I don't post in here much because I really just have bad insecurities with some D/A, and never really cared about the pursuit of a relationship due to my only one being toxic and other things in my life that happened. Now that this has happened, I've become kind of stuck and caught up in my own feelings since it's been well over a year I liked someone like this.
The thing is with her flirting, I didn't realize it because: 1. I'm dense and didn't figure it out until yonder. 2. She's told me before that she isn't actively seeking a relationship/not trying to commit to anything way before I started adding up her interactions with me, which is why I never did anything. I never really felt anything for her in a romantic way until about the end of November, either. Nothing physical has happened, but all of my friends say we act like a married couple when we're around, and we've done things like play fight/argue. That's really it as far as interactions aside from the flirting via messaging.
It doesn't feel that way to me. When she asked me what I saw her as, I told her, but then she told me everything she said before again, and said it's better to remain as friends. One thing I do remember her saying is that if she had committed, then she would've ended up ghosting in the end. Where nothing makes sense to me is that, she told me she can't commit or anything, but she likes me in a romantic way? I really don't understand that part.
I'm pretty stuck on this situation, while I value everything that's going on right now, I want it to be something more and want it to work out. But, that just requires me waiting, which I don't know is the best option for me. Who knows if she'll still have the same interest when she's ready? She could already be finding someone else as it is, and I'm just gonna be here, still holding these feelings until I get over it. I don't mind being friends, and all, but the fact that we both have feelings for each other and I can't do anything about it because I want to respect what she said.
I've had a lot of people just telling me to wait, drop her, or say how I really feel about everything. The last thing I'm trying to do is ruin something here, because we're almost the same person as far as interests and hobbies go.
I realize that, but my own insecurities just make me doubt myself, it's still something I'm trying to get over, even with the therapy I've been taking since April.
i'm from the era of if you wanted girls...you had two options. approach. or join the football or hoop squad. lol
I know young nikkas aint cooking for these byrds so it might be a good date idea instead of some shyt Im gonna abhor like getting tea
