Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[The ADD]

Hmm I’m hearing you. So it’s moreso of a visibility thing - a more polarizing figure will always get more attention by default. I can definitely see that being the main factor a chaotic environment like a bar or nightclub.

Now onto your second point, I agree as well. And do you think there are universal qualities that attract women, if so what? And I’m asking moreso in the context of introducing yourself to a random woman. That stage of getting initial attention and getting their guards down before you can even demonstrate what kind of guy you are.

In some ways it’s hard for me to say. I’m way older then a lot of you guys so I’ll admit I don’t have scope on what y’all see day to day. I will say that to some degree you have to realize that dating is dating so there will be win and losses. I think a lot of brehs lose scope on that. I don’t mean you let yourself be treated any way but some chicks will be interested, some won’t, some will engage you for a certain period and then it will go away. Them be the brakes.

Universal qualities……yeah but some you control and some you don’t. Again I don’t think it’s something so get totally hung up on because if your aren’t her type then you just aren’t. Be clean, be groomed, have some level of fitness and go from there. When you do decide to shoot. Be confident in it. Don’t fear the rejection.

 

[King]

In some ways it’s hard for me to say. I’m way older then a lot of you guys so I’ll admit I don’t have scope on what y’all see day to day. I will say that to some degree you have to realize that dating is dating so there will be win and losses. I think a lot of brehs lose scope on that. I don’t mean you let yourself be treated any way but some chicks will be interested, some won’t, some will engage you for a certain period and then it will go away. Them be the brakes.

Universal qualities……yeah but some you control and some you don’t. Again I don’t think it’s something so get totally hung up on because if your aren’t her type then you just aren’t. Be clean, be groomed, have some level of fitness and go from there. When you do decide to shoot. Be confident in it. Don’t fear the rejection.

Makes sense. I come from that PUA era where dudes felt like everything needed to be optimized and there is always some universal hidden blueprint for success with women. One that most men don’t know which is why they don’t get “extraordinary” results.

 

[The ADD]

Makes sense. I come from that PUA era where dudes felt like everything needed to be optimized and there is always some universal hidden blueprint for success with women. One that most men don’t know which is why they don’t get “extraordinary” results.

I think that goes back to knowing what field you are playing on. Want to hit everything moving with minimal investment then you you better had all of those superficial things checked off. Want to have a quality relationship then gotta be prepared to do the work and break some eggs. There is also a middle ground which is fine too.

 

[Apollo Creed]

I think that goes back to knowing what field you are playing on. Want to hit everything moving with minimal investment then you you better had all of those superficial things checked off. Want to have a quality relationship then gotta be prepared to do the work and break some eggs. There is also a middle ground which is fine too.

the issue i see with Gen Z is brehs get stuck in analysis paralysis because of all then info they consume but have no experience.

the internet was around when i was young but most of us treated it as a past time tk download music and holla at chicks on myspace. When we got deep in HS or college we pretty much werent on it like that outside of mixtapes and uploading party pics to.

idk if less dudes are going to college but college is where youre supposed to be approaching chicks in your or different social circles (because some
Folks maybe late bloomers and really HS is too restrictive cause youre literally a kid) and learning how to approach and talk to women. But it seems like this isnt even happening so now dudes are out here awkward as hell.

 

[The ADD]

the issue i see with Gen Z is brehs get stuck in analysis paralysis because of all then info they consume but have no experience.

the internet was around when i was young but most of us treated it as a past time tk download music and holla at chicks on myspace. When we got deep in HS or college we pretty much werent on it like that outside of mixtapes and uploading party pics to.

idk if less dudes are going to college but college is where youre supposed to be approaching chicks in your or different social circles (because some
Folks maybe late bloomers and really HS is too restrictive cause youre literally a kid) and learning how to approach and talk to women. But it seems like this isnt even happening so now dudes are out here awkward as hell.

100% and I say that with zero judgement. It’s too easy to get caught in an echo chamber. This thread is a good example. Some good advice but at the same time without experience someone can take it and turn dealing with women int a ver adversarial thing.

 

[Apollo Creed]

100% and I say that with zero judgement. It’s too easy to get caught in an echo chamber. This thread is a good example. Some good advice but at the same time without experience someone can take it and turn dealing with women int a ver adversarial thing.

yeah. Im noticing a gap with how i see dudes treat talking to women as being something outside of normal human interaction. I get it for high schoolers but usually dudes find themselves during those college ages 18-22. So i’m wondering if dudes aint going to college then what sre they doing? Cause these dudes def aint getting to the money (if you not going to college you need to be in trade school or the military and stacking your bread).

i think the dudes having issues are skipping the self improvement step and trying to jump into the field when they aint ready hence their issues.

it would be one thing if it was young brehs in long term relationships seeking advice but surprisingly i rarely see that in here.

