I first met Jeremy Soule at a company Christmas party while I was in Vancouver. We connected over being artists. I was excited about being in “the game industry”, and the fact that I connected with someone like him. He was a fellow artist. He had philosophies about art. It was exciting talking about creativity with him, and the love for it.
At this point in my contract with this company things were slowly going sideways because of poor management (on the part of the directors).
We hung out after the Christmas party and eventually a friendship formed.
He acted like he was going to help me. He was something of a mentor in terms of learning the ropes of this industry (at the time it came off as that). He offered a lot of advice, and offered a lot of help.
We talked often, and I shared my frustrations and desperation about my situation with him. He knew what I was going through, and how desperately I needed this job to work out. He also knew what my VISA situation was like. He pretty much knew everything about me. I shared a lot with him because I thought he was a friend.
We started hanging out on weekends. I didn’t consider this dating because I was very clear with him that the friendship meant too much to me. I didn’t want a relationship. I wanted a friendship.
I never reached out to him, or went after him myself. Any contact with him happened because he would come up with a project that he needed help with and wanted to talk about it over dinner or while hanging out. I was naive and trusted that this was a friendship.
Most of the conversations between me and him involved him complaining about the women that wronged him. At the time I thought he was in serious pain, and that he needed a friend to talk too. Now I realize that this was predatory behavior.
The longer I hung out with him, the worst these conversations got.
He shared about how women cheated on him. He talked about one woman for who he paid for life saving medical treatment, but she rejected him even “after all his help”. He then went on to talk about another woman that he was dating, who had a very young daughter, and he found out that she was being molested. The way he described this was awful and graphic… the more I listened the darker it got, and at this point it sounded more like he did things to these women instead of the other way around.
Eventually he started to indirectly threaten my position at work, saying things like “It’s me or bust.” Jeremy was close friends with the CEO, and the CEO (my boss) would speak highly of him.
I was afraid of losing my job, and he knew how desperate I was because I shared with him that I didn’t know what I would do if this didn’t work out. I didn’t want to jeopardize this job so I was afraid of rejecting him and tried to keep the friendship.
As things went on, he started to become more misogynistic and sexist.
He talked about the mystical power women hold over men with sex. How men are helpless and they need sex. How he needs sex, and a relationship, so he can write his music.
He talked about how composing is sexual, and how he will write about sex as inspiration in his music. He talked about how performing music is very sexual. He wrote songs about women that he had relationships with this way. What he does to women, is what inspires his music.
The work he composed for video games is based on this. He “needs women to inspire him”… there was so much of this, very uncomfortable inappropriate stuff (inappropriate even for friends), and it kept getting darker and darker.
He made advances on me and I explained that I didn’t want this and wanted a friendship. He was very threatening, and didn’t listen. He made it clear that it’s “him or bust”.
He raped me.
Throughout this time Jeremy acted like a victim, and blamed women he was in relationships with (or forced relationships on) for what he was doing.
Damn filthy cacazoid
