I am not someone who defends a show to the last, or creates wild arguments to support weak theories, but maybe you'll see the perspective I am looking at it from,....in addition to being very realistic, there is a bit of stylish operatic sense that plays a part, Ciro's love for his daughter is shown more through a few scenes, and music backed images, than a long, drawn out, relationship. There is a scene where he tells her "You have your friends....I only have you", and laying down in the bed with her, fetal position, when he shows her where he killed her Mom....I mean, that is deep, dark, twisted, loving material, but it's all in glimpses and shades.
I definitely don't look at her death like that, I didn't even want to watch that scene, as I saw it coming. It's about the human toll these killings take, and the loss of humanity. People are doing this daily right across the border from me, so, this show is real life to me, this is how it really happens and plays out. Kids get killed in cross fires, caught in the car, executed in their homes, this is a reality for many people. So, that's how I looked at it. And the show gives it incredible dramatic weight for Ciro, he could easily order the execution of Patriza, or Genny, or whomever, and continue the war of attrition, but he's done. He realizes the cost of death and killing, something he's been struggling with for a long time, and revealed clearly when he says he can't kill anymore.
Also, Ciro's daughter, is a child, and a woman in the sub culture of Italian organized crime, so if she comes off like persona non grata, it's a way of life.
And as far as unsympathetic.....I mean, the show is entirely insular. There are no outside characters for which the casual viewer can ID with, no white cop after them, (narcos!) no Hollywood boyfriend like that Escobar movie, no undercover fed caught in the mix, it's all in the world of retail drug wars of organized crime. I think this is where myself and other viewers can differ. These people aren't monsters, they aren't victims entirely, it's in between. This is the life. That's what it is. I see the characters as deeply human, their actions are all entirely in a world to which normative values are not applied, and they play by those rules. Thats what these people are like. That's the world they live in.
So, for many, I think, it's easier and makes more sense to view it as a "sports game" of sorts, which they gradually loose interest in, because the characters are somewhat repulsive to them. So, while entertained and engrossed, they don't quite grasp the more subverted dynamics underneath the show. Which isn't directed at you, just observations based on people I know, who watched the show. They seemed to lack the larger, and smaller picture.