Shake 'em up, Roll 'em up, Watch us Break 'em with the 7-Eleven: The Dallas Cowboys 2022 Season Thread

[duckbutta]

I'll be having my eyes on these two for this upcoming season.

Neither one of these dudes are a HOF Guard or Tackle so

If they aint got gold jacket blocking potential then

If they aint blowing open holes big enough for Zeke to waddle through and not get touched for 8 yards then

If we had started having Zach Martin give bi monthly semen samples his rookie year then we'd be halfway where we need to be by now

 

[El Bombi]

Neither one of these dudes are a HOF Guard or Tackle so

If they aint got gold jacket blocking potential then

If they aint blowing open holes big enough for Zeke to waddle through and not get touched for 8 yards then

If we had started having Zach Martin give bi monthly semen samples his rookie year then we'd be halfway where we need to be by now

Breh, I'm not going to waste my energy with you this season.

Especially with this already being a lost forgettable season.

See you in the 2023 NFL Draft Cowboys War Room thread next offseason, breh.

 

[El Bombi]

I just want to see a running back get the ball, hit the hole, have a defender in front of him, and make him miss

 

[darealvelle]

Who is in that suit?

 

[lightskin jermaine]

Who is in that suit?

Kelvin Joseph

 

[duckbutta]

We got all this smoke for Dak and Zeke but we also need to start asking why Toddler offense always be red hot to start the season and then we play THAT ONE TEAM that figures us out and then all of a sudden none of our lineman can block and none of our receivers can get open and Dak is running for his life throwing the ball 2 yards behind everyone on a crossing route

They refer to this dude as a boy genius cause he draw up some great stuff when he got a whole off season to plot and plan but the second a team says "we going to cover Schulz with a linebacker AND a safety" all of a sudden we toast

I'm so fukking sick of watching other teams throw a hitch to a receiver on 1st down cause the corner lined up 10 yards off of him and they get to 2nd and 4 and keep it moving and we don't fukking do it EVER

Why 3 out of ever 5 run plays go directly behind Zach Martin

Jet sweep to CeeDee picks up 14 yards and then we don't run it again for 5 weeks

I was on the toddler bandwagon...or i guess baby stroller...but the more I watch us play the more I see we running virtually the same shyt in week 12 that we ran in week2...

I thought that was the whole reason we got rid of Linehan

This boot tooth wascaly rabbit looking dude needs to not blow his offensive load in the 1st half of the season...every season

Toddler out here talking about they call a run play and a pass play every play but Dak can switch into any play at any time...this nikka got his skull cracked with a bottle I don't think he need to be put in a position where he can call any damn play he want when he want...need to be running uno dos or tres and keep it moving

nikka pointing in 4 directions and yelling and kicking his legs like he got a spider in his sock only for him to throw an incomplete 5 yard out

 

[dtownreppin214]

We got all this smoke for Dak and Zeke but we also need to start asking why Toddler offense always be red hot to start the season and then we play THAT ONE TEAM that figures us out and then all of a sudden none of our lineman can block and none of our receivers can get open and Dak is running for his life throwing the ball 2 yards behind everyone on a crossing route

They refer to this dude as a boy genius cause he draw up some great stuff when he got a whole off season to plot and plan but the second a team says "we going to cover Schulz with a linebacker AND a safety" all of a sudden we toast

I'm so fukking sick of watching other teams throw a hitch to a receiver on 1st down cause the corner lined up 10 yards off of him and they get to 2nd and 4 and keep it moving and we don't fukking do it EVER

Why 3 out of ever 5 run plays go directly behind Zach Martin

Jet sweep to CeeDee picks up 14 yards and then we don't run it again for 5 weeks

I was on the toddler bandwagon...or i guess baby stroller...but the more I watch us play the more I see we running virtually the same shyt in week 12 that we ran in week2...

I thought that was the whole reason we got rid of Linehan

This boot tooth wascaly rabbit looking dude needs to not blow his offensive load in the 1st half of the season...every season

Toddler out here talking about they call a run play and a pass play every play but Dak can switch into any play at any time...this nikka got his skull cracked with a bottle I don't think he need to be put in a position where he can call any damn play he want when he want...need to be running uno dos or tres and keep it moving

nikka pointing in 4 directions and yelling and kicking his legs like he got a spider in his sock only for him to throw an incomplete 5 yard out

That's ya boy's boy. Remember Dak demanded he stay on when Big Mac was hired. I don't think Dak has any intentions of learning a new offense while he is in Dallas.

 

[Ethnic Vagina Finder]

So nobody posted Cooper already hurt in Browns camp.

I’m starting to get a little optimistic about this team. There were some good additions by subtraction. I’m excited to see what Quinn can do in year 2.

The only negatives I have so far is Zeke’s workload and Tyron’s health.


As for the WR’s, I mean it is what it is. A lot of new faces. Maybe it works, maybe it doesn’t. But I will say, the difference between when Dez got cut and Cooper getting traded is Dak’s experience. It’s not the same. And Garrett isn’t here anymore.

 

[Spade]

Ahhh the writers in Dallas are now talking. What took them so long.





Glad to see this deluded fanbase lose its delusion.

 

[El Bombi]

That's ya boy's boy. Remember Dak demanded he stay on when Big Mac was hired. I don't think Dak has any intentions of learning a new offense while he is in Dallas.

It must be hard for breh to be a Spurs/Cowboys fan right now.

I can feel his frustration through my computer screen.

 

[lightskin jermaine]

Any brehs going to the Bengals game?

 

[darealvelle]

They saying our receiver situation is straight ass right now. Dalton is the best looking receiver we have right now at camp.

 

[duckbutta]

That's ya boy's boy. Remember Dak demanded he stay on when Big Mac was hired. I don't think Dak has any intentions of learning a new offense while he is in Dallas.

Yeah not going to lie I was a Toddler fan cause I was all caught up in our number rated offense scoring 33 points a game for the 1st 8 games start to the season

I also think Jerry likes Toddler and thinks he is going to be the next Garrett so I doubt it matters much what Dak thinks or feels about him he not going anywhere.

Wouldn't surprise me to see Fat Thumb get Wade Phillip'd by Toddler early next season.

 

[darealvelle]

Yeah not going to lie I was a Toddler fan cause I was all caught up in our number rated offense scoring 33 points a game for the 1st 8 games start to the season

He needs to learn from Quinn and learn how to use every weapon on the offense and have a plan for them.

 

[darealvelle]

offense looking terrible my damn