkas go and kill it, then its my turn. so I glided into the circle() and tried to do my waves and shyt, but I ended up getting laughed out the circle. A nikka was frontin like I was just playin, but inside i was crushed like a motherfukker. will never attempt to pop lock again