Porn Moves You Tried In Real Life To Negative Results

Kiyoshi-Dono

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Petty Vandross.. fukk Yall
picked my ex wife up on my shoulders to eat the box
Lower back popped and I commenced to
giphy.gif

On to our bed
Outta there for a week :russ: :flabbynsick::dead:
 

Diyhai

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Baltimore
I convinced my girl to wear a butt plug while we went out on a date one time:pachaha:

I put it in right before we left and we agreed she'd wear it the entire night:steviej:

I remember I kept looking at her while I was driving like:mjlit: but she was just sitting there like:unimpressed:

She was walking all weird when we got to the movie theater and we barely got past the opening credits when I looked at her looking all uncomfortable like:francis: and she said she was going to the bathroom to take it out
what is the purpose of the butt plug lol
just look like jewelry to me
 

Clayton Endicott

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A lodge of the Saints John of Jerusalem
Only shyt that hasn’t worked is anal, the thing is the girl likes it every time but it’s just not for me

other then that, every time I pull out a wild ahh position it hits every time :yeshrug: imma master fukker
Same. My wife enjoys it, but it ain't my thing. Vaginal >>>>>anal and it's not even close.
 

Orbital-Fetus

cross that bridge
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Humanity
Sometime during the Bush vs Gore presidential race I had smoked a blunt laced with dust. Went back to my girl's crib and was smashing with the tv news on in the background and they were talking about the race. I kept Thinking "Gore got this, he's gonna do X, Y, and Z when he gets in. This went on for I don't know how long but I couldn't nut and I couldn't stop thinking about Al Gore. It was strange.
 

Rekkapryde

GT, LWO, 49ERS, BRAVES, HAWKS, N4O...yeah UMAD!
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TYRONE GA!
Told a long term ex I wanted to paint her pretty ass face during head. she looked up and caught and it all… then she bust out crying like “I…*sniff* just don’t know how to feeeeEEEElllll!…” and starts sobbing. We both butt ass looking ridiculous while I’m trying to hug and comfort her with my dikk still hard and a crazy amount of nut all over her face, hanging off her chin, and in her eye smh.

Everytime I looked at her my dikk would get hard again and she’d start sobbing again lol. She got up and left the room trying to walk it off but looked like a pop tart. I had to get a towel, and wipe her off. I never asked for that shyt again, she made me feel so bad.
:mjlol:
Yeah that bustin on a girl face shyt does look like it's a recipe for disaster and backfiring
 

TripleAgent

Staticshock's mama always has my money
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The back of Mordith's mom's throat
:laff: you nikkas are JOKES


I don’t think anything ever backfired on me…tittyfukking isn’t everything it seems, it really feels like dry humping skin. It’s better if the t*ts compliment the dikksuck.
If it feels like humping dry skin, you're doing something wrong
Tbf some people just don't like certain shyt:manny:
If she's into you, she'll do nigh anything you like, and even otherwise, crying and running off is NOT a normal response.
 
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