I always feel like help is possible when we hit bottom and start to do what people who've been in our hole did to get out. Most people can't help. Doctors/therapists are not sufficient. But they can be a great resource if it's a good fit and there is trust there. We still have to put the effort to change our attitudes, beliefs, and behaviors. And it doesn't happen overnight.
Thread is weird for me, because I was just in my head about how I hit someone out of anger, and this is after threatening someone on the phone, it was just one of those days. And all I could reach on the phone was a good friend of mine who has experience some darkness, but have the two disease I have. Just having someone to talk to helped that night not to continue on self-destructive impulses. He had a lot of good suggestions that I put on the shelf for later. But there are just things I can't do anymore. I had to get rest, and start getting honest with myself, and and get back to living a new way of life.
That shyt about keeping busy/distraction is a lot of bullshyt. I agree structure and discipline are very important. But when u're locked and loaded, you're locked and loaded, and u gonna get what u want, whether it's drugs, money, gambling, sex, or food; and you will hurt yourself and others in the process.
EDIT
It still pisses me off that 90 percent of my family and friends don't know how i live or what I've been through, and i can't say shyt, cause if u haven't been through it, you wouldn't believe it, or you would prolly just cut me off. But i'll work on it.
Get rid of the iPod (give it to a kid or sumthin [use a disinfecting wipe, first]), use your computer in a open, public space in your home. You have a problem and it's being exacerbated by technology.
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didn't even read that far @Jmb4life have you ever thought about seeing a therapist breh.
