- Imagine this scenario. WWE, a company that is suffering from not being able to build fresh faces, places a longtime star such as, say, Booker T. in a run for the World championship. And after several months of build, the veteran Booker finally gets to win the title. Before his first defense, the decision is suddenly made for him to drop the title to a young star who has some amateur wrestling experience, is on the way up, and is rife with long term potential, like maybe a Randy Orton. In the days following the win, Vince McMahon decides to book Orton against another one of his champions, one who he is very fond of for his toughness and shoot ability -- say, like a Brock Lesnar -- for the company's biggest wrestling show of the year, WrestleMania. Okay, that part is understandable.
During all of this, McMahon is also promoting a huge mixed martial arts event -- an event that he has spent more attention on than the wrestling product that's been paying the bills for so many years -- that is taking place only five days before WrestleMania. Now, this MMA show is actually competing head-to-head with a UFC and a Pride show, as well as the finals of a stunningly strong American Idol. (I know, I know. Bear with me folks.) Wouldn't that be crazy? Now, this MMA event has pretty much been a disaster from the jump. His planning has been a mess. On this show he's placed his wrestlers in shoots. A tough favorite of his -- who fans don't necessarily care for too much -- like Bob Holly against a kickboxer, who has already cleaned his clock once in a fight. He places another brash youngster like John Cena, in a bout against a man who is a world-class kickboxer, and capable of beating any man on any given night. Also, he takes a popular, ex-WWE champion like Chris Jericho and has placed him against a top-tier heavyweight shoot fighter. He has placed Jericho in this type of decision before, to horrible and disastrous results, but does it again anyway. In addition, he puts the man who has had the most shoot success, Kurt Angle, in a bout against an aged boxer with stupid match rules on the card as well. Aren't all these very scary thoughts?
Well, even more bizarrely he allows two more of his wrestlers to appear in these types of shoot bouts -- ON ONE OF HIS COMPETITORS SHOWS! He will let notorious shooter Little Guido face off against a man who is a foot taller and 200 pounds heavier, and he will also allow his newly crowned, young stud WWE champion, Randy Orton -- only five days before WrestleMania, mind you -- to go mano-a-mano with a dangerous kickboxer. Not only is that an almost incomprehensible thought, it's really rather dangerous wouldn't you say?
The bouts go off on that fateful night. Holly gets planted in 52 seconds and stretchered out. Cena goes down in 64, and Jericho gets embarrassed -- again -- in 62. On the flip side, Guido slays his giant and Angle easily dispatches of his pugilist foe. That leaves the heavyweight champ, Orton. Orton ends up getting in some good offense, but is incredibly overmatched, and ends up getting stopped. WWE tries to say that the stoppage was premature, but it stands anyway. It's announced that Orton is fit to wrestle after a trip that night to the hospital. Five days later, after McMahon has found out that his MMA show has officially been deemed a massive failure garnering an 0.2 rating during the same block that his competitors show -- the one with his world champion -- was pulling in 43% of the audience. That beaten up champ then goes into WrestleMania and wins his bout with Lesnar, but pays a heavy price as the veteran is rather stiff with the already battered young lion. After the bout, it's revealed that before the bell rang, the young world champ has suffered not one, but possibly two fractured eye sockets, possible nerve damage, a broken nose, and will be out of action for at least four months. If this was true, wouldn't all of this be just one of the most asinine, ridiculous, and dangerous chains for a professional wrestling company and its participants you've ever seen in your life?
Some of you who are familiar with wrestling outside of this country realized early on what was going on in the above paragraphs. But, considering that many a Torch and Torch.com reader aren't too interested in the happenings of overseas kayfabe, I'll fill in the blanks for you. Replace WWE with New Japan, and the names Booker, Holly, Cena, Jericho, Angle, Guido, Orton and Lesnar with Hiroyoshi Tenzan, Tadao Yasuda, Kazunari Murakami, Yuji Nagata, Kaz Fujita, Masayuki Naruse, Shinsuke Nakamura and Yoshihiro Takayama. And most importantly, replace Vince McMahon's name with the one of the biggest frauds walking the planet, Antonio Inoki. A man that dares walk around as some sort of deity who claims he can bring people together through sport who's actually a false idol that resembles a nut job parent that desperately is trying to live his failed fantasies through his kids.
In the days leading up to veteran Tenzan's first defense of the IWGP World heavyweight title, New Japan Pro Wrestling, who has had problems creating new breakout stars, made the stunning decision to have him drop the belt to one of the company's handful of rising stars in Nakamura. It was quite a surprising move, considering that Tenzan had been going through somewhat of an old-school quest in chasing Takayama for the title. For him to lose it so quickly, and to such a young grappler, may have damaged any main event status of his for good. Why was the decision made? Because Inoki -- who had made himself into a Japanese icon over the years by squaring off against fighters of other disciplines (as well as always channeling Rikidozan) -- wanted it so he could continue his quest of trying to show the world that professional wrestlers are among the elite fighters on the planet.
But the funny thing is, when it came to Inoki's "shoots" there was nothing real about them. The loss to Olympic gold medalist in judo, Shota Chochoshivili? Work. Win over Olympic gold medalist in judo, Willem Ruska? Work. Win over karate champion, Willie Williams? Work. Win over UFC I finalist Gerard Gordeau? Work. Draw with boxing, and cultural icon, Muhammad Ali? Possibly the worst work of all-time, for reasons we found out many years later. Win over bad-ass Don Frye in his retirement match? Work. Anoalo Atisanoe, Kim Klokeid, Akrum Pelwan, Everett Eddie, Karl Midenberger, Leon Spinks, Chuck Wepner, and all the rest. Works them all.
(Here's where I'll get in my obligatory boxing reference for the day, according to Stephen Brunt's book, Facing Ali before Wepner fought Ali for the title, he told his wife to go out and buy expensive new lingerie, because soon she'd be "sleeping with the champ." After he got his face pounded, she asked her Bayonne Bleeding hubby, "Do I go to Ali's room, or does he come to mine?")
Even if you're blind you see the disturbing trend here. Look, I have no real issue with the achievements that Inoki has accomplished in his time. He without a doubt deserves his status as an icon and legend in the business. But, for a man to send out other men who are only part-time fighters, or worse, barely trained at all into bouts against people where a well-placed blow could cause serious injury up to, and including, death, it's not just irresponsible, it's criminal.
Chono is going to wrestle again?