 

[Neuromancer]

i think the dudes having issues are skipping the self improvement step and trying to jump into the field when they aint ready hence their issues

Issue with this is that self improvement is a constant thing. I think too much social media has men thinking that they have to be perfect and that shouldn't be the case. Also when they see women or other cats putting in minimal effort they probably start questioning the game.

 

[The ADD]

yeah. Im noticing a gap with how i see dudes treat talking to women as being something outside of normal human interaction. I get it for high schoolers but usually dudes find themselves during those college ages 18-22. So i’m wondering if dudes aint going to college then what sre they doing? Cause these dudes def aint getting to the money (if you not going to college you need to be in trade school or the military and stacking your bread).

i think the dudes having issues are skipping the self improvement step and trying to jump into the field when they aint ready hence their issues.

it would be one thing if it was young brehs in long term relationships seeking advice but surprisingly i rarely see that in here.

I think the self improvement step has been misplaced. It comes across better yourself to get more women. It has to be independent of that otherwise your are just chasing a result in another way that won’t better yourself.

 

[Neuromancer]

I think the self improvement step has been misplaced. It comes across better yourself to get more women. It has to be independent of that otherwise your are just chasing a result in another way that won’t better yourself.

Very much so

 

[Apollo Creed]

I think the self improvement step has been misplaced. It comes across better yourself to get more women. It has to be independent of that otherwise your are just chasing a result in another way that won’t better yourself.

my thing is if the only reason someone is building themself as a man is to get women they already lost and will continue to get that work from women.

alot of dudes are blessed we have technology because in the past they wouldnt have made it through the rites of passages such as going to war and coming home which were gate keepers to getting women

 

[Neuromancer]

alot of dudes are blessed we have technology because in the past they wouldnt have made it through the rites of passages such as going to war and coming home which were gate keepers to getting women

Probably untrue. They are products of the time not the other way around. They would have been raised to understand these things and with the older principles. It all starts from the culture of the time.

 

[360dagod]

Issue with this is that self improvement is a constant thing. I think too much social media has men thinking that they have to be perfect and that shouldn't be the case. Also when they see women or other cats putting in minimal effort they probably start questioning the game.

Social circle plays a big part...

Men who have women in their immediate social circle will always have a built in advantage...

 

[Apollo Creed]

Social circle plays a big part...

Men who have women in their immediate social circle will always have a built in advantage...

these dudes skip the stage of building social circles. People shouldnt be under 30 with no friends

 

[Apollo Creed]

Probably untrue. They are products of the time not the other way around. They would have been raised to understand these things and with the older principles. It all starts from the culture of the time.

my point is they lucky they can exist in an environment where they can be losers, the dudes who would have made it back then arent crying right now, those dudes will win in any era

 

[DJSmooth]

Hmm..

I’ve had this nagging ass thought that has been fukking with me.

I’ve been reading some feminist theory to try and understand things from woman’s perspective. So we all know about their concept of toxic masculinity (dudes beating women, assaulting them, etc.) and how some of the things amen do could be considered toxic. And how we live in a gendered patriarchal society (there’s a gender binary that exists, men are seen as player 1 by default).

Now I know women ain’t a monolith, but you can definitely generalize. Why is it that on one hand I’ll read how women don’t like to be objectified as sex objects, etc….

But on the other hand, I’ll go out and see dudes grabbing women, physically imposing, stopping them, all that shyt at bars and clubs. Things that could be considered toxic online. But the women appear to like that shyt and validate that behavior by either giving play or being real polite. Like I don’t really see em making a fuss over it and a lot of those dudes who embody “toxic” behavior typically get a lot of the play from what I’ve seen.

Very rarely do I see meek overly respectful dudes get play like that. I’ve even experimented a bit myself. It’s always some dude doing the most and really imposing the fact that he’s a masculine figure that gets play (in those environments).

Why is that? Am I missing something or judging it wrong? Reason why I’m asking is I wanna know what’s really going on under the surface.

Listen to women brehs...

Not that it's ok but effectively picking up women at bars/clubs would be damn near considered sexual harassment.

Some times you get a "Ew nikka stop touching me" but that's why you got to become good at reading body language.