Welp, I said fukk it lets go. Started off at Gate D 5B, max fuel because I intended to complete the entire flight. Programmed the GPS all nice and neat and then started my taxi. It was a long taxi, took a couple of minutes, and as I got closer I realized something ain't quite right
. Flight plan called for RW 04, opposite of where I wanted to start off pointing. So IF you follow the flight plan, take off RW 22 to the southwest. Get in the air, gear up, flaps up, AP on, toggle NAV, off and running
. It was some real pilot shyt if I do say so myself. On the climb up to 8000 feet I snapped some pictures, saw a nice sunset. By the time I got to the leg that turned northwest it was nighttime. At 172NM it's the longest leg, estimated 58 minutes to complete. So I settle in for a while.
About 10 minutes in I stand up to go take a piss but I kept my headphones on. I remember thinking it would be some bullshyt if something happened while I got my dikk out. Right on cue I hear some funny shyt with the engine. When I get back to the computer I'm losing airspeed and I see "L ECU A FAIL" "L ECU B FAIL", I look at the engine load and it's zero and the engine is at like 1400 RPM - I just had a total engine failure
. So I'm looking around and shyt tryna figure out what's what all the while the stall speed warning is going off. I cut the AP and it immediately goes left wing down, so I have my yoke cocked to the right like 30 degrees just to keep level. One hand on the yoke, other hand on the mouse trying to find the nearest airport on the GPS to touch down at. By this time it's pitch fukking black and I the first nearest airport, I can't even see the runway lights. I cycle to the next and it's a white dot 30 some odd miles in the distance. Through this whole ordeal I've lost about 4000 feet in altitude and I'm still cocked sideways like somebody's eye. I draw nearer and nearer to this airport, or what I think is it, and visually the shyt ain't matching up with what the GPS looked like. Closer and closer, about 2000 feet off the ground, 5 miles out and I finally get the radio to tune to their tower. I have a runway in sight and these MFs are like nah, use the other runway. I cross over the airport, get landing clearance, make my final turn on the verge of stall, and finally touch down
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I didn't figure out the true cause of the failure. Part of me thinks it was running the engines hard the whole time because I had temperature warnings several times. The G1000 NXi doesn't have the engine pages finished yet, so I could only see the coolant temps and not the cylinders themselves. The other part of me is clueless because if I lost the left engine due to temperature, I should have lost the right one at or around the same time. At any rate that first attempt was a metaphor for The Coli: cool at first until the fukkery comes to your doorstep, and then you gotta hope you come away ok
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I'll plan an intermediary trip from wherever I landed on through to Toronto and probably fly it as a sunrise flight.